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Clips from The Goldbergs - Wingmom (S03E03)

"Well, I'm just proud that you're sticking with it."
The Goldbergs
"Oh, yeah. Stick-to-it Barry."
The Goldbergs
"That's what they call me."
The Goldbergs
"Mom!"
The Goldbergs
"Dad secretly signed a permission slip"
The Goldbergs
"to get me in basic training."
The Goldbergs
"Now I need to have you secretly get me out of it."
The Goldbergs
"What? Shh!"
The Goldbergs
"Dad won't let me quit,"
The Goldbergs
"but Captain Wallace is super demanding and angry."
The Goldbergs
"He called me worthless."
The Goldbergs
"Are you (BLEEP) kidding me?"
The Goldbergs
"I know. Right? Worthless?"
The Goldbergs
"Well, obviously, he's never seen you"
The Goldbergs
"ride a tandem bicycle with your mother."
The Goldbergs
"I was doing most of the pedaling."
The Goldbergs
"Are you sure he called you worthless?"
The Goldbergs
"Maybe he called you wonderful?"
The Goldbergs
"No. You have to get me out of this, ma."
The Goldbergs
"Unless you want me to fly secret missions"
The Goldbergs
"to dangerous foreign lands."
The Goldbergs
"You can't go on a secret mission."
The Goldbergs
"They won't let you call home,"
The Goldbergs
"and they don't know what kind of cheese binds you up."
The Goldbergs
"So, you'll help? Don't worry, Snuggy-Boo."
The Goldbergs
"I'll get you out."
The Goldbergs
"Now, drop and give me 20."
The Goldbergs
"Huggies. (CHUCKLES)"
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: And with that, Beverly Goldberg went to war."
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: While I was still upset about our fight,"
The Goldbergs
"Pops was ready to extend an olive branch."
The Goldbergs
"Hey, sweetheart. You seen Adam?"
The Goldbergs
"I got him one of those Atari-Nintendo games."
The Goldbergs
"It's just like the red-car, blue-car game that we play at the arcade."
The Goldbergs
"Aww, that's so cute. But he's hanging with Pop Pop."
The Goldbergs
"Pop-pop? I thought he was bluffing."
The Goldbergs
"You can always hang with me,"
The Goldbergs
"you know, make the little nerd jealous."
The Goldbergs
"It'd be pretty damn petty of me to use you as some pawn."
The Goldbergs
"Oh, I'm totally cool with it."
The Goldbergs
"We can, like, go to the mall."
The Goldbergs
"So, this is all a ploy to get me to buy you stuff?"
The Goldbergs
"See? We get each other."
The Goldbergs
"I'll drive."
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: As Erica and Pops had formed an alliance,"
The Goldbergs
"my mom was waging war."
The Goldbergs
"You, sir!"
The Goldbergs
"We need to talk."
The Goldbergs
"Mrs. Goldberg, I told you."
The Goldbergs
"This is my lunch break."
The Goldbergs
"Eat your tater tots, Earl."
The Goldbergs
"I'm here for him."
The Goldbergs
"What's happening right now?"
The Goldbergs
"This is Beverly Goldberg."
The Goldbergs
"She's the Delta Force of mothers."
The Goldbergs
"And I'm here to tell you that Barry will not be returning to your course."
The Goldbergs
"And I'm here to tell you that your husband called"
The Goldbergs
"and said under no circumstances"
The Goldbergs
"should I let your son weasel out of this."
The Goldbergs
"He called?"
The Goldbergs
"Oh, this just got good."
The Goldbergs
"BEVERLY: Okay, then."
The Goldbergs
"Well, I have demands."
The Goldbergs
"Instead of yelling, you will motivate my baby"
The Goldbergs
"with kindness and encouragement."
The Goldbergs
"And you will never, ever call him worthless again."
The Goldbergs
"Well, considering you're asking me"
The Goldbergs
"to undo years of proven and effective military training,"
The Goldbergs
"the answer is no."
The Goldbergs
"BEVERLY: Or is it yes?"
The Goldbergs
"According to the school handbook,"
The Goldbergs
"any parent is permitted on school grounds"
The Goldbergs
"to tend to the well-being of their child."
The Goldbergs
"Oop. That gives me the legal right"
The Goldbergs
"to be my son's wingmom."
The Goldbergs
"Uh-oh. Wingmom?"
The Goldbergs
"Wingmom. That's not a thing."
The Goldbergs
"Oh, it is."
The Goldbergs
"I'll see you at 0900."
The Goldbergs
"No, you won't. Yes, she will."
The Goldbergs
"That woman isn't setting one foot in my class,"
The Goldbergs
"and you know why?"
The Goldbergs
"'Cause it's absurd and unrealistic"
The Goldbergs
"and will never happen on my watch."
The Goldbergs
"Due to circumstances both beyond my control and beyond reason,"
The Goldbergs
"I'd like to welcome a new ridiculous addition to our class."
The Goldbergs
"It's me. What?"
The Goldbergs
"You were supposed to get me out of this, not join me!"
The Goldbergs
"But now we can both feel the need,"
The Goldbergs
"the need for speed."
The Goldbergs
"Together."
The Goldbergs
"I feel that need alone, not with my mom!"
The Goldbergs
"I promise you won't even know I'm here, Little Schmoo."
The Goldbergs
"(ALL LAUGH) Little Schmoo."
The Goldbergs
"Now that should be your code name."
The Goldbergs
"No! It's Sky Shark. That better not stick."
The Goldbergs
"Infantilizing, bro!"
The Goldbergs
"Oh, no. The tastemakers have spoken."
The Goldbergs
"It's sticking!"
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: With my mom officially enlisted,"
The Goldbergs
"I had officially signed up"
The Goldbergs
"for a day of fun and laughter with Pop Pop."
The Goldbergs
"Hey, where's all the loose change?"
The Goldbergs
"You promised me pocketfuls of quarters."
The Goldbergs
"Hmm."
The Goldbergs
"While we're here, might as well play a few games."
The Goldbergs
"What do you think?"
The Goldbergs
"The only game I played when I was a kid"
The Goldbergs
"was stop the Irish from stealing our jobs."
The Goldbergs
"Okay."
The Goldbergs
"There's got to be coins in the fountain."
The Goldbergs
"I'll hold your legs."
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: My playdate with Pop Pop couldn't get any worse..."
The Goldbergs
"Holy balls!"
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: ...Until we ran into my ex."
The Goldbergs
"What's he doing here? How's my hair?"
The Goldbergs
"Looks like a Chia thing."
The Goldbergs
"Shut up and laugh like I said something funny."
The Goldbergs
"Since when are you funny?"
The Goldbergs
"(LAUGHS)"
The Goldbergs
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