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Clips from Seinfeld - The Serenity Now (S09E09)

"- What? - It means non-Jewish woman."
Seinfeld
"I know what it means. But what does being a shiksa have to do with it?"
Seinfeld
"You've got shiks-appeal."
Seinfeld
"Jewish men love a woman that's not like their mother."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, that's insane. - I'll tell you what's insane."
Seinfeld
"The price that I could get you on a new desktop computer."
Seinfeld
"- I am not buying a computer from you. - There's porn."
Seinfeld
"Even so."
Seinfeld
"Don't get me wrong, Mr. Lippman. I'm very flattered..."
Seinfeld
"...that you found me attractive enough to lunge at me."
Seinfeld
"But the only reason you like me is because I'm a shiksa."
Seinfeld
"That's simply not true."
Seinfeld
"If you weren't Jewish, you wouldn't be interested."
Seinfeld
"- You are wrong. I'll prove it. - Oh, no, don't."
Seinfeld
"I renounce Judaism."
Seinfeld
"What happened to you, pal?"
Seinfeld
"Joey Zanfino and some of the neighborhood kids..."
Seinfeld
"...they ambushed me with a box of Grade A's."
Seinfeld
"- Are you all right? - Oh, no, I'm fine. Fine. Serenity now."
Seinfeld
"Serenity now. Serenity now."
Seinfeld
"So you're using Frank's relaxation method?"
Seinfeld
"Jerry, the anger, it just melts right off. Serenity now."
Seinfeld
"Serenity now."
Seinfeld
"- Hey, what happened to you? - Serenity."
Seinfeld
"Well..."
Seinfeld
"...you are not gonna believe this. Now Lippman has renounced."
Seinfeld
"This shiksa thing is totally out of control."
Seinfeld
"What is with you people?"
Seinfeld
"- What are you looking at? - Sit down, Elaine."
Seinfeld
"Oh, no, Jerry, I can't take any more gentle sobbing."
Seinfeld
"I've been thinking about what it means to be complete."
Seinfeld
"Do you have an apple?"
Seinfeld
"Look at us, hurtling through space on this big blue marble."
Seinfeld
"Or a nectarine. I would love a nectarine."
Seinfeld
"Looking everywhere for some kind of meaning."
Seinfeld
"Why am I in such a fruit mood? Banana."
Seinfeld
"When all the while, the real secret to happiness..."
Seinfeld
"...has been right here in front of us."
Seinfeld
"- What? - Elaine-"
Seinfeld
"Jerry, I found a way to beat Lloyd Braun."
Seinfeld
"I buy the computers myself, I store them in your apartment."
Seinfeld
"Then after I win the contest, I bring them all back, I get my money back."
Seinfeld
"It's brilliant."
Seinfeld
"Wait, what's wrong with your leg?"
Seinfeld
"I'm asking Elaine to marry me."
Seinfeld
"I'll store these over at Kramer's apartment."
Seinfeld
"It's all right."
Seinfeld
"All fine."
Seinfeld
"Elaine-"
Seinfeld
"Jerry, I've got a lot going on with Lippman right now."
Seinfeld
"- Lippman? - Yeah, and him too."
Seinfeld
"What?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, yeah."
Seinfeld
"I think George is calling me, so I'm gonna go and give him a hand."
Seinfeld
"- Come on. Come on! - Can I help you?"
Seinfeld
"Stay. Stay. Stay."
Seinfeld
"Hey, Braun, Costanza's kicking your butt."
Seinfeld
"Watch how it's done."
Seinfeld
"Oh, hello, Mr. Vandelay."
Seinfeld
"Would you like to buy a computer?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, really? Two dozen."
Seinfeld
"Costanza, you're white hot."
Seinfeld
"If you'd like to make call, please hang up and-"
Seinfeld
"Hey, Braun, I got good news and bad news."
Seinfeld
"- They're both the same. You're fired. - Costanza, you won the Waterpik."
Seinfeld
"You're not gonna give away that Waterpik."
Seinfeld
"You wanna bet? Serenity now. Serenity now."
Seinfeld
"You know, you should tell your dad that " serenity now" thing doesn't work."
Seinfeld
"It just bottles up the anger and then, eventually..."
Seinfeld
"- ...you blow. - What do you know?"
Seinfeld
"- You were in the nut house. - What do you think put me there?"
Seinfeld
"I heard they found a family in your freezer."
Seinfeld
"Serenity now..."
Seinfeld
"...insanity later."
Seinfeld
"What happened here, Kramer?"
Seinfeld
"- Serenity now. Serenity now. - Kramer."
Seinfeld
"Jerry. I didn't hear you come in."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, the children, they've done some redecorating."
Seinfeld
"You don't look well."
Seinfeld
"That's odd, because I feel perfectly at peace with the world."
Seinfeld
"Eggs, you."
Seinfeld
"Oh, I'm sorry. Look at me, I stepped on your last rose."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, come on. Don't get so upset about it."
Seinfeld
"There's always next spring. Would you excuse me for a moment?"
Seinfeld
"Serenity now!"
Seinfeld
"Jerry, I did it. I beat Braun."
Seinfeld
"Serenity now."
Seinfeld
"Come on. Lend me a hand with the computers?"
Seinfeld
"Serenity now!"
Seinfeld
"Why couldn't you squeeze one of those stupid rubber balls..."
Seinfeld
"...to get your stress out?"
Seinfeld
"Why did you have to destroy 25 computers?"
Seinfeld
"George, you listen to me..."
Seinfeld
"...I owe you one."
Seinfeld
"All right?"
Seinfeld
"He's incorrigible."
Seinfeld
"- You wanna talk about it? - Please don't tell me..."
Seinfeld
"...you love me again, Jerry. I can't handle it."
Seinfeld
"George, letting my emotions out was the best thing I've ever done."
Seinfeld
"Sure, I'm not funny anymore..."
Seinfeld
"...but there's more to life than making shallow, fairly obvious observations."
Seinfeld
"How about you?"
Seinfeld
"All right."
Seinfeld
"Here it goes."
Seinfeld
"Rabbi, is there anything I can do to combat this shiks-appeal?"
Seinfeld
"Elaine, shiks-appeal is a myth. Like the yeti..."
Seinfeld
"...or his North American cousin, the Sasquatch."
Seinfeld
"Well, something's going on here..."
Seinfeld
"...because every able-bodied Israelite in the county..."
Seinfeld
"...is driving pretty strong to the hoop."
Seinfeld
"Elaine, there's much you don't understand about the Jewish religion."
Seinfeld
"For example, did you know that rabbis are allowed to date?"
Seinfeld
"Well, what does that have to do-?"
Seinfeld
"You know, a member of my congregation..."
Seinfeld
"...has a time-share in Myrtle Beach."
Seinfeld
"Perhaps if you're not too busy..."
Seinfeld
"...we could wing on down after the High Holidays."
Seinfeld
"Elaine?"
Seinfeld
"Lainey?"
Seinfeld
"So that's it."
Seinfeld
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