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Clips from The Good Place - Team Cockroach (S02E02)

"Because my ex-boyfriend lived nearby,"
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"because he was addicted to Adderall."
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"There is always another option."
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"You guys do whatever you want."
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"- I'm out. - No!"
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"My plan only works if all four of you"
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"- are on board. - Then you better get cracking"
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"on a new plan, pally, because so far,"
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"I haven't heard a single good reason"
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"All right, how about this? You help me"
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"trick Vicky and all those other goons,"
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"I can get you to the real Good Place."
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"It's complicated."
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"but yes, yes, there is a potential"
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"method of transportation."
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"I can get us there."
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"You, Mr. Diabolical Torture Guy"
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"from eternal damnation..."
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"and all that crap,"
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"maybe I can earn a spot, too."
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"We didn't deserve the Good Place"
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"based on our time on Earth."
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"Will they even let us stay?"
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"But at least if you help me fool Vicky,"
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"your brains don't get erased every two weeks."
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"suckered by Michael, another team meeting."
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"We figured out his game every time"
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"and now he's just trying a new way to mess with us."
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"Teaming up with a demon is insane."
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"But I think we have to do it."
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"Are you forking kidding me right now?"
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"to learn about right and wrong"
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"and apparently, I failed."
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"I want us to get better and I want us to stay that way."
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"I understand nothing."
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"Hey! Same here!"
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"I belong in the Good Place."
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"The real one with the good people."
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"Me and you're wrong."
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"Very well. I would like to speak to your manager."
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"Listen, sweetheart,"
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"you've only been in this timeline for about a week."
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"You did it only for fame or status or to spite your family."
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"That is utter tosh!"
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"I had my flaws, just like anyone else,"
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"but I raised billions for charity."
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"I was a good person and I defy you"
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"or anyone else to prove otherwise."
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"I never showed you how you died."
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"to really make you miserable."
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"But it's hilarious."
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"But it might help you come to grips"
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"with who you really were."
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"Do you want to remember it?"
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"Tahani Al-Jamil, social activist,"
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"philanthropist, neck model and now cover girl"
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"I have long dreamt of being one of the women"
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"A woman who... as you know... was offered the spot"
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"on our cover, but turned it down."
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"Is there a question?"
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"Kamilah is very impressive."
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"As you know, she released her debut album"
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"only six months ago and yet, the critics"
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"decided to waive its 25 year waiting period."
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"because I will be in Haiti"
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"another question about Kamilah."
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"Kamilah! Congratulations."
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"You have all the attention. Once again."
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"- Who are you? - Really?"
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"Good Lord. Tahani!"
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"You're a cocktail waitress now."
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"Honestly, I think this is the right move for you."
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"So I had to weasel my way in here"
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"like some common... weasel."
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"So I'm just an embarrassment to you?"
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"Is that what you think of me?"
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"Honestly, I don't really think about you."
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"Thing... just... ah!"
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"Come on. Come on!"
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"Come down to the ground where you belong, will you..."
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"- Oh, no. - Mm."
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"I died in Cleveland?"
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"I don't think that should be your biggest takeaway"
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"- from that story. - Is that really"
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"Just outshining my sister"
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"and gaining praise and acclaim?"
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"I mean, I did gain praise and acclaim."
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"Oh."
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"- Oh, God. - Oh, come on, now."
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"It's not all bad. Imagine you're me"
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"and you're designing a torture chamber"
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"I mean, you were perfect."
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"But I've always wanted to be perfect at something..."
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"I just never thought it would be the perfect stooge."
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"I want to do it. I want to become"
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"I agree with Chidi. We should team up with Michael"
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"and all try to build a better Tahani."
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"Great. Yet again, it's everyone against Eleanor."
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"Because everyone except Eleanor is an idiot."
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"Why am I the only person who clearly sees"
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"we don't understand the risks,"
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"we just wanna become better people"
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"and this is our best chance."
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"- That's what this is about? - Hang on,"
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"I have no idea what's going on right now"
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"but everyone else is talking"
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"and I think I should too!"
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"My job was to squish you and poison you"
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"agreeing to help me."
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"- That's funny. - We're cockroaches to you?"
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"Just being honest."
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"Okay, okay, okay, okay."
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"- All right, forget about him. - Oh!"
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"So whatever Michael's reasons for doing this,"
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"he's giving us the best chance to improve ourselves."
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"Okay, I have to admit, you're making"
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"a lot of sense right now."
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"Give me a minute to think about it alone."
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"- Gonna bail, huh? - Hm? No."
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"Why... why would you say that?"
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