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Clips from Friends - The One with the Pediatrician (S09E09)

"Uh, yeah, no, I don't think that's a good idea."
Friends
"- In fact, I think... I think he's dead. - Ugh!"
Friends
"Why does everything happen to me?"
Friends
"I promise, first thing tomorrow, we'll find another doctor."
Friends
"But I gotta get up early, and I'm not feeling well."
Friends
"You're not feeling well? What do you have? Rubella?"
Friends
"Because don't go near Emma, she has not had that shot."
Friends
"Wiener!"
Friends
"Wiener! Wiener! Wiener!"
Friends
"Rachel!"
Friends
"- Hey. - Hey."
Friends
"So how is this for our big double date tonight?"
Friends
"Ooh. Great. Just the reaction I was hoping for."
Friends
"Yeah, so you, uh, found someone for me? You didn't forget?"
Friends
"Of course not. And you'll love Mary Ellen."
Friends
"I can't tell you how I know this, but she is not opposed to threesomes."
Friends
"- All right. - Yeah."
Friends
"- So tell me something about my guy. - No."
Friends
"Come on, give me something. What's his name?"
Friends
"- Mike. Yeah. - Mike. Okay, what's his last name?"
Friends
"Damn it! Is there no mystery left in romance anymore?!"
Friends
"We'll see you and Mike at the restaurant in a couple hours."
Friends
"- All right, bye. Yeah. - See you. Bye-bye."
Friends
"There's no guys in there!"
Friends
"Ugh, it's impossible to find a good doctor."
Friends
"How do you know the good ones..."
Friends
"...from the ones who'll push their penis against your knee?"
Friends
"I know what she's talking about."
Friends
"Well, we've gotta find a new pediatrician."
Friends
"Ross was getting sick last night, and Emma may have caught it."
Friends
"- Why don't you see Dr. Gettleman? - Ross said he died."
Friends
"He didn't die. I just saw his daughter last week."
Friends
"She said he was fine. Her, on the other hand, botched Botox."
Friends
"Oh, great. Well then, I'm gonna take Emma to see him."
Friends
"I wonder why Ross said that he died?"
Friends
"Oh, maybe he confused him with his childhood therapist."
Friends
"He saw a therapist?"
Friends
"Wow, what was it?"
Friends
"Mike!"
Friends
"Yeah?"
Friends
"I can't believe I'm doing this with you."
Friends
"Although I did just end a nine-year relationship..."
Friends
"...so I should be open to taking some risks."
Friends
"It'll be fine. Follow my lead, okay? All you have to do is pretend to be Mike."
Friends
"- I'm Mike. - Nice to meet you."
Friends
"Joey, this is Mary Ellen Jenkins."
Friends
"Uh, how do Joey and I know each other?"
Friends
"Wow, if I had a nickel for every time somebody's asked me that."
Friends
"- From school. - We met in college."
Friends
"I mean high school."
Friends
"You guys go way back, then. So, what are you up to these days?"
Friends
"- Well, I'm a lawyer. - Mike, attorney at law! Ha, ha."
Friends
"- Actually, I just gave up my practice. - What?"
Friends
"That's the kind of thing you usually run by me. Ha, ha."
Friends
"I want to play piano professionally. If I don't do this now, I never will."
Friends
"Great. I like that better than the lawyer thing."
Friends
"Which is why I waited until now to introduce you to Mike. Ha, ha."
Friends
"No, that's not what I meant. Let's get you a cocktail."
Friends
"- Hey. - Hey."
Friends
"Looking for restaurant jobs for you in Tulsa."
Friends
"Aw, that's so sweet. Did you find anything?"
Friends
"They're looking for a cook. Actually, "cook" may be a bit of a stretch."
Friends
"They're looking for somebody to shovel mesquite."
Friends
""Slim Pickins"? That is so cheesy."
Friends
"Well, So Cheesy also has an opening."
Friends
"Heh, honey, that's okay. I know this woman, Nancy..."
Friends
"...who's a restaurant biz headhunter. She may know something."
Friends
"Can I say how much I appreciate you coming with me?"
Friends
"When we get to Tulsa, I am taking you for a great dinner at Slim Pickins."
Friends
"Whole Hog?"
Friends
"It's gonna be tough to keep kosher in Tulsa."
Friends
"Hi, Nancy? Hi, it's Monica Geller."
Friends
"I'm good. Listen, I'm looking for a job in Tulsa."
Friends
"Yeah, well, my husband's been relocated. Ha, ha."
Friends
"Because I love him."
Friends
"No, I don't want a job in New York."
Friends
"Javu's looking? Oh, my God!"
Friends
"He asked for me personally? Oh, my God!"
Friends
"Oh, uh, wow, this is really, really flattering."
Friends
"But, um, I'm moving to Tulsa."
Friends
"So, just, if you would tell Javu..."
Friends
"...I'll take it!"
Friends
"Hi. Um, my name's Rachel Green. I have an appointment for Emma."
Friends
"Dr. Gettleman is finishing up with a patient. He'll be out shortly."
Friends
"Okay, thank you."
Friends
"I think you just have a cold. It's definitely not strep."
Friends
"- Would you like a lollipop? - Do you even have to ask?"
Friends
"It's so surprising that you and Joey have known each other for so long..."
Friends
"...and I've never heard about you."
Friends
"Oh, that's, uh, because we had a bit of a falling out."
Friends
"Mike hit my mom with a car."
Friends
"- No, I didn't. - That's okay. I have forgiven you."
Friends
"Now we're friends again, and everything's great. Heh."
Friends
"Well, wait. Is your mom okay?"
Friends
"Please, we're trying to have a conversation."
Friends
"Wow, you're a lot nicer on Days of Our Lives."
Friends
"Days of Our Lives! That's why you look so familiar!"
Friends
"- What? - What?"
Friends
"What?"
Friends
"Do you not know each other?"
Friends
"Of course we do. He's playing a game we used to play in high school."
Friends
"We pretend we don't know each other. We played all kinds of games."
Friends
"You remember that one where I punch you in the face for not being cool?"
Friends
"Let me ask you something: How many sisters does Joey have?"
Friends
"Oh."
Friends
"Joey, why did you set me up with a stranger?"
Friends
"Because I forgot about our date. I'm so sorry."
Friends
"I'm sorry too. And just to be clear, I didn't hit his mother with a car."
Friends
"You are unbelievable. I spent so much time finding the perfect girl for you."
Friends
"Mary Ellen is really smart and cute and loose."
Friends
"Hey."
Friends
"Oh, who are you kidding?"
Friends
"You find some guy off the street for me?"
Friends
"God, this is humiliating!"
Friends
"I'm so sorry. If you don't like this guy, I can find you a better one."
Friends
"I'm out of here."
Friends
"It was nice meeting you."
Friends
"- Have a good night. - Mm-hm."
Friends
"We leave tomorrow, and you still have a lot to pack."
Friends
"You're right."
Friends
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