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Clips from NewsRadio - In Through the Out Door (S02E02)

"my first impulse is to pick this one,"
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"of course, because..."
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"but you have outsmarted me before,"
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"haven't you?"
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"Like nine or 10 times."
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"So maybe I should pick the opposite one."
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"Or is that what you want me to think?"
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"That one."
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"You lose."
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"Oh, good lord!"
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"I tried."
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"So did I."
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"You're on your own, Matthew."
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"Let's try it just one more time."
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"Now, the dramatic pause in this section"
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"lasts how long?"
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"Oh, for crying out loud, Bill, three seconds."
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"Three seconds. Yes. Proceed."
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"All right."
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"And now please welcome the man of the hour..."
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"Now!"
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"Bill McNeal."
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"No! You're too late!"
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"Now they're just going to think you've forgotten my name!"
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"That's absurd."
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"Why can't you do a simple thing"
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"like count to three?"
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"Maybe there's such a thing as over-rehearsing. You think of that?"
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"Tonight is important to me, Dave."
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"Don't you understand?"
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"I've been writing my speech for months."
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"Look, just relax."
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"How can I relax?"
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"You're going to suck the air out of the room"
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"before I even get a chance to speak."
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"Well, thank you for boosting my confidence."
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"Screw your confidence!"
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"You're going down in flames tonight,"
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"and I'm going to end up"
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"with a face full of smoke and soot!"
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"Look, settle down."
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"No, you settle down! You settle down!"
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"Stop screaming at me."
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"No, you stop screaming at me!"
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"Bill, you're the most selfish, insecure, egotistical freak"
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"it has ever been my misfortune to work with."
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"He is the most selfless, humble, and confident man"
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"it has ever been my pleasure to work with,"
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"and I realize I should probably wrap up my remarks now."
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"AUDIENCE: Aw..."
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"No, no, no. Please. Please."
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"So without further ado,"
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"my very good friend"
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"and the finest broadcaster I know..."
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"Bill McNeal."
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"RASPS: Thank you."
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"I strained my voice today,"
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"so you'll have to bear with me."
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"Events like this one"
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"always remind me of a funny story."
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"Speak up!"
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"Events like this one always--[COUGHING]"
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"Listen to me. How did you do?"
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"I lost every single bet I placed."
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"Welcome to the club."
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"Oh yeah. Back in the early '70s,"
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"I had the worst losing streak of my life."
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"Really?"
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"Sure. Hell, yeah."
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"I even lost the games I fixed."
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"I know. That's exactly how it was for me today."
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"Well, there you go."
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"Stuff like that happens"
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"to us gambler types."
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"Yeah, yeah, that does happen to us gamblers."
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"Like today, Joe bet me"
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"I couldn't guess which hand the pencil was in,"
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"and I guessed the wrong one,"
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"even though the pencil was sticking way out."
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"You don't say."
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