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Clips from Central Park - A Fish Called Snakehead (S01E01)

"Hi, Marvin."
Central Park
"-Paige? -Yes?"
Central Park
"I'm looking at the layout for tomorrow's paper."
Central Park
"-That's fun. -There's nothing from you."
Central Park
"And yet, you work for the paper as a writer."
Central Park
"Marvin, let me explain."
Central Park
"Are we about to have to talk about your Bitsy story?"
Central Park
"Yes, the Bitsy story. It's huge. It's a major scandal."
Central Park
"Paige, I know. But at the moment, it's all unprintable, unsourced dead ends."
Central Park
"And the paper you work for is called What's New, New York?"
Central Park
"It's not called "Unprintable Dead Ends, New York.""
Central Park
"There it is! Oh, cup. There it is! Nope, same cup. There it is! Nope."
Central Park
"Yeah, that's Dad."
Central Park
"-What's that? What am I hearing? -I'm up at the Harlem Meer with my family."
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"Owen's on alert 'cause there might be a snakehead in the Meer."
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"The fish? The fish that walks on land? Frankenfish?"
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"Yeah, eats everything. Yeah."
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"-That's a great story. Write that. -What?"
Central Park
"That there might be a snakehead in the Harlem Meer."
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"We don't know if it's really here."
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"That's okay. You're up there looking, right?"
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""The hunt for the monster." Plus, fish can't sue us."
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"-Marvin. -Paige."
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"Fine. I'll send you something."
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"Five hundred words. And pictures, get pictures."
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"I hope a fish does sue us."
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"-No, you don't. -I do."
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"I wanted to sue a fish once. It was in a taco. I'm still mad at it."
Central Park
"Speaking of wanting to throw up..."
Central Park
"I'll tell you what's not likable. Your shoes, your shirt and your shoes."
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"-Up top. -Huh? Oh."
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"Your hand feels weird."
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"Anyway, this is your expert? Ashley? Is that her name?"
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"-It was Debra, but nobody likes a Debra. -My mother's name was Debra."
Central Park
"And?"
Central Park
"Just let her work. You'll see."
Central Park
"Okay, three things to make you more likable right now."
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"Smile. Yep, just checking."
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"Don't ever smile again. You have what we call "bad smile.""
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"Okay, now."
Central Park
"Imagine you're trying to get little flies out of your eyes just using your eyelids."
Central Park
"-Good. Do that all the time. -That's amazing. That totally works."
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"Put your hand on your face as if you're sleepy and it's a little pillow."
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"-Good, leave that there. -For how long?"
Central Park
"Till we get those poll numbers up."
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"You can do stuff with your other hand. See?"
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"You know, it does do something. That's impressive."
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"-You're kidding. -Wow."
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"-Yep. -And we're just getting started."
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"Convincing this city To like this old biddy"
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"Is the hard job I'm here to do"
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"Now, as we've established You smile like a catfish"
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"And your resting face looks like"
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"You're taking a poo."
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"A strangler outpolled you In case no one told you"
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"That's what's called losing the race"
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"So before the hard hitting The first step's admitting"
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"New York doesn't like your face"
Central Park
"First up, Bitsy Brandenham Twitter, TikTok, Instagram"
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"-This Big Apple thinks you're the pits -I don't need to."
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"Bitsy, listen to this They think you're shysty"
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"I'm flirty and feisty"
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"-That's just the Long Island iced tea. -With Bloody Mary mix."
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"It's not okay"
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"What the bloody mayor is trying to say Is New York doesn't like your face"
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"They spit you out Because they've got New Yorkers' taste"
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"They look at you and smell a rat And they've had enough of those"
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"No one can stand you We've got to rebrand you"
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"New haircut, heritage, Pronouns, clothes"
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"Aesthetically, it's looking bleak Haute couture should make you pop"
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"Sit front row at Fashion Week Then tweak the pictures with Photoshop"
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"All we need is one good public stunt"
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"With just the perfect words"
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"That will lead New Yorkers"
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"To accept the little polished turd"
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"New York doesn't like your face"
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"We've got to give them something better To embrace"
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"Devise a plan to make them stand you That's what it's all about"
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"Bitsy, it's the only way To cultivate the clout"
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"Haven't you ever wondered, dear"
Central Park
"Why your staff all carry cans of Mace?"
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"New York doesn't like your face"
Central Park
"All right. If that thing is out there, we'll find it."
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"-How did you get this tangled? -It all happened so fast."
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"Mine was like this, I think."
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"-It was? -I don't know! Don't yell at me!"
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"-I'm not. -Well, somebody's yelling!"
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"-You are. -It's you."
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"I'm sorry. I'm scared of giant fish with teeth."
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"I'm not. I'm totally comfortable with them."
Central Park
"And send. There. Story sent. Editor happy, I assume."
Central Park
"Owen, we need a coffee run. Actually, we need a food run."
Central Park
"These kids have cranky no-lunch face."
Central Park
"There won't be any spicy cheese bread left at the farmers market,"
Central Park
"but what if I go and see if there's just regular cheese bread?"
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"Or just cheese. Or just bread?"
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"Yes, dying."
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"Mother, Father, give us bread."
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"Okay. I gotta get the boat in the water. Meet back here?"
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"Picnic in the boat. Very cute of us. Very postable."
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"-Hate it. Cramped. -Yeah. My drawing's wet."
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"We're just not a boat family."
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"Please, people, we're trying to catch a monster."
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"It's not really about the picnic."
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"They didn't have a big picnic scene in Jaws."
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"Well, maybe if they did, that movie would've been more successful."
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"Why are there so many people here all of a sudden?"
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"Maybe we actually do look really cute."
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"Uh-oh."
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"-Marvin. -Paige."
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"You posted my story?"
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"Yes. I put it on the site, and I'm rushing it to print for tomorrow."
Central Park
"Paige, it's only been up a half an hour, but it's already got more clicks"
Central Park
"than Doug's underwear story from last year."
Central Park
"Good. I hate that underwear story."
Central Park
"Hey. That was a great story."
Central Park
"I think he did it to get free underwear, but great story."
Central Park
"I'm worried. These people fishing--"
Central Park
"If they're trying to catch the snakehead, then they're probably using barbed hooks."
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"But that makes it harder to release the good fish"
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