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Clips from Weeds - Yes I Can (S04E04)

"Well, people collect dishes, corks, old gynecological instruments."
Weeds
"Mom, why are you Googling the mayor of Tijuana?"
Weeds
"- What? - The history menu."
Weeds
"It's sandwiched between caffeine side effects..."
Weeds
"...and the Ren Mar Unified School District."
Weeds
"It doesn't feel like Silas."
Weeds
"It's important to know our neighbors to the south."
Weeds
"Speaking of which, where's Davenport?"
Weeds
"I wanna ask him if he can drywall."
Weeds
"We're gonna be doing some remodeling here."
Weeds
"Thank God. I need my own room."
Weeds
"I can't handle the nightly earthquakes anymore."
Weeds
"- Earthquakes? - I was scratching. I think there's fleas."
Weeds
"I swear to God. Perv, we're in a bunk bed."
Weeds
"- What the hell is wrong with you? - Hey, it's a family tradition."
Weeds
"Okay, Delta pledges..."
Weeds
"...stop embarrassing your fellow brethren."
Weeds
"And, freshmen, find somewhere else to scratch your fleas."
Weeds
"I say, tear the place down, start from scratch."
Weeds
"Yeah, you would."
Weeds
"Like all those tasteless assholes up and down the block..."
Weeds
"...who replace charming beach cottages with monstrous boxes."
Weeds
""Oh, we need more room.""
Weeds
"Then, work with what you have or fucking move!"
Weeds
"I'm just asking for a second bathroom."
Weeds
"- That's okay, then. - You feeling flush?"
Weeds
"Bathrooms are expensive, and I need a long tub."
Weeds
"We could save money if we didn't use a contractor. I could do it."
Weeds
"It's a big job, sweetie."
Weeds
"But I'm cheap and I don't ask questions."
Weeds
"You're hired."
Weeds
"You realize it's not our house to remodel. It's Lenny's."
Weeds
"I want my own fucking bathroom."
Weeds
"Jeez. What are you complaining about? We got Celia out of here."
Weeds
"You. Boys."
Weeds
"Boys are disgusting."
Weeds
"Okay, okay, let's settle down."
Weeds
"You got that kind of cash around?"
Weeds
"Gonna explore some opportunities."
Weeds
"Oh, my God, he's huge."
Weeds
"- Two weeks old? - Gigantism runs in Clinique's family."
Weeds
"Of course it does."
Weeds
"- God. C-section? - Nope. Shot out like a PEZ."
Weeds
"I got a great pelvis. That's what everybody say."
Weeds
"So, business. How much of the valley do you think you could cover?"
Weeds
"I might be coming into some bulk product."
Weeds
"A hundred pounds would be gone in a week."
Weeds
"- Seriously? - You left a vacuum, Nancy."
Weeds
"People are sad. Things are burned. They need their weed."
Weeds
"Okay. Good. Very good to know."
Weeds
"- God, he's huge. - Yeah, tell me about it."
Weeds
"Goodbye, Miata. Hello, minivan."
Weeds
"Fuck your Miata with a strap-on, little bitch. We getting an Escalade."
Weeds
"Let's do this shit."
Weeds
"I have health insurance now and a guesthouse."
Weeds
"But the man, Mr. Caplan, he don't wipe so good."
Weeds
"Always leaving shit slicks everywhere."
Weeds
"In the underwear, on the toilet seat, the sheets."
Weeds
"I don't know how she live with him."
Weeds
"- You wanna sell drugs? - I have to leave my guesthouse?"
Weeds
"I like living in Beverly Hills."
Weeds
"- He's an agent. - Sell to his agent friends."
Weeds
"They like to party with all the money..."
Weeds
"...they made off other people's work, right?"
Weeds
"Yes, they love to party."
Weeds
"You have cocaine? They like that too."
Weeds
"No. No cocaine. Just pot."
Weeds
"- You should think about the cocaine. - No."
Weeds
"- And the Ecstasy. - No."
Weeds
"Okay. I get that from Geffen's maid."
Weeds
"What? Why are you looking at me funny?"
Weeds
"Because you ain't said nothing."
Weeds
"Haven't you noticed something different about me?"
Weeds
"I lost 10 pounds."
Weeds
"Oh, right. Of course you did."
Weeds
"Good for you. You look terrific."
Weeds
"Thanks. Feels good. You know..."
Weeds
"...finally back to my high school weight."
Weeds
"You should be so proud."
Weeds
"And I bet the women are beating down your door."
Weeds
"Now, that's what I'm hoping for. New town, new pussy."
Weeds
"New customer base."
Weeds
"My cousin Vernon, he'll take care of that. He just need the product."
Weeds
"You sure Guillermo ain't got no connections up there to fuck things up?"
Weeds
"- You know, that guy, he made me cry. - Oakland's a long way..."
Weeds
"...from Los Angeles, Marvin. You don't have to worry about Guillermo."
Weeds
"Sweet."
Weeds
"Yes, sweet."
Weeds
"Keep the fanny pack tucked inside your hoodie..."
Weeds
"...until we're back on American soil."
Weeds
"They have quick hands."
Weeds
"Why can't you buy drugs in the U.S., like a normal person?"
Weeds
"Because I have no health insurance, no money, and an arrest record."
Weeds
"Let's look at this as a cultural expedition to a primitive land."
Weeds
"Xanax? Valium? Ativan?"
Weeds
"- Restylane. - No Xanax?"
Weeds
"No Xanax. Restylane."
Weeds
"Dos cc's."
Weeds
"Where are we gonna live when Dad's FEMA vouchers run out?"
Weeds
"- Oh, I'll find a place. - With what money?"
Weeds
"With the money I am making from my job."
Weeds
"- As a salesclerk? - Yes."
Weeds
"- And where am I gonna go to school? - I don't know."
Weeds
"Wherever Shane goes. I'll talk to Nancy."
Weeds
"- Xanax? - No Xanax. Restylane."
Weeds
"- Generic cheaper. - Mexican generic, hyaluronic acid."
Weeds
"Do I wanna look like the Joker? No."
Weeds
"No generic."
Weeds
"It's a front, isn't it?"
Weeds
"- What's a front? - The maternity store. It's a drug front."
Weeds
"We passed a taco cart. Why don't you get one?"
Weeds
"- I don't want one. - Well, I do. Get me one."
Weeds
"Get it yourself. I just spent months getting everything for Dad."
Weeds
"Get me a fucking taco."
Weeds
"Look, you wanted this, not me."
Weeds
"Well, you got it. Welcome to my life."
Weeds
"Broke, homeless, not a man in sight. Although it's not your issue."
Weeds
"No prospects, no direction."
Weeds
"No hope for relief from the crushing defeat and futility..."
Weeds
"...and just pure bad luck that is my fate."
Weeds
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