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Clips from Central Park - Castle Sweet Castle (S02E02)

"Thanks. I miss that kazoo."
Central Park
"I did it. Out of the house before noon. Skin tag removal, here I come."
Central Park
"I'm not overreacting, am I? This thing is too big, right?"
Central Park
"It's like I work for two people."
Central Park
"Jarvis, aren't you forgetting something? Like, oh, I don't know, my freaking car!"
Central Park
"I'm so sorry, Ms. Brandenham, but the Rolls-Royce won't start."
Central Park
"- Oh, God. Please don't fire me. - We've done this tango for years, Jarvis."
Central Park
"You say it's broken, then you fix my car, and then we go back to not talking."
Central Park
"I'm afraid it's worse this time."
Central Park
"She's making sounds I've never heard before,"
Central Park
"like [imitates whirring] and [imitates clicking]."
Central Park
"Bitsy, I can just hail us a taxi."
Central Park
"Oh, a taxi. What about a rickshaw? Or we could share a roller skate."
Central Park
"Why don't we stop by a Payless shoe store while we're at it?"
Central Park
"I go nowhere without my Rolls."
Central Park
"- Just fix it! - Yes, ma'am."
Central Park
"Ugh. Looks like Andre Tagassi lives to see another day."
Central Park
"Great. That's great. Thanks. Great. Talk to you soon."
Central Park
"- Sounds like that went great. - It did not."
Central Park
"The Landmarks Preservation Bureau said they have to approve"
Central Park
"any changes we wanna make to the castle in person."
Central Park
"All right. One little obstacle. That's fine."
Central Park
"And you know what that phone call you just made means?"
Central Park
"It means we're doing it. It's happening."
Central Park
"One small step for man, one giant leap for our washer."
Central Park
"Yeah, they were actually surprised we'd never called them before."
Central Park
"They were like, "So you seriously have never tried to fix up your house"
Central Park
"in any way since you moved in?" And I was like,"
Central Park
""Okay, you don't have to say it like that.""
Central Park
"Well, he doesn't know how much we've changed"
Central Park
"in the last several hours."
Central Park
"That bureau person is gonna get here, look at our plans, and be like,"
Central Park
""Paige and Owen, this house is so lucky to have you.""
Central Park
"Yep. And then we'll get our permit, and the washing machine will get"
Central Park
"a one-way ticket to upstairs-ville."
Central Park
"We should probably get a pen so we can start crossing"
Central Park
"all the things we're gonna do off the list."
Central Park
"Yeah. Good idea. We should have more than one pen."
Central Park
"Put that on the list. More pens."
Central Park
"[singsong] Look who found the guitar before Cole"
Central Park
"and plays it really well."
Central Park
"[singsong] I can also play it really well."
Central Park
"You have special, musically-gifted children."
Central Park
"Should we hide the guitar maybe? Or break it?"
Central Park
"You guys know the guitar is a thing you have to learn, right?"
Central Park
"Maybe we could find someone to teach you kids."
Central Park
"♪ I wonder who could possibly Help them with that? ♪"
Central Park
"- Doesn't Elwood play guitar? - Nope, don't think so."
Central Park
"Oh, right. Elwood is perfect."
Central Park
"- [groans] - He's such a good player."
Central Park
"Hello?"
Central Park
"Maybe the best musician I know personally."
Central Park
"[clears throat] It's cool. I'm jealous. I mean, I'm not-- I'm not jealous."
Central Park
"That's crazy. [chuckles]"
Central Park
"What the hell? What did you do, Jarvis? Give my car an enema?"
Central Park
"I'm sorry, Ms. Brandenham. I'm afraid your car is not well."
Central Park
"[sobbing] It should've been me."
Central Park
"Hmm, well, it might be time to upgrade, Bitsy."
Central Park
"It's so old, the map in the glove compartment"
Central Park
"calls everything west of Louisiana "Spanish territory.""
Central Park
"[growls]"
Central Park
"I don't think she's happy. Maybe move that wrench out of her reach."
Central Park
"Why is Bitsy so attached to that car?"
Central Park
"Why don't we Rolls back the clock, if you will,"
Central Park
"to the summer Bitsy's father taught her how to drive."
Central Park
"It was the most one-on-one time she'd ever spent with her dad."
Central Park
"Seat belts are for cowards."
Central Park
"Everything is a parking spot if you park there."
Central Park
"Never go under 40 miles an hour."
Central Park
"[Birdie] He also gave her some life advice. I think it was advice."
Central Park
"Don't tip, ever."
Central Park
"And call everyone "chief." They love it."
Central Park
"Taxes are like games. You have to cheat to win."
Central Park
"Driving is like negotiating. You should do it fast, tipsy"
Central Park
"and make everyone feel like they're gonna die."
Central Park
"[slurring] Okay, I'm gonna go to sleep."
Central Park
"- [snores] - [Birdie] Bitsy loved every minute of it."
Central Park
"Not that she would ever tell her dad that because he would probably say"
Central Park
"something like, "Ew. Don't be such a girlie, ya girl.""
Central Park
"I know the car reminds you of your super great,"
Central Park
"not-at-all-narcissistic father,"
Central Park
"but what if we test-drive a car that can actually go places?"
Central Park
"What are you, a car scientist? [groans] Fine."
Central Park
"Jarvis, you failed me. I hope you're happy."
Central Park
"I'm not. Unless you want me to be. Do you want me to be?"
Central Park
"Whatever you need, Ms. Brandenham."
Central Park
"Hey, before we start our lesson, I just wanna say good luck."
Central Park
"Also, don't be mad when I'm way better than you at guitar."
Central Park
"It's just that I'll probably pick it up faster,"
Central Park
"and I kind of have the hands of an artist, so."
Central Park
"Well, as the best dancer in the family,"
Central Park
"I've got the rhythmical edge. So consider it to be on."
Central Park
"Sorry I'm late, guys. It's a long story. I lost track of time."
Central Park
"I guess it wasn't a long story. Who wants to learn the guitar?"
Central Park
"[grumbles]"
Central Park
"So let's start by making sure you're holding the guitar right."
Central Park
"With your arms is a good start."
Central Park
"I mean, legs is fine too if that works for you."
Central Park
"- You guys just have the one guitar? - Yep. We're sharing."
Central Park
"I'm using it first 'cause of my potential."
Central Park
"That's okay. Cole, you can use mine. Meet Rita."
Central Park
"I would love to."
Central Park
"Oh, wow. She likes you."
Central Park
"She doesn't usually warm up to people that fast."
Central Park
"Oh, it kinda seems like Rita's just being polite."
Central Park
"Shh. We're bonding."
Central Park
"Okay, this is it. Landmark Preservation Bureau guy time."
Central Park
"Let's put on your "you're totally giving us that permit" face."
Central Park
"- Yep. Doing it. - Ooh, I think that's your"
Central Park
""I just realized my deodorant's not working" face."
Central Park
"A little less determined. There ya go."
Central Park
"Um, hi?"
Central Park
"Does he see us?"
Central Park
"- You hear that? - Uh, excuse me?"
Central Park
"Only an original, Gilded Age door would make a sound like that."
Central Park
"Oh, right. It's so great. Um, where are you going?"
Central Park
"I'm Iggy Martino, your project manager."
Central Park
"Wow, these are the original windowpanes from 1872. I need a picture. Panes pic!"
Central Park
"I can't believe I'm actually inside this castle."
Central Park
"Do you guys feel that? Do you feel it?"
Central Park
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