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Clips from American Dad! - Shallow Vows (S05E05)

"I already ordered some wine so we can toast to our future."
American Dad!
"There's a dog doing a handstand on the label. Stan, we can't afford this."
American Dad!
"Nothing but the best for my lady."
American Dad!
"That's okay. I'll just use my napkin."
American Dad!
"I had my retinas removed! I'm completely blind!"
American Dad!
"- [Gasps] - A toast... to us."
American Dad!
"Wait!"
American Dad!
"Ready."
American Dad!
"- He took his retinas out! - Does this story come with a dictionary?"
American Dad!
"- I don't know what retinas are. What are you telling me? - He blinded himself!"
American Dad!
"Oh. So where is the big dope?"
American Dad!
"Oh, for the love of..."
American Dad!
"So Jackson's grandmother went to law school in the '30s, okay?"
American Dad!
"Come on, Stan!"
American Dad!
"You are unbelievable!"
American Dad!
"I did it to save our marriage."
American Dad!
"Now that I'm blind, I can fall in love with your insides."
American Dad!
"When Grandma Ling was on her deathbed..."
American Dad!
"And I did, and it made me feel so safe."
American Dad!
"That's the most moving story I've ever heard."
American Dad!
"I must have told you that story at least 30 times."
American Dad!
"Yes, but this is the first time I listened."
American Dad!
"- I want to know everything about you. - Really?"
American Dad!
"Well, I was born September 26th."
American Dad!
"You're a Libra! I need to know more! Where are you from?"
American Dad!
"Do you have any children?"
American Dad!
"You're such an intriguing woman, Francine."
American Dad!
"Parking lot C."
American Dad!
"[Stan Moaning]"
American Dad!
"Oh, Stan, without your eyesight..."
American Dad!
"you've become a much better lover."
American Dad!
"Roger? What are you doing in here?"
American Dad!
"I just came to tell you that Jeannie Gold's business is ruined because of you..."
American Dad!
"and then I... kinda got caught up in the show."
American Dad!
"Well, tell Jeannie she'll get another chance."
American Dad!
"That is, if you'll have me."
American Dad!
"It'll take all of my Radisson points. But what am I saving them for?"
American Dad!
"A man? Ha! I'm too set in my ways."
American Dad!
"How much longer do we have to sit like this?"
American Dad!
"He's putting on the finishing touches."
American Dad!
"[Hayley] Wow, it's beautiful!"
American Dad!
"Yeah. I'm surprised how good it is."
American Dad!
"[Speaking Japanese]"
American Dad!
"Oh, no! The vows ceremony is tomorrow!"
American Dad!
"- What are we gonna do? - Valik's gonna kill us!"
American Dad!
"He's thinking of me!"
American Dad!
"- [Chuckling] - What?"
American Dad!
"I can't wait to renew our vows tomorrow."
American Dad!
"In some strange way, your blindness is the best thing that has ever happened to us."
American Dad!
"You're right. My plan was to get it reversed, but being blind is great."
American Dad!
"It's given our relationship depth."
American Dad!
"Now you won't have to spend all day making yourself pretty. You can take care of me full time."
American Dad!
"- What? - Except, of course, when you're at work."
American Dad!
"You'll be providing for the family now."
American Dad!
"- I can't be a provider! - Sure you can."
American Dad!
"Run the equipment sign-out room at a Y. M.C.A."
American Dad!
"Think about it, Francine. Management."
American Dad!
"You're not Filipino, so you can't be a nurse."
American Dad!
"## [Keyboard: Ballad]"
American Dad!
"Padre, stop looking so tense."
American Dad!
"You're stressing everyone out."
American Dad!
"You need to relax."
American Dad!
"You bitch! You left me and Stan at the altar!"
American Dad!
"You made fools of us!"
American Dad!
"You are going to apologize to me, and you're gonna apologize to..."
American Dad!
"Oh, for the love of..."
American Dad!
"Francine! Are you in the room?"
American Dad!
"I didn't get married to take care of somebody!"
American Dad!
"- I got married to be taken care of! - I'm not the bad guy here!"
American Dad!
"You're the one who doesn't want to be with me because I'm blind!"
American Dad!
"- And I don't want an ugly wife. - Well, l..."
American Dad!
"I guess I'm just as shallow as you are."
American Dad!
"I guess you are."
American Dad!
"So what if we got married for surface reasons? It works."
American Dad!
"You're right! Why fix something that's not broken?"
American Dad!
"Absolutely. We may be shallow, but our love is deep."
American Dad!
"The vows are back on."
American Dad!
"Not sure how, but Jeannie Gold is going to make it spectacular."
American Dad!
"I promise when you start to sag to subject you to risky elective surgery."
American Dad!
"And I promise to be with you only if you make money and stay healthy."
American Dad!
"You'll be dealing with that solo."
American Dad!
"I think you did a great job, Mom."
American Dad!
"I did when I made you!"
American Dad!
"Ladies and gentlemen, it is my honor to present to you, once again as husband and wife..."
American Dad!
"Stan and Francine Smith."
American Dad!
"- [Applause, Guests Sighing] - Move it along."
American Dad!
"Who wants orange? Root beer?"
American Dad!
"They were on the dashboard of my car for a long time. They are hot to the touch."
American Dad!
"They do not have dessert here, but I brought a bag of Chips Ahoy."
American Dad!
"Long story short, some of the cookies are wet."
American Dad!
"Everyone having a good time? Best wedding ever, right? I'm ruined."
American Dad!
"##[Soft Jazz]"
American Dad!
"Have you seen Steve and Hayley?"
American Dad!
"[Clucking]"
American Dad!
"Bye! Have a beautiful time."
American Dad!
"Mmm!"
American Dad!
"[Together] Give me some of that Frannie fanny!"
American Dad!
"Of course. That's why I've planned to, uh- to..."
American Dad!
"Who's that?"
American Dad!
"You must be the children. Jeannie Gold."
American Dad!
"While in your twilight state, you admitted your regret."
American Dad!
"No, I don't."
American Dad!
"Okay, here's what we're gonna do."
American Dad!
"What do you say, honey?"
American Dad!
"Can I help you find something?"
American Dad!
"Stan, these are my sons, Alex and Ron. They're in Columbia Film School."
American Dad!
"Then I wax my arms, legs and eyebrows..."
American Dad!
"[Heart Beating]"
American Dad!
"I don't want to embarrass anyone by making a scene."
American Dad!
"[Shouting, Groaning]"
American Dad!
"[Guests Murmuring, Screaming]"
American Dad!
"Stan, can you get rid of this fish corpse floating in my bowl?"
American Dad!
"- And you failed! - I wasn't in the mood to be tested!"
American Dad!
"I can't afford to go to the movies, so this makes me laugh."
American Dad!
"Committed to us."
American Dad!
"So I did the only sensible thing a man in my position would do."
American Dad!
"Then I'll be able to stomach your outside."
American Dad!
"- What's in this? It's fantastic. - I make this all the time."
American Dad!
"We're gonna go ahead and renew our vows."
American Dad!
"Mom and Dad are gonna love this present."
American Dad!
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