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Clips from Peep Show - Holiday (S04E04)

"to see a relationship counsellor."
Peep Show
"Right. And yet you seem excited because?"
Peep Show
"It's all gonna come out! The whole disgusting mess!"
Peep Show
"She'll wheedle it all out! It'll take hours to break me down,"
Peep Show
"where I'm going to listen to whatever you have to say."
Peep Show
"'Oh, yeah, here we are, the field of screams, the torture chamber,"
Peep Show
"You've got this wedding coming up. How are you both feeling?"
Peep Show
"'Oh, she is good. Here it comes. Let it all flood out just gently.'"
Peep Show
"pr-pretty positive."
Peep Show
"Obviously there's some tiny doubts."
Peep Show
"Mainly about the catering."
Peep Show
"Well, that seems perfectly normal. Sophie, how about you?"
Peep Show
"Well, I just wish I felt that comfortable."
Peep Show
"'Hold on. Is that it? Is that my go finished?"
Peep Show
"'Did she just believe what I said? What kind of counselling is that?!"
Peep Show
"Plus, obviously, Sophie mentioned on the phone"
Peep Show
"about the sexual problems in your relationship."
Peep Show
"Sorry?"
Peep Show
"Well, I just feel, I don't know, unfulfilled."
Peep Show
"- Unfilled? - Unfulfilled."
Peep Show
"Right. Well, l-l-I mean..."
Peep Show
"I suppose I thought that..."
Peep Show
"who find it difficult or-or-or even impossible"
Peep Show
"- to attain... to-to achieve... - No, I'm definitely not one of those."
Peep Show
"I'd say..."
Peep Show
"'This isn't gonna be good.'"
Peep Show
"...often, Mark, you ejaculate..."
Peep Show
"quite a long time"
Peep Show
"before I've had time to feel like I've started to enjoy our sex."
Peep Show
"Great. Well, I'll make a note of that."
Peep Show
"Well, th-this has been great, just a great..."
Peep Show
"Mark, it's all right, we've got 45 minutes yet."
Peep Show
"'Now, that's value for money! '"
Peep Show
"So good to just get away."
Peep Show
"Oh, yeah. The stag aquatic."
Peep Show
"Actually, this is almost top speed."
Peep Show
"What if we hit trouble?"
Peep Show
"I don't think we'll hit trouble on the Shropshire Union Canal."
Peep Show
"Right, but this is just it? This is totally it?"
Peep Show
"Jez, it's ten in the morning!"
Peep Show
"What else are we gonna do? Freeze our nuts off talking to each other?"
Peep Show
"What the hell are we gonna talk about?"
Peep Show
"I dunno! Stuff! Banter. Chat."
Peep Show
"Isn't that what you had in mind when you organised this thing?"
Peep Show
"Sure. Yeah."
Peep Show
"So how do you feel now the wedding's back on track?"
Peep Show
"Not that."
Peep Show
"Right, not that! Well, what then?"
Peep Show
"I can't think of anything to say. You start."
Peep Show
"Hey, is that a kingfisher?"
Peep Show
"For God's sake! If we're gonna talk,"
Peep Show
"(Mark) 'Urgh, films. Another hour of my life gone"
Peep Show
"(Jez) 'This weekend is gonna be one massive dry hump."
Peep Show
"'where we actually try to fuck each other.'"
Peep Show
"Jeremy, you promised you'd play with apparent enthusiasm."
Peep Show
"Yeah, well, I'm sorry."
Peep Show
"You can so tell this game is over a thousand years old."
Peep Show
"Yes, it's very sophisticated. It's your move."
Peep Show
"No, not because you're win... I don't even know who's winning!"
Peep Show
"No, Jez. If you drank my piss I'd feel violated."
Peep Show
"Oh, that is great."
Peep Show
"You wouldn't even let me drink your piss."
Peep Show
"I'm not trying to kiss you. It's liquid waste."
Peep Show
"You wouldn't let me drink your piss?"
Peep Show
"Why would you even want to drink my piss?!"
Peep Show
"What the hell made you think of that?"
Peep Show
"I'd let you drink my piss."
Peep Show
"Oh, come on, let's get out of here."
Peep Show
"Let's go and get you some sweet punani action."
Peep Show
"I don't want sweet punani action."
Peep Show
"Here, look, take it. And the horsey. Come on, man!"
Peep Show
"Couple of pints, couple of hotties."
Peep Show
"Two yards of ale, please. It's his stag."
Peep Show
"No, look, really, they're eating, we're drinking."
Peep Show
"They want it."
Peep Show
"People have a wide range of emotional states."
Peep Show
"- Like what? - There you go."
Peep Show
"Well, they might be feeling pensive or full of hubris, melancholic, amused or just numb."
Peep Show
"I'm very sorry."
Peep Show
"Why not?"
Peep Show
"(Mark) 'Oh, God, this is awful!"
Peep Show
"'It's so obvious. We don't just want to chat, it's not just friendly."
Peep Show
"Oh, apart from the British Kidney Foundation guy with the stickers."
Peep Show
"Yeah, right. Mr Freebie looking for a handout."
Peep Show
"Yep. So listen, what can I get you two?"
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"'Come on, Mark, turn it on! Play the game! '"
Peep Show
"Oh, naughty."
Peep Show
"You've combined metric and imperial."
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"You know, from mixing the two measurement systems,"
Peep Show
"a hangover of that kind."
Peep Show
"'You're a social freak."
Peep Show
"'Remain in your compound.'"
Peep Show
"just to fuck over people with iPods."
Peep Show
"We think it'll set us back two or three years, which is cool."
Peep Show
"So you've got a great canal boat."
Peep Show
"The... The mooring costs alone..."
Peep Show
"You'll have to excuse Mummy."
Peep Show
"Oh, God, no. Mum's dead."
Peep Show
"Mummy's just had lots of lovely babies, haven't you?"
Peep Show
"Naughty, slutty Mummy."
Peep Show
"So have you got a girlfriend?"
Peep Show
"'Technically, a fiancee is not a girlfriend.'"
Peep Show
"You know not... not really."
Peep Show
"I had a boyfriend till last month. He was a bit hippy for my taste."
Peep Show
"Plus a lot of umming and ahhing. So one day I turned round to him"
Peep Show
"and I said, "Benny, it's time to shit or get off the pot.""
Peep Show
"Oh, right, and did he?"
Peep Show
"Luce, will you give me a hand looking for the secret bottle of voddie?"
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"'Oh, God, vodka! It'll be an orgy."
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"'Great! Disappoint three people instead of just one! '"
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"This is going great. Things are going to happen."
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"Nothing's happening."
Peep Show
"You're allowed a freebie on the stag, like Pedge in Estonia."
Peep Show
"When he had sex with a prostitute"
Peep Show
"It's what people do. Just get on with it."
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"I don't like her! I don't fancy her!"
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"Do you think Pedge fancied that hooker? Of course he didn't!"
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"He didn't let that stop him. He did the right thing."
Peep Show
"You can't. There are two of them, there has to be two of us."
Peep Show
"- I'm gonna go to bed. - You're not going anywhere."
Peep Show
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