Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from The Great North - Beef's Craig Beef Adventure (S02E02)

"You're a cool, rich, single guy"
The Great North
"with a really nice boat until very, very recently."
The Great North
"Everyone loves you, and you probably already own a Sea-Doo."
The Great North
"I have a Yamaha"
The Great North
"and one of those water jet pack things,"
The Great North
"but I didn't win."
The Great North
"You did, Beef."
The Great North
"Because I don't have Kuh... Kuh..."
The Great North
"- Corn! - Candy? - Candy corn!"
The Great North
"I have some left over from Halloween, Craig."
The Great North
"You can have all of it."
The Great North
"All this over some candy corn. Makes me sick."
The Great North
"You don't have what, Craig?"
The Great North
"Kathleen. And it's all your fault."
The Great North
"What are you talking about?"
The Great North
"You and Kathleen never even dated."
The Great North
"But we should have."
The Great North
"You ruined my chances with her at my birthday party."
The Great North
"Our birthday party."
The Great North
"The joint one we had when we both turned 18."
The Great North
"I came out of the bathroom,"
The Great North
"and you called me... you called me..."
The Great North
"Craig Turd-migan!"
The Great North
"After that, everyone started calling me Turd-migan."
The Great North
"And Kathleen went home with you that night instead of me."
The Great North
"I wasn't even taking a turd."
The Great North
"I was vomiting."
The Great North
"You got Kathleen, and every time I see you,"
The Great North
"I'm Craig Turd-migan all over again."
The Great North
"Sorry, Craig. I was young and dumb."
The Great North
"Hey, Dad, Craig passed out from the cold."
The Great North
"Whoops. I'm on it."
The Great North
"Thanks for saving me, Beef."
The Great North
"While I was in the water, I got some clarity."
The Great North
"Also hallucinations, but mostly clarity."
The Great North
"I've always had a little Kathleen-shaped hole in my heart"
The Great North
"and turning 40 only made it worse."
The Great North
"But I realized I don't want your life, Beef."
The Great North
"I hate kids. That's why I donate playground equipment."
The Great North
"I prefer they stay there and away from me."
The Great North
"I feel the same."
The Great North
"About not wanting your life, not about kids."
The Great North
"I believe kids are funny,"
The Great North
"smaller versions of regular people."
The Great North
"Also, I love mine."
The Great North
"And you know Kathleen left me, right?"
The Great North
"Aw, man, I would love to be left by Kathleen."
The Great North
"There's still time."
The Great North
"Thanks, man."
The Great North
"I have a confession."
The Great North
"I tried to save these herring,"
The Great North
"but instead, I accidentally killed them."
The Great North
"In the heat of the moment,"
The Great North
"I put them in fresh water instead of salt water."
The Great North
"Molly of Denali, with that herring"
The Great North
"and your bar mitzvah money,"
The Great North
"we'd have enough to rent a Sea-Doo."
The Great North
"Eh. I realized something out on the water, too."
The Great North
"Growing old isn't about grasping at youth"
The Great North
"by getting a Sea-Doo."
The Great North
"It's about grace and dignity and..."
The Great North
"Ah, screw it, let's rent that Doo."
The Great North
"Midlife crisis?"
The Great North
"More like midlife how-nice-is-this."
The Great North
"My Doo hole runneth over."
The Great North
"♪ Vroom ♪"
The Great North
"Sea-Doo magoo."
The Great North
"I'm getting one of these for the tub."
The Great North
"If this is a midlife crisis, I'll have what I'm having."
The Great North
"♪ That moves. ♪"
The Great North
"Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH"
The Great North