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Clips from The Simpsons - Itchy and Scratchy and Marge (S02E02)

"It's no trouble! I've got a garage full of tools."
The Simpsons
"Let's see now, here it is. The Complete Handyman's Bookshelf."
The Simpsons
""Volume One: Spice Racks.""
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""Pick up a hammer.""
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"Wow!"
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"Where would a child get the idea to attack her father with a mallet?"
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"So television's responsible."
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"They think this is suitable for younger, impressionable viewers?"
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"-Yeah, what are you gonna do? -I'll tell you. I'll write a letter!"
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"Please tone down the violence in your otherwise fine programming."
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"Enclosed is an autographed photo of America's favorite cat and mouse."
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"That's what we want them to do, Homer."
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"-It's time for Itchy & Scratchy! -Boo!"
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"Hey! Settle down, boys and girls."
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"Please, lady, be quiet!"
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"-Drop an anvil? -Hit her with a piano?"
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"Less violence in children's programming!"
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"I'm Kent Brockman. Welcome to another Smartline."
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"Hilarious. What's wrong with that?"
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"-Nothing's wrong with it. -Excuse me!"
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"Fascinating."
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"This is Myers with the writers. How do we end this picture?"
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"What's the problem?"
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"-Don't answer yet. -Sorry."
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"-You also get-- -I was watching that!"
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"You are my best friend."
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"It's a nice message of sharing."
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"Aren't you going to watch the rest?"
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"That's nice, dear."
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"-May we please be excused? -Sure."
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"That's Michelangelo's David. It's a masterpiece."
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"Come on, girls."
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"A masterpiece? Or just a guy with his pants down?"
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"What do you say to those out there who wish to suppress David 's doodle?"
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"Well, I guess that settles that."
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"A dash of rosemary, a smidgen of thyme, a pinch of marjoram."
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"Marge, you make the best pork chops in the world."
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"They're nothing special. The extra ingredient is care."
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"A sprinkle of chervil, half a teaspoon of turmeric and a whisper of MSG."
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"-I'm gonna build you a spice rack! -Don't go to all that trouble for me."
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"Hey, kids! I spy Itchy and Scratchy off the port bow!"
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"-Down in front! -Shut up, boy."
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"They fight and bite Fight and bite and fight"
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"I knew this stuff would be handy."
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"Not as easy as I thought it was."
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"-Dad, can you move your head? -I can't. It's broken."
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"No, Maggie! Bad baby!"
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"Keep her away! She's got that crazy look again!"
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"We were watching that."
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"You won't be watching any more. Ever!"
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"But if you take them away, we'll grow up without humor and be robots."
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"Really? What kind of robots?"
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"I heard about the cartoons. Tough break."
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"What if you watch it over at my house?"
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"Hey, that's just crazy enough to work."
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"You heard me. I won't be in for the rest of the week."
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"I told you. My baby beat me up."
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"It is not the worst excuse I ever thought up. Wise guy."
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"I wonder why the kids are late getting home."
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"-How come you can watch cartoons? -Because."
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"-Because why? -I said so."
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"-You said so why? -I'm trying to work."
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"-What are you doing? -Cataloging the violence."
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"I don't think adults have ever sat down and watched them before."
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"What kind of warped human being would find that funny?"
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"Dear Purveyors of Senseless Violence:"
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"I know this may sound silly at first..."
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"...but the cartoons you show to our children..."
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"...are influencing their behavior negatively."
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"Yours truly, Marge Simpson."
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"Take a letter. "Dear Valued Viewer:"
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"Thank you for your interest in our program."
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"As to your comments, research shows one person can't make a difference..."
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"...no matter how screwy she is."
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"-So, let me close by saying...." -"And the horse I rode in on"!"
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"I'll show them what one screwball can do!"
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"Everybody's looking at us, Marge."
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"How long are we gonna do this?"
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"I've never changed the world. I don't know how long it takes."
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"-lf people take an interest-- -Hello, Marge!"
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"-What is "S-N-U-H"? -Snuh."
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"It's "Springfieldians for Nonviolence, Understanding and Helping.""
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"I can protect my kids, but many others are being warped each afternoon."
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"That reminds me. I've got to get to Milhouse's to play."
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"-All right. -I'm going to Janey's."
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"We'll be making the most of our childhood years."
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"-Have fun. -We will."
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"What happens when a child has insanely violent role models like these?"
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"The answer is all around you."
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"How many of you were hit with mallets last week?"
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"I didn't know they made TV dinners this bad."
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"-Can I watch cartoons? -No."
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"-There's peas in my cobbler. -They're everywhere."
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"-I guess I'll go and watch cartoons. -No! I'm sorry about the dinners."
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"-I'll make up for it. -Who's up for cartoons?"
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"-No one! -All right."
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"Tomorrow, how about making your patented pork chops?"
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"Sure! Oh, dear, I can't. I've got three protest rallies tomorrow."
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"Twenty million women, and I had to marry Jane Fonda."
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"Hi, kids! Guess what, Sideshow Mel."
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"Or Krusty will bring out his friend Corporal Punishment again."
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"Please, stop it."
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"-Who are you people? -What do we want?"
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"Less violence in kid's programming!"
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"-When do we want it? -Now!"
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"They're ruining the show!"
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"Stop! Please, stop!"
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"I'm trying to earn a living here, all right? Stop!"
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"That woman. That screwball, Marge Simpson."
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"We've got to stop her. How?"
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"Stuff her with TNT, throw a match and run?"
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"All your degrees and that's the best you can do? You make me sick."
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"Less violence in children's programming!"
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"-When do we want it? -Now!"
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"-When do we want it? -Now!"
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"Some of these are good. I never knew mice lived such lives."
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"So much brutality. I don't know if I'm having any impact."
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"Don't do that!"
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"Hey, don't do that!"
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"Take that, you dumb squirrel!"
The Simpsons
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