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Clips from The Office - Sexual Harassment (S02E02)

"and Packer told them that we were brothers."
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"Yeah? So Randall is nailing his secretary, right?"
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"And she's totally incompetent. Really? Here we go."
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"Buckle up! It's gonna be a bumpy one!"
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"We're talking blonde incompetent, right? Oh, yeah."
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"Like, 10 words a minute? Talking?"
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"there are a lot of dumb people out there. Right. They are women, right?"
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"Come on, I said it."
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"And then suddenly, for no reason,"
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"this bimbo blows the whistle on the whole thing just to be a bitch."
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"What'd I tell you about the bleep button?"
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"Meant to ask you, can you think you can get somebody to drive me around"
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"Bad boy."
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"Ryan?"
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"Man, that Todd Packer can do anything. Except pass that Breathalyzer."
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"You a big William Hung fan?"
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"Why does everybody ask me that? Who the hell is that?"
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"My mom is coming in to visit."
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"She lives, like, two hours away, and she doesn't have a cell phone."
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"Which is cool, 'cause it's kind of adding some suspense to my day,"
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"and I keep looking over at the door, hoping she'll walk in."
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"I'm going to forward it like it's hot."
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"Forward it like it's hot, forward it like it's hot."
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"Michael?"
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"Yes, Toby?"
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"Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate."
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"Also, he's divorced, so he's really not a part of his family."
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"The full story is that Randall resigned because of sexual harassment."
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"No. No, Toby, no."
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"It's really not a big deal. It is a big deal."
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"It's a big deal."
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"What are we supposed to do, scrutinize every little thing"
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"we say and do all day?"
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"I mean, come on."
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"And then, corporate is gonna send in a lawyer..."
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"What? He... No."
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"Okay, what is a lawyer gonna come in and tell us?"
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"To not send out hilarious e- mails? Or not tell jokes?"
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"Maybe not some of them, maybe not inappropriate ones."
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"Everyone. Hello, everyone? Hi."
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"Sorry to interrupt, I know you're all busy,"
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"and the last thing you want is for a major interruption."
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"Corporate would like us to do a five-minute review"
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"of the company's sexual harassment policy, so I'll go over that later."
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"I wish you luck, Toby, I really do."
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"And I just can't wait to see how you handle it."
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"A guy goes to a $5 lady of the night"
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"And the woman says,"
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"What did you expect, lobster?"
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"This is what's at stake."
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"I'm heading down to the warehouse, where jokes are born."
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"And it needs to be just killer."
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"And it does not need to be clean."
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"So what you got?"
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"Like, a joke, a knock-knock joke?"
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"Yeah, no, well, I mean, better. Better than that."
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"Well..."
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"Those are some awful tight pants you have on."
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"Boys R Us."
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"All right, all right, well, good, yeah, but you know,"
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"a joke, but not necessarily at my expense."
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"Hey, hey. What?"
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"I don't feel bad. I think he feels bad."
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"Okay. 'Cause it's a little package."
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"You look good in those pants. He gets it from his mama."
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"So remember, intent is irrelevant. And that's it."
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"MILF."
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"Usually, the day we talk about sexual harassment"
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"is the day that everyone harasses me as a joke."
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"She's coming in today,"
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"Great point. Thank you."
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"In fact, basic rule of thumb, let's just act every day like Pam's mom is coming in."
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"If anybody has any questions about anything, you know where I sit in the back."
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"No. I can go over it with you."
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"I know, I know, it's good."
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"Albeit bored."
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"Do you realize what we're losing? Seriously."
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"Centerfold in the Catholic schoolgirl's outfit?"
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"I mean, it is hot, it is sexy, and it turns him on."
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"But what? Are we gonna just take it away?"
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"What about office romance?"
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"So let's just try to avoid them, but"
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"Yeah, Meredith."
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"Yes. She would have definitely slept with me."
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"She wasn't that hot. Yes, she was."
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"Okay, you know, Michael... Damn it, Kevin."
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"She's nice, she's shy, she's actually here if you wanna meet her."
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"I told you that you'd be on camera. I'm sorry, she's European."
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"No, I told you that you'd be on camera."
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"What if Pam was a lesbian?"
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"Well, that would be... At home?"
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"Okay, I'm lost. Okay."
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"Okay, we'll use the doll."
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"I wish Todd Packer was here, 'cause he would love this."
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"I wonder if anybody else would like to join us?"
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"Hey!"
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"We have to watch Toby's video that he's showing us,"
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"in order to brainwash us,"
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"Gonna be fun. Got microwave pizza. What do you say?"
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"That's what she said."
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"Pam?"
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"No, but, okay, well, suit yourself."
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"You said that we could come to you if we had any questions."
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"Sure."
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"Where is the clitoris?"
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"and Dwight was asking about human anatomy."
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"You know, maybe when you get really comfortable with each other,"
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"you can ask for that."
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"Good."
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"Good. And... I should get back to work."
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"Okay."
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"Let's take a look at a couple of scenarios, and ask ourselves,"
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"Where is the line?"
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"The Natural Redhead."
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"Hey, Marie."
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"Hey, Joe, Mike."
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"Settle a bet."
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"Stop the video!"
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"We go... Stop it right there. What?"
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"I banged this girl right here. That's her?"
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