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Clips from American Dad! (2005) - Comedy (S01E01)

"I just cut my hair different for a while."
American Dad! (2005)
"What is this about?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Just look at that- [ Bleeps ] with cucumbers on his eyes! Not a care in the world."
American Dad! (2005)
"no one depending on him all the time."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, God. This isn't about some unfulfilled dream."
American Dad! (2005)
"You're having a midlife crisis and you're taking it out on a future senatorfrom California."
American Dad! (2005)
"I will- [ Bleeps ] chop his head in two!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Butyou, you have a family, a son, a daughter-"
American Dad! (2005)
"and hired mercenaries to help his wife seduce another man."
American Dad! (2005)
"Let's go home."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Honey, haveyou seen my garment bag? - Right here. Doyou have my hand?"
American Dad! (2005)
"[Knocking]"
American Dad! (2005)
"Stan, my boy."
American Dad! (2005)
"I can't bump, George."
American Dad! (2005)
"- I'm leaving you, George. - What?"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Chuckles ] You almost had me."
American Dad! (2005)
"- It's like the time I told CathyZeta her mom killed her- - I'm notjoking!"
American Dad! (2005)
"I'vejust got other priorities."
American Dad! (2005)
"Butwe'll still be bros, right?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Whatever it is, we can make itwork."
American Dad! (2005)
"- I'm sorry. - Stan, I can change!"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Sobbing ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"Hey, that's right. Look at that. It's after midnight."
American Dad! (2005)
"Bye. Have a beautiful time."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Time for cake. - I get the piece with the rose on it. I called it. You heard."
American Dad! (2005)
"Well, whatever makes her happy. It's her birthday."
American Dad! (2005)
"I don't know. I thought her dream had to do with a muffin kiosk."
American Dad! (2005)
"I have a new dream now."
American Dad! (2005)
"You wanna know what it is? You reallywanna know?"
American Dad! (2005)
"And everybody's buying it!"
American Dad! (2005)
"and watch him cry until his eyeballs bleed."
American Dad! (2005)
"Thank God. Our hotel room. I can't wait to I ie down."
American Dad! (2005)
"What is this?"
American Dad! (2005)
"- without a crack squad of murderers and thieves. - [Man Clears Throat]"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Coughing ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"we are positioned directly across the street from Clooney's hotel."
American Dad! (2005)
"What do the Coen brothers see in him? [ Grunts ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"Can I just say hooray for Google? It's made my job so much easier."
American Dad! (2005)
"Here is diagram."
American Dad! (2005)
"Ladies, take a memo. "Boing!""
American Dad! (2005)
"Have some ofthe squash Rebecca made."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, really? Thankyou."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Areyou sure it's her, Stan? - I'm sure."
American Dad! (2005)
"- This is it. - Thanks, amigo."
American Dad! (2005)
"You were great, honey."
American Dad! (2005)
"That wayyou'll always have video ofhim weeping like a little girl."
American Dad! (2005)
"Hey, bros before hos."
American Dad! (2005)
"- [Francine Exhaling] - Honey, I can explain. It's not how it looks."
American Dad! (2005)
"Damn it, you got him all wrong, Francine. He's the greatest guy in the world."
American Dad! (2005)
"- [ Ringing ] - Hello. Oh, hey, Dad."
American Dad! (2005)
"Midlife crisis? Wait. Future senator?"
American Dad! (2005)
"I'll be right back. I... have some unfinished business."
American Dad! (2005)
"Over here. Francine, give us a smile."
American Dad! (2005)
"Francine, I'm sorry, but that's the craziest..."
American Dad! (2005)
"And when you say "children," I hear "migrant workers.""
American Dad! (2005)
"I've enlisted him to help you get inside Clooney's head."
American Dad! (2005)
"Roger, I am sick of sharing the house with all these foster kids."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Here. I gotyou a pipe. - Thanks, but I don't smoke pipes."
American Dad! (2005)
"- [ Children Cheering ] - Hooray! We're gonna go home! But we don't have a home!"
American Dad! (2005)
"but I'll be staying a little while longer."
American Dad! (2005)
"Francine, don'tyou see? Sure, Clooney has no cares, no one that depends on him..."
American Dad! (2005)
"Mm-hmm. And what did Mom mean that her dream died?"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Electrical Cracking ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"Just halfa cup. I'm not that thirsty."
American Dad! (2005)
"[Man ] Entrare."
American Dad! (2005)
"First, though he has never fallen in love, he believes in love at first sight."
American Dad! (2005)
"That knuckle-dragging son of a bitch!"
American Dad! (2005)
"I'd help save these poor kids from you."
American Dad! (2005)
"Excuse me, Mr. Clooney. I'm Stan, your new bodyguard."
American Dad! (2005)
"Speaking of presents, thanks again for my meerschaum bent dimple."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Water break, boss? - Oh, honey, don't call me boss."
American Dad! (2005)
"- I'm leaving. - What doyou mean? Where?"
American Dad! (2005)
"You should get that cough checked out. Costco has doctors now."
American Dad! (2005)
"we have to go to him."
American Dad! (2005)
"Great.Just charge it to my Costco account."
American Dad! (2005)
"[CarHorn Honks ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"- You probablywould have let me sleep with him. - Of course. I assumed you did."
American Dad! (2005)
"## [ Chorus Singing]"
American Dad! (2005)
"He just does the same cheesy move every time."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh. Cloon-tang. 'Causeyou get a lot of cleaver."
American Dad! (2005)
"Wow, Cloon-tang. From the look on your face, I'd say that's love at first sight."
American Dad! (2005)
"Hey, son, why don'tyou go inside and get some eggnog."
American Dad! (2005)
"is to destroy George Clooney-"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Grunts ] I letyou kiss each otherwhile I watched and this is howyou repay me?"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Car Horn Honking ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Screaming ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"That is the best practical joke ever."
American Dad! (2005)
"figuring I'd get a free sample at the end, but I didn't."
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm the luckiest girl in theworld."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, yeah? Then getyour own damn wine!"
American Dad! (2005)
"So the diamond smuggler is posing as an optometrist?"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Gasps ] That's KateJackson and Bruce Boxleitner!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Stan, what the hell is going on?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Explain these foster thingies."
American Dad! (2005)
"Just check in with the lady who hands out the apple sausage."
American Dad! (2005)
"But ifyou stay out ofhis ass..."
American Dad! (2005)
"[Metal Clanking]"
American Dad! (2005)
"[ Snorts, Squeals ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"What the-"
American Dad! (2005)
"- Hi, there. I'm George Clooney. - Mm-hmm."
American Dad! (2005)
"## [Singing Fades ]"
American Dad! (2005)
"Honey, I'm back. Turns out we didn't have any shaving cream."
American Dad! (2005)
"[Screaming]"
American Dad! (2005)
"But now I gotta know. What the hell, Francine?"
American Dad! (2005)
"No making school lunches, no grocery shopping, no cleaning the house..."
American Dad! (2005)
"He'll never know this kind ofhappiness."
American Dad! (2005)
"Yeah, it's in the cooler by the door."
American Dad! (2005)
"It's notyou, George. It's me."
American Dad! (2005)
"You know, I actuallyfeel sorryfor him."
American Dad! (2005)