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Clips from Mr. Mayor - Sister Cities (S02E02)

"Okay, we need to stall until the real mayors get here."
Mr. Mayor
"If I learned anything interning for Lindsey Graham,"
Mr. Mayor
"it's that you never tell the boss about the problem"
Mr. Mayor
"until you have a solution,"
Mr. Mayor
"unless you like getting put in the naughty closet."
Mr. Mayor
"Where is your farthest bathroom?"
Mr. Mayor
"Sir, how would you like to be upgraded to a speaking role?"
Mr. Mayor
"I'm in the union."
Mr. Mayor
"Yeah, yeah, I'll pay your rate."
Mr. Mayor
"It's $1,030."
Mr. Mayor
"Fine, I'll Venmo you."
Mr. Mayor
"Call my last number and ask Jayden"
Mr. Mayor
"what the hell's taking him so long."
Mr. Mayor
"Follow me. - I really need the--"
Mr. Mayor
"I will take you to the bathroom."
Mr. Mayor
"Okay. [phone buzzes]"
Mr. Mayor
"What up, Tommy from another mommy?"
Mr. Mayor
"Jayden, it's Orly Bremer."
Mr. Mayor
"Why do you have Tommy's phone?"
Mr. Mayor
"[gasps] You "Freaky Friday-ed.""
Mr. Mayor
"I believe you, and I'm here to help."
Mr. Mayor
"No, I'm just using his phone. Look, where are you guys?"
Mr. Mayor
"Okay, full disclosure,"
Mr. Mayor
"the ride is taking longer than planned,"
Mr. Mayor
"so I stopped for the mayors to get out and bathroom."
Mr. Mayor
"ETA is in flux because I don't know"
Mr. Mayor
"how I got in this spot."
Mr. Mayor
"I think somebody moved a wall."
Mr. Mayor
"Okay, I feel like Tommy would tell me to yell at you now."
Mr. Mayor
"So... Jayden!"
Mr. Mayor
"I know. I'm sorry, ma'am."
Mr. Mayor
"[cries] How did this happen?"
Mr. Mayor
"Okay, last question."
Mr. Mayor
"Am I playing this like I really am the mayor,"
Mr. Mayor
"or am I a guy convincing him I am the mayor?"
Mr. Mayor
"Do you really think you're skilled enough"
Mr. Mayor
"that those layers are gonna show?"
Mr. Mayor
"Get in there."
Mr. Mayor
"Ho! There's my buddy."
Mr. Mayor
"Ti kanes. [laughter]"
Mr. Mayor
"You enjoying yourself?"
Mr. Mayor
"Yes and no. I have some problems."
Mr. Mayor
"- Oh, you do? - I'm just kidding."
Mr. Mayor
"I love you. I brought you this gift."
Mr. Mayor
"Open it. - Oh, God."
Mr. Mayor
"He's giving him an imaginary box."
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, oh, oh, I get it."
Mr. Mayor
"This is a symbol that what we're giving each other"
Mr. Mayor
"is intangible."
Mr. Mayor
"Please, accept my box."
Mr. Mayor
"That's not a box."
Mr. Mayor
"Maybe I'm talking too much."
Mr. Mayor
"You tell me,"
Mr. Mayor
"how can we be helpful to the people of Athens?"
Mr. Mayor
"Give me the codes."
Mr. Mayor
"No, I'm sorry. The codes?"
Mr. Mayor
"- I need the codes. - The codes."
Mr. Mayor
"I don't have much time."
Mr. Mayor
"Do you maybe mean telephone number?"
Mr. Mayor
"'Cause I'm happy to give you my direct line."
Mr. Mayor
"Nope, sir, I wouldn't."
Mr. Mayor
"You think you can seduce me with this life?"
Mr. Mayor
"The shrimp, the champagne, the wallpaper,"
Mr. Mayor
"the chairs, the banister, the other chair,"
Mr. Mayor
"all the shrimp?"
Mr. Mayor
"Everything I do is for you and your sister."
Mr. Mayor
"- Yes, yes-- - No."
Mr. Mayor
"No, no, we are all sisters, yes."
Mr. Mayor
"I agree with-- no, please, don't--"
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, God!"
Mr. Mayor
"What just happened?"
Mr. Mayor
"- I don't know. - Bye, Dad, love you."
Mr. Mayor
"I don't get this."
Mr. Mayor
"I--I'm great in a room, but I just--"
Mr. Mayor
"I have made two of these guys storm out."
Mr. Mayor
"And the mayor from Makati, she started to FaceTime her dog"
Mr. Mayor
"when I tried to engage her about cybersecurity."
Mr. Mayor
"Have I lost my touch?"
Mr. Mayor
"No, sir, you didn't do anything wrong."
Mr. Mayor
"I did, and I didn't want to tell you before I fixed it."
Mr. Mayor
"These people aren't really mayors."
Mr. Mayor
"What? Well, then who are they?"
Mr. Mayor
"There you are."
Mr. Mayor
"Adnan, Bryce, Harvey, the rest of you,"
Mr. Mayor
"I need you on set."
Mr. Mayor
"Grandpa Tall Guy, let's go."
Mr. Mayor
"No, no, no, I'm the mayor."
Mr. Mayor
"Nice try."
Mr. Mayor
"The mayor doesn't work till Friday, and he's Black."
Mr. Mayor
"White mayors read as villains."
Mr. Mayor
"Tommy, where are the real mayors?"
Mr. Mayor
"You know that strip mall on La Brea"
Mr. Mayor
"with the foot-shaped sign that used to say "Foot Doctor""
Mr. Mayor
"and now it says "Day Care"?"
Mr. Mayor
"Dan, get the car. Tommy, come here."
Mr. Mayor
"- Sorry. - You knew this?"
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, what's up?"
Mr. Mayor
"You got more garbage in your hair?"
Mr. Mayor
"[laughs] Okay."
Mr. Mayor
"Um, yeah, I was just--I was wondering"
Mr. Mayor
"if you would maybe like to get dinner on Saturday."
Mr. Mayor
"Like a date?"
Mr. Mayor
"Like a date."
Mr. Mayor
"Right."
Mr. Mayor
"Well, I would love to... say yes,"
Mr. Mayor
"but I can't."
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, you can't."
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, cool, cool."
Mr. Mayor
"Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool."
Mr. Mayor
"I, um--yeah, I can't either."
Mr. Mayor
"I just remembered, Saturday, that's when "SNL" is on."
Mr. Mayor
"It's a rerun, but Drake--"
Mr. Mayor
"it's always fun to see that side of him."
Mr. Mayor
"So I'm busy, but anyways, thank you for your hospitality."
Mr. Mayor
"Okay. [laughs]"
Mr. Mayor
"- It's--it's-- - Okay."
Mr. Mayor
"[sighs]"
Mr. Mayor
"What is that? Oh, please don't hit me."
Mr. Mayor
"City Hall has access to so many cars."
Mr. Mayor
"What is this? - I wanted it to be special."
Mr. Mayor
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