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Clips from King Ralph

"- You should get back to the palace now. - I don't wanna get back to the palace."
King Ralph
"- There's gotta be some place we can go- - Well, maybe one."
King Ralph
"MIRANDA: Two, three, four, side..."
King Ralph
"Two, three, four, forward..."
King Ralph
"Two, three, four, side..."
King Ralph
"Hope you're not too upset about this 'mystery woman' thing."
King Ralph
"The girls at work said it was probably some East End tart..."
King Ralph
"trying to get her picture in the papers."
King Ralph
"I wish we could meet again, somewhere else, in different circumstances."
King Ralph
"Different circumstances?"
King Ralph
"We got the park, we got the lake, we got the moon, we got the stars."
King Ralph
"What else do we need?"
King Ralph
"Yeah."
King Ralph
"What? What is it, this 'commoner' thing?"
King Ralph
"Edward VIII and that Wallis broad? That was 50 years ago. This is the '90s."
King Ralph
"We gotta be able to work somethin' out. Anything's possible."
King Ralph
"Not in England. Not for royalty."
King Ralph
"Don't say that."
King Ralph
"I can't see myself making it here without you, Miranda."
King Ralph
"Now, this is exceptional."
King Ralph
"You realise, don't you, that you're looking at the fall of the House of Wyndham?"
King Ralph
"And before long, the House of Stuart will be restored to its rightful place."
King Ralph
"And you, Gordon, will be private secretary to the king."
King Ralph
"- Thank you. - Excuse me, my Lord."
King Ralph
"A Miss Miranda Greene to see you."
King Ralph
"Lord Graves."
King Ralph
"What an unexpected surprise."
King Ralph
"Here's your money. All of it."
King Ralph
"I'm just glad that I got out now before any real damage was done."
King Ralph
"You can't bluff me. I know what you're after."
King Ralph
"You just want more money."
King Ralph
"You're right. Then there'd be more to give back."
King Ralph
"Come back here, you little strumpet!"
King Ralph
"I rather enjoyed that."
King Ralph
"Welcome to Windsor Castle, Your Majesty. The Prime Minister will be here shortly."
King Ralph
"There's something he wishes to talk to you about."
King Ralph
"The peak goes to the front, Your Majesty."
King Ralph
"Now that you've handled the Zambezi reception so famously..."
King Ralph
"we feel that you're ready to help us with a matter of even greater national import."
King Ralph
"I don't know if you're aware of it..."
King Ralph
"but Finland recently discovered large oil deposits in their area of the Baltic Sea."
King Ralph
"One of our companies is bidding for the contract..."
King Ralph
"to supply all the platforms and drilling equipment..."
King Ralph
"a contract that could create thousands of jobs in the Northeast."
King Ralph
"Unfortunately, we're getting spirited competition from the Japanese."
King Ralph
"I've heard they can be a problem. What are we hunting, Ced?"
King Ralph
"I believe it's pheasant, Your Majesty."
King Ralph
"At present, the competition seems to be what you call a 'toss-up'."
King Ralph
"However, we have one more ace to play."
King Ralph
"The King of Finland is due here in two weeks on a state visit."
King Ralph
"- Is this gun loaded, Ced? - Yes."
King Ralph
"You will, in keeping with tradition, be hosting a royal banquet for him."
King Ralph
"I'm afraid we won't be able to get by on pretzels and beer this time."
King Ralph
"The king will be with his daughter..."
King Ralph
"Princess Anna, one of the most socially desirable women in the world."
King Ralph
"Does that mean she's ugly?"
King Ralph
"Far from it. We're organising a ball in her honour to follow the banquet..."
King Ralph
"so that you two can get to know each other better."
King Ralph
"Excuse me, Your Majesty. The beaters are approaching."
King Ralph
"Here they come, Your Majesty."
King Ralph
"They're over."
King Ralph
"(SQUEALING)"
King Ralph
"Did I get one?"
King Ralph
"Fortunately, it's only a flesh wound."
King Ralph
"Now, if everything proceeds as it should..."
King Ralph
"this ball will be the first step toward the royal wedding of the century."
King Ralph
"Wedding? You mean her and me?"
King Ralph
"Yes, you and her."
King Ralph
"This is going too far. You can't tell me who to marry."
King Ralph
"- Isn't being king worth something? - Yes, that's why you must marry."
King Ralph
"- To protect your birthright. - What about matters of the heart?"
King Ralph
"They must be subordinated to the good of the monarchy."
King Ralph
"You're the last of the Wyndhams. A queen must be found to perpetuate the line."
King Ralph
"Princess Anna is the best of the acceptable candidates."
King Ralph
"I know it's difficult, but there are times when you must put aside personal desires."
King Ralph
"A king's life is not always his own!"
King Ralph
"- You're serious about this. - Yes!"
King Ralph
"Well, I got news for ya. My life is my own and I can't take this shit any more."
King Ralph
"I got everything in the world and nothin' I need. No friends, no freedom, no fun."
King Ralph
"At least back in the States I could screw up my life as I saw fit."
King Ralph
"Take this job and shove it down somebody else's throat, cos I quit! I'm outta here!"
King Ralph
"You'd walk out on the English people?"
King Ralph
"- I told you I was the wrong guy for this. - You're wrong for everything, Ralph."
King Ralph
"Who are you callin' 'Ralph'? It's 'Your Majesty'!"
King Ralph
"Not any more. You quit, just as you quit the bear scouts."
King Ralph
"- Cub scouts. - Little League, high-school band..."
King Ralph
"three colleges and an assortment of jobs too numerous to mention!"
King Ralph
"Now you want me to quit on Miranda and any chance at a normal life."
King Ralph
"That shirt is not yours."
King Ralph
"I wasn't born to this crap. You can't expect me to accept these restrictions."
King Ralph
"What of the thousands of workers who will benefit?"
King Ralph
"- Maybe something else'll come along. - Will it?"
King Ralph
"Are you willing to bet their future on it for a woman you've known a few weeks?"
King Ralph
"You want me to marry one I don't know at all!"
King Ralph
"I'm asking you to think of something larger than yourself."
King Ralph
"To accept responsibility for once..."
King Ralph
"without beating retreat at the first sign of difficulty."
King Ralph
"The throne of England is not a job to be discarded when it's your bowling night!"
King Ralph
"First sign of difficulty? You've been destroying my fantasy for weeks."
King Ralph
"It's up to you whether you embrace this situation as a challenge to your abilities..."
King Ralph
"or simply to chalk it up as another failure, a monument to your own passivity."
King Ralph
"I think it's time you made a stand somewhere for something."
King Ralph
"If not now, then when?"
King Ralph
"There's no guarantee I'll be attracted to her."
King Ralph
"Then we'll get her a G-string and some pasties..."
King Ralph
"but you must not shrink from your duty."
King Ralph
"To refuse to receive her now would be disastrous for England."
King Ralph
"Your family, your government and the people of England are counting on you."
King Ralph
"You owe it to them and to yourself."
King Ralph
"OK, I'll give it a shot."
King Ralph
"Thank you, Your Majesty. You won't regret it."
King Ralph
"I remain your humble servant."
King Ralph
"(PHONE RINGS)"
King Ralph
"Hello."
King Ralph
"- Hello, Ralph. - Miranda?"
King Ralph
"- There's something I have to tell you. - Yeah, I was just gonna call you."
King Ralph
"- I don't think we should see each other. - What?"
King Ralph
"I mean, I really wish I could. You just have to trust me. It's not a good idea."
King Ralph
"Yeah, they're puttin' the pressure on me over here, too."
King Ralph
"It could never have worked out."
King Ralph
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