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Clips from Kevin Can Wait - Kevin vs. The Dutch Elm (S01E01)

"Moron, moron, wait for my signal."
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay."
Kevin Can Wait
"What's going on? We got the storm coming."
Kevin Can Wait
"I-I... You know what? Just give me a second, okay?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Look... They carved their initials in it."
Kevin Can Wait
"Honey, no."
Kevin Can Wait
"Thank you."
Kevin Can Wait
"But just..."
Kevin Can Wait
"All right."
Kevin Can Wait
"Roger that!"
Kevin Can Wait
"No!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Anything else you want me to take care of?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Mm."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh."
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, Mom, if you're gonna start juicing,"
Kevin Can Wait
"you still got to hit the weight room."
Kevin Can Wait
"Whoa. He's gonna let you do that?"
Kevin Can Wait
"we're gonna do things a little differently."
Kevin Can Wait
"Like an animal."
Kevin Can Wait
"No."
Kevin Can Wait
"before he even wakes up."
Kevin Can Wait
"Honey?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Honey?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Ow!"
Kevin Can Wait
"so you wouldn't faint when you saw the needle."
Kevin Can Wait
"- What? - Ow."
Kevin Can Wait
"All right, babe. I'll see you later."
Kevin Can Wait
"Where are you going?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, once every five years,"
Kevin Can Wait
"It is just layers..."
Kevin Can Wait
"Graham cracker, chocolate pudding,"
Kevin Can Wait
"graham cracker, chocolate pudding,"
Kevin Can Wait
"graham cracker, chocolate pudding,"
Kevin Can Wait
"- graham cracker... - Okay."
Kevin Can Wait
"And then, it's chocolate pudding."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, 'cause if I don't, you miss it,"
Kevin Can Wait
"then it's gone, and I got to wait another five years."
Kevin Can Wait
"to get the lion's share, so what do I do?"
Kevin Can Wait
"I show up 12:30."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Yeah. - You must care a lot."
Kevin Can Wait
"Um, quick... What grade is Jack in?"
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"S... Sixth. Fifth?"
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"Fifth? Sixth."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Fifth? Six... - Wow."
Kevin Can Wait
"No, it's fifth. It's Si..."
Kevin Can Wait
"Well, change your face expression so I can..."
Kevin Can Wait
"Enjoy your cake."
Kevin Can Wait
"Um... oh, and when you're there,"
Kevin Can Wait
"tell Duffy to bring his truck tomorrow."
Kevin Can Wait
"His truck? For what?"
Kevin Can Wait
"We're moving the pool."
Kevin Can Wait
"We're moving the p... Where'd that come from?"
Kevin Can Wait
"We talk about this every year."
Kevin Can Wait
"there's no sunshine, the water's freezing."
Kevin Can Wait
"I mean, the thing is basically a giant squirrel urinal."
Kevin Can Wait
"All right, fine. You know what?"
Kevin Can Wait
"You realize you've been trying to get out of this for years."
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, I think you're exaggerating."
Kevin Can Wait
"Hmm?"
Kevin Can Wait
"I can't move the pool today."
Kevin Can Wait
"My toolbox is missing."
Kevin Can Wait
"Goody's having a garage sale."
Kevin Can Wait
"You got to give me more notice."
Kevin Can Wait
"You know what it is? I just need a "Me" day."
Kevin Can Wait
"Mets are in the playoffs!"
Kevin Can Wait
"It's an inner-ear thing... No balance."
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"Okay, fine. I'll do it. I'll move it."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Thank you. - I just got to say,"
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"I am feeling a little something in my throat..."
Kevin Can Wait
"Enzo's grandmother's icebox cake."
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"It's been a good five years, boys."
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"I'm just gonna come out and say it..."
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"It's a little off."
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"It's a lot off."
Kevin Can Wait
"Not cool, Enzo's grandmother."
Kevin Can Wait
"She's 98 years old, blind in one eye."
Kevin Can Wait
"It's a miracle she can hold a spoon."
Kevin Can Wait
"I don't know."
Kevin Can Wait
"I'm just saying,"
Kevin Can Wait
"you promise you're gonna do something, deliver."
Kevin Can Wait
"By the way, what was with that, uh, text you sent me earlier..."
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"Something about bringing my truck around?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, yeah."
Kevin Can Wait
"No. Listen, I've been promising Donna forever."
Kevin Can Wait
"You realize what a hassle it is to move an aboveground pool?"
Kevin Can Wait
"What's the problem?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Just empty out the water, pick it up, and move it."
Kevin Can Wait
"You said that the tree is blocking the pool, right?"
Kevin Can Wait
"What do you mean?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Think about it. We're watching the game, okay?"
Kevin Can Wait
"We can't see the TV 'cause Mott's fat head is in the way."
Kevin Can Wait
"Exactly."
Kevin Can Wait
"No-brainer, guy. Tree."
Kevin Can Wait
"I keep losing mine."
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"The leaves, the lack of sun..."
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"That's all coming from the dead tree."
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"Oh, you will say anything not to have to move that pool."
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"B... Bel... I-I will move the pool."
Kevin Can Wait
"The pool... Moving that's easy."
Kevin Can Wait
"You drain the water, you push it to the side."
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"It's... It's like a kiddie pool. It really is."
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, but you think I don't know that?"
Kevin Can Wait
"because it belongs to Mrs. Hoost."
Kevin Can Wait
"Y-You can be a little off-putting. That's all I'm saying."
Kevin Can Wait
""Off-putting"?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Just because you're very beautiful."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Uh-huh. - Look, I can go over there."
Kevin Can Wait
"I can get permission from Mrs. Hoost right now."
Kevin Can Wait
"Are you kidding me? It's called conflict resolution."
Kevin Can Wait
"I dealt with it every day on the streets."
Kevin Can Wait
"when you've failed and you're depressed?"
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"I'm gonna be very happy."
Kevin Can Wait
"Boy, what a..."
Kevin Can Wait
"what a lovely home you have."
Kevin Can Wait
"I love the couch, the plastic."
Kevin Can Wait
"It's like having a pool raft, but inside."
Kevin Can Wait
"You could throw up on this, and 10 minutes later,"
Kevin Can Wait
"Ooh. That is a lot of, uh... What are these called?"
Kevin Can Wait
"- Hummels. - Hummels?"
Kevin Can Wait
"These guys are making biscuits."
Kevin Can Wait
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