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Clips from Archer - The Orpheus Gambit (S11E11)

"‐ You know, if you have something to say, just‐‐"
Archer
"‐ You're a fridge hog!"
Archer
"‐ See, doesn't that feel better than being passive‐aggressive?"
Archer
"‐ I‐‐I guess."
Archer
"I‐‐ ‐ Extremely passive‐aggressive."
Archer
"‐ So what do you think?"
Archer
"‐ It kind of looks like that thing"
Archer
"where you've been away for a long time,"
Archer
"and when you come back, no one really cares,"
Archer
"and people have moved on, and you're all alone,"
Archer
"and nobody understands you."
Archer
"Or maybe it's just a lady with big cans."
Archer
"‐ Oh, I don't know. Her cans aren't that big."
Archer
"[laughs] ‐ And now this."
Archer
"‐ You know, Sterling, I think it's important"
Archer
"to look at these cans in context of their era."
Archer
"‐ So what are you, some crazy rich millionaire?"
Archer
"‐ Millionaire? [laughs]"
Archer
"Oh, God, no, no, no, no."
Archer
"I hit billionaire at 25."
Archer
"This is actually my wing of the museum,"
Archer
"but that's not what this is about."
Archer
"‐ I find that hard to believe."
Archer
"‐ I know you don't want to hear this right now,"
Archer
"but the fact that you think me and Lana are impossible"
Archer
"is what makes you and Lana impossible."
Archer
"‐ Wow. ‐ Yeah, hits pretty hard."
Archer
"‐ No, I‐‐I've just never met a bald fortune cookie before."
Archer
"‐ Okay, I'll give you some time."
Archer
"‐ Who's bald! [laughs]"
Archer
"Whoa, oh."
Archer
"Krieger, what's going on with the Tactil‐Cane?"
Archer
"Krieger: Jesus, your brain waves"
Archer
"are all over the place."
Archer
"Is there a problem? ‐ Yes."
Archer
"I was just condescended to by an elderly geek,"
Archer
"and Lana was apparently using my coma bed"
Archer
"as a singles bar."
Archer
"Krieger: Well, technically, it was the hallway"
Archer
"just outside your coma bed."
Archer
"‐ How is that better?"
Archer
"‐ It's ten feet more respectful?"
Archer
"‐ Uh, new, better Cheryl here."
Archer
"Look, can we all just admit that seeing someone in a coma"
Archer
"is intensely erotic?"
Archer
"Archer: No."
Archer
"‐ Man, it was so easy to remember the good stuff"
Archer
"when he didn't interrupt it with his mouth and his face"
Archer
"and his general being."
Archer
"‐ Oh, well, I'm sorry for practicing a little self‐care."
Archer
"‐ Like the time I caught you practicing self‐care"
Archer
"in your office."
Archer
"‐ You know I wage a constant battle"
Archer
"against my impulses."
Archer
"‐ Well, thank you, Onan the Barbarian."
Archer
"Yeah, you got Bible burned."
Archer
"‐ What in God's name is going on?"
Archer
"I see sloppy positioning, uncovered zones,"
Archer
"and that dress isn't doing your hips any favors, Lana."
Archer
"‐ Well, at least my hips didn't produce a human disruption"
Archer
"on the scale of an ice age."
Archer
"‐ [stammers] Whoa, wait a second."
Archer
"I've had my shakes in the fridge for months."
Archer
"Why did you suddenly get annoyed?"
Archer
"‐ Dukes! Archer just made"
Archer
"some little comment about it."
Archer
"It's like he doesn't even have to try to cause problems."
Archer
"‐ Look, we had a great team dynamic going"
Archer
"before he came back."
Archer
"So let's just roll it back"
Archer
"to coma‐o'clock and‐‐oh, my God."
Archer
"‐ Wait."
Archer
"Was everyone really happier"
Archer
"without me?"
Archer
"‐ No. ‐ Is anybody really happy?"
Archer
"‐ No, it's not that we were happier without you."
Archer
"It's just that we became happier"
Archer
"when you weren't arou‐‐ oh, crap."
Archer
"That's the same thing."
Archer
"[soft piano music]"
Archer
"♪ ♪"
Archer
"‐ I would like four of your most"
Archer
"stupidly expensive whiskeys."
Archer
"‐ [snooty Belgian accent] Sorry, sir,"
Archer
"one drink per patron,"
Archer
"and we only have beer and wine."
Archer
"‐ Beer and wine? What am I, 12?"
Archer
"‐ I'll deal with you when you become more sensible."
Archer
"‐ That'll be never, pal. ‐ Bartender: Next."
Archer
"‐ [sighs]"
Archer
"Oh, Woodhouse, what happened to us?"
Archer
"‐ Oh, shit. You're talking to rocks now?"
Archer
"‐ No, no, silly."
Archer
"Just‐‐I was just looking for a real drink."
Archer
"You shining liquor angel."
Archer
"[gulps]"
Archer
"‐ See? Told you we'd catch up later."
Archer
"I missed the shit out of you."
Archer
"‐ Yeah, well, that makes exactly one of you."
Archer
"What is with everybody?"
Archer
"‐ It's been three years, numb nuts."
Archer
"We've had a whole thing going without you."
Archer
"Can't you just make an effort to fit yourself in?"
Archer
"‐ Boom, phrasing,"
Archer
"which we probably don't even say anymore."
Archer
"Look, I‐‐I'll try and fit in,"
Archer
"but what's with Lana and Methuselah?"
Archer
"Pam: I've never seen her happier,"
Archer
"and honestly, you two have a lot in common."
Archer
"‐ How do you figure? ‐ Well, now you both have"
Archer
"a lifelong relationship with a "Kane.""
Archer
"Ah‐cha‐cha! ‐ Oh, right."
Archer
"Lana Ka‐‐yeah. Okay, that's pretty solid."
Archer
"‐ Well, look who stopped being such a bitch."
Archer
"[cane clacking]"
Archer
"‐ All right, everyone."
Archer
"I'm sorry I've been a distraction,"
Archer
"and while it pains me to say it,"
Archer
"I will cede ground to you guys‐‐for now‐‐"
Archer
"and I will accept a..."
Archer
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