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Clips from NewsRadio - Planbee (S04E04)

"- No, we didn't. - Oh, well, then who did?"
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"I just wish I'd been here to see that. Matthew?"
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"twice as much money as we're bringin' in."
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"but this should read six percent,"
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"Jimmy, how dare you try and sell this station without warning us?"
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"more so now than ever before, thanks to that raise I got last month."
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"Mr. James brings us a message here this morning,"
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"I know, sir, but I-- And if we were, we'd be lookin'..."
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"at a lot of dead baby cows and a bushelful of the world's smallest tomatoes."
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"but I think that-- That we should start firing people?"
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"I'm sorry, I'm still not clear on this."
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"Are you telling me that due to some screwed up paperwork, Spaz actually got a raise?"
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"No. No, no more plans. Plan "A" was a bust."
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"Ladies and gentlemen, I would like you to meet Plan "B.""
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"No. Wait a minute. I thought you were here to hack off all the fat,"
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"chop up the deadwood before this station goes into the toilet."
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"No, you don't. So when do the back rubs start?"
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"You're an efficiency expert, right?"
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"Yeah. How many people are gettin' canned, and who are they?"
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"Case closed. You may go. And, yes, I must be Bill."
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"Hey. Hey. Good. Good."
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"then stick around to watch bubbles."
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"What on earth does that mean? Well, for instance,"
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"when was the last time we all hung out as a group after work?"
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"so I say let's just get out there and let's show..."
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"Okay, I have never said this before, but I think Matthew has a point."
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"I've gotta tell you, Bill, I'm so glad you finally decided to give TV news a shot."
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"What made you change your mind?"
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"Well, radio's fine and all, but it's strictly minor league ball."
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"I hear that. Uh, so, this is where we'll be doin' your test."
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"Yeah, I've got one at home."
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"Who's the man who once fell asleep at his desk for 36 straight hours?"
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"Who once tried to check himself into a rehab clinic..."
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"Well, that was my fault because I suggested it to him, and he didn't know I was joking."
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""I'm alive" before he passed out and slammed his head off the mixing board?"
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"the more time we're gonna have to play computer solitaire."
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"Hey, wait. You know, I wanna ask you something seriously."
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"True story."
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"Your shirt's just makin' it-- [ Gags ] worse."
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"You know what? My pants are clean. Okay."
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"I swear, it increases my productivity by at least 50%."
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"You're half naked. An optimist would say I'm half dressed."
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"Okay, I cannot go into it now,"
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"but it is very important that you do not strip nude..."
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"You got it. Okay."
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"you know, you'd just be insane not to use it."
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"Workplace inefficiencies. Oh."
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"Thank you. I-I think a little bit..."
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"of Matthew's inexorable learnedness has rubbed off on all of us."
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"Excuse me, Andrea. I was wondering if you could show me..."
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"I've got a plan. I've got a plan too."
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"Joe, I just wanna play solitaire."
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"So we're talkin', when we realize Catherine and Beth..."
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"and sets it off right next to them."
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"Then I must have the best job in the world."
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"Yeah, my father was very misunderstood."
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"Sounds like those people really love you."
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"Well, today's the big day. Oh."
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"Who to fire? Who to fire?"
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"You're not thinking of firing Bill, are you? I mean, he's the voice of WNYX."
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"Well, there's Catherine, a consummate broadcaster and a joy to work with."
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"Indispensable. I mean, she could be the news director herself."
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"Matthew, I guess, is off doing what Matthew does best--"
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"Yeah, Carl. Great guy, but not the best engineer in the world."
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"Um, what do you think of Matthew?"
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"but he couldn't handle it."
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"Then we're agreed. Uh-huh."
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"I mean, Carl. Fire Carl."
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"inched closer to achieving a bipartisan consensus."
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"[ Man #1 ] This is the weirdest thing I've ever seen."
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"It's the same setup we always use."
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"[ Clears Throat ] So, what are we thinking?"
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"There's always one guy people are tryin' to cover up for."
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"is to get Matthew off the field before he gets trampled."
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"I just don't know if that would be the most efficient thing."
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"Got ya. Over and out."
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"No. No, no, no, no. Let me."
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"Bill, this isn't a joke. This is for real."
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"[ Chuckles ]"
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"but I think it's best that I just give it to you straight up, man-to-man."
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"Yes."
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"Wait a minute. What are you trying to say?"
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"Wow. I'm really sorry, pal."
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"Well, do you even know why? Well, it's that efficiency woman's idea."
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"Everyone fought her tooth and nail, but there was nothing we could do."
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"Okay, that's good to hear."
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"Happy trails, Spaz."
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"How'd he take it?"
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"is the way you were such a good friend--"
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"So keep in touch. Okay, I'm gonna call you tomorrow, I promise."
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"No, keep in touch with Bill."
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"Hey, gang-- Oh. Hey. Uh, Matthew--"
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"Don't worry about it. I mean, I'm guessing you were probably fired..."
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"but Bill made me promise to give you this. [ Scoffs ]"
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"Take a guess."
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"Hi, guys. Look, I am a mess, so do not touch me."
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"According to this, this station is losing..."
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"and 15,654 times 12 months is 187,848, not 18,784,"
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"which means that we're losing--"
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"Well, I guess, three times as much money as we're bringing in."
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"Thanks a lot, Lisa. Let me put it this way, folks."
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"I tried to unload this station yesterday and no one would buy it."
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"Rupert Murdoch laughed at me so hard my speakerphone almost burst into flames."
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"Warning you? Warning-- I've been warning you people for three years."
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"What the hell you think I've been tellin' you over and over and over again?"
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"You have got to start makin' money."
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"Well, I don't know about anybody else here, but I am makin' money--"
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"a message that I think we all hear loud and clear."
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"- Am I right? - I'm sorry."
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"Thanks for the pep talk, but you're not back in Wisconsin at your 4-H Club."
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"Well, sir, call me naive-- You're naive."
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"No. Well, that's what I'm sayin'."
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"Huh? Now it's just a matter of figuring out who."
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""Planbee," what an unusual name. Is that Chinese?"
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"You must be Matthew. Call me Andrea."
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"Oh, well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Andrea Planbee."
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"Okay, now I'm sure you're all wondering why I'm here. [ Bill ] I think it's obvious,"
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"and I'm just glad someone finally realized the good..."
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"Um, No. Actually, I'm not a masseuse,"
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"but I am here to smooth out some of the rough edges..."
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