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Clips from Silicon Valley - Founder Friendly (S03E03)

"A brain like Richard's comes along once in a generation."
Silicon Valley
"Sorry. I'm just proud."
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"Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah."
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"Richard, I'm not asking you to spoon with the guy"
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"or even fork him."
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"- What I'm asking for... - What is that?"
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"Forking is when you use your dick and your two legs"
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"to stab him in the lower torso."
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"I'm asking for you to take 10 minutes and talk to him"
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"before you throw everything that we built away."
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"And yes, I did say we."
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"I mean, if you want to stop by Raviga,"
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"it's on the way to Flutterbeam."
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"I mean, I threw some Tyson-level haymakers at this guy."
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"Richard, he didn't flinch."
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"He floats like a butterfly."
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"Hey, Richard."
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"What's going on?"
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"- We've been talking. - Okay."
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"Guys, this isn't really a great time. Richard."
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"We wanna tell you something. Right?"
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"Yeah, it's something important."
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"Maybe later. So, Richard?"
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"Guys, come on."
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"We know you're leaving..."
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"- Yep. Well aware. - ...but..."
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"- We're not. Yeah. - ...we're gonna stay at Pied Piper."
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"Really?"
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"Why are you laughing?"
Silicon Valley
"I'm sorry. Wow."
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"Well, it's just that you really think"
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"that you're gonna be able to scale the platform without me?"
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"Goddamn it!"
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"- Yeah. - You don't think we can?"
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"Well, I know you can't."
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"That's a bold statement."
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"- Richard. - We have massive tech debt."
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"You really think that you can scale and deploy my library"
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"without any input from me?"
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"Are you serious here?"
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"- Yes, we do. - Yeah."
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"Then I guess you are truly delusional."
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"Well, I think you're an arrogant prick."
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"I'm the arrogant prick."
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"Okay. This is coming from two people"
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"who think they know everything about code they didn't even write."
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"We wrote a lot of the code."
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"- You wrote some of it. - You know what? We're gonna stay,"
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"and we're gonna build Pied Piper just to prove you wrong."
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"Okay. Thank you for the solidarity by the way,"
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"and sticking with your friend."
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"You know what, Erlich?"
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"You can tell Barker to go fuck himself,"
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"so I can go to Flutterbeam"
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"and then watch these two assholes crash and burn"
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"trying to build out Pied Piper by themselves."
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"This'll be great."
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"Great timing, guys. Thank you so much."
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"Premium stuff, Dinesh."
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"Richard. Richard?"
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"Well, we are now living in a post-Rigby world."
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"Man, this place is amazing."
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"Yeah. We raised a shit ton of money."
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"We're growing fast as balls."
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"But we're not exactly super psyched"
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"with the quality of our engineering."
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"Well, it's a good thing I'm here then, right?"
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"Yeah."
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"All joking aside, I actually have a few thoughts"
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"on your video platform if you..."
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"We're pretty happy with the basic platform."
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"We want to hand you something way cooler."
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"It's kind of like a secret project."
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"I got to warn you, though. It's pretty rad."
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"Sit right here."
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"Okay."
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"- All right. - Oh. Hello."
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"This is the present."
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"You ready to go to the future?"
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"Sure."
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"Three, two, one."
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"Bam!"
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"Oh. I... I have a mustache."
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"Fuck yeah, you do."
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"And check this out."
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"Turn your head. See that?"
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"Compositing perfect 3-D holographic mustaches"
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"using depth-sensing cameras in a live video chat."
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"And no one's doing it."
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"Nobody."
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"Sorry. This is the... this is the rad thing?"
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"Look, Richard, we agree, okay?"
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"We're not there yet."
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"We're using a crappy plug-in, so the latency is bad."
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"You turn too fast, that mustache is on your ear."
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"But with your help, we think we can cut our 'stache lag"
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"to just... 20 milliseconds motion-to-photon"
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"in... nine months?"
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"Just in time for Movember."
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"So, which one do you want on your employee badge?"
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"- Tom Selleck? - Aloha."
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"Ooh, Fu Manchu."
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"- John Waters. - Not bad."
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"Alex Trebek. Hitler."
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"- Probably not Hitler. Skip him. - Oh yeah."
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"- Bam. Sam Elliot. - Howdy."
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"Sure."
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"Oh. Uh..."
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"Okay, so we've got to hop on a call with biz dev..."
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"Okay."
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"...but feel free to keep on 'staching. Okay?"
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"- There you go. - All right."
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"Hey, if you want to have your attorney look over the employment agreement"
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"and the stock option grant, it's cool by us, all right?"
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"Just sign it. You're in."
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"- We'll see you Monday, man. - We're pumped."
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"Okay. Well, your pumpedness makes me pumped."
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"Uh, uh..."
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"Pete Monahan, please. It's Richard Hendricks."
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"I just need him to go over a contract for me."
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