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Clips from Friends - The One with the Blind Dates (S09E09)

"Thanks, you guys. Have fun."
Friends
"-Wait till you hear who l got for Ross. -Oh, yeah."
Friends
"-A teacher? -She's into history and foreign movies."
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"And she loves puzzles."
Friends
"You're ruining the plan!"
Friends
"-Oh, my God, you're right! -Yeah."
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"-How do you know a woman like that? -l'm not allowed to know smart women?"
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"-Joey? -We met at the library. l went in to pee."
Friends
"-So now what do we do? -Well, okay."
Friends
"So this is great. Rachel's gonna have a terrible date..."
Friends
"...Ross gets stood up, and then they'll realize how good they have it together."
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"lt's not Santa's plan."
Friends
"No, it's...."
Friends
"-Yeah, you know, it's not that fun. -No, l think we killed it."
Friends
"Well, l think l'll go downstairs for a while."
Friends
"No, no, no! lt's okay! lt's okay! l didn't go!"
Friends
"Don't cry, it's just a bit!"
Friends
"l'm your Uncle Chandler. Funny is all l have!"
Friends
"Okay, just so you know, l'm gonna be ovulating from tomorrow until the 6th."
Friends
"l don't do that."
Friends
"-Did you say until the 6th? -Yeah."
Friends
"Today is the 6th."
Friends
"l may have also served some very questionable meat at the restaurant."
Friends
"-Go take the test, see if we're okay. -Okay."
Friends
"l'm not working! There's not much to do around here!"
Friends
"Excuse me."
Friends
"ls there a woman waiting at the bar?"
Friends
"Well, if l'm still here in an hour, buy him a drink on me."
Friends
"l don't know if l should. l don't want to be drunk when l..."
Friends
"-Got stood up, huh? -lt's no big deal. lt's just a blind date."
Friends
"We're okay. l'm still ovulating."
Friends
"Oh, good, because as of 4:00 this afternoon, l am not."
Friends
"So let's do this."
Friends
"-l don't think l can. -Oh, come on."
Friends
"-Because of Emma. -Oh, my God, Emma."
Friends
"Oh, sweetie, l forgot you were here."
Friends
"You're right, we can't do this. We can't leave her alone."
Friends
"Unless..."
Friends
"...maybe we do it here."
Friends
"l mean, how much can she even be aware of at this age?"
Friends
"She's aware when we leave a room. She may notice if we start..."
Friends
"...canoodling in it."
Friends
"-Canoodling? -Well, l can't say hump or screw..."
Friends
"l don't know, l guess having sex in front of a baby..."
Friends
"-...isn't so.... -Horrifying? Scarring?"
Friends
"At that bed-and-breakfast, we didn't have sex..."
Friends
"Well, what kind of a sick bastard wants to do it in front of a deer?"
Friends
"Wow, everything looks so good."
Friends
"l think l'm gonna have the chicken."
Friends
"-You're really beautiful. -Wow, that's very sweet. Thank you."
Friends
"Well, l guess, then the joke's on him."
Friends
"Well, come on, Steve, let's not rule out nervous laughter."
Friends
"So, now, l think that we should order..."
Friends
"l have a lot of medical problems."
Friends
"l silk-screen T-shirts now."
Friends
"Really? What's that like?"
Friends
"...l live in a studio apartment with two other guys."
Friends
"l do like my hair."
Friends
"-Hello? -Phoebe, it's me!"
Friends
"l'm going to hunt you down and kill you."
Friends
"Hey, Rach!"
Friends
"This is the worst date ever! How could you set me up with this creep?"
Friends
"You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends."
Friends
"l don't care. This guy is a nightmare."
Friends
"All right, so he gets a little crazy when he's stoned."
Friends
"-He's not stoned. -Did he go out for a cigarette?"
Friends
"Well, our plan is working. Rachel's having a miserable time..."
Friends
"...and Ross is stood up somewhere at a restaurant all alone."
Friends
"Pretty soon they'll be back together."
Friends
"By the time anyone's figured out what we've done, we'll be in sunny Mexico."
Friends
"She's asleep. Chandler?"
Friends
"She's asleep."
Friends
"-She's asleep. That means we can.... -Yes. But we have to be fast."
Friends
"Oh, okay, l'll try."
Friends
"Hey! Hi!"
Friends
"How are you? How are you?"
Friends
"Where are your babysitters, huh?"
Friends
"lf it was meant to be, it's meant to be."
Friends
"We're gonna show you a good time. Sit and relax."
Friends
"ln fact, let me bring you a crab-cake appetizer on the house."
Friends
"Wow, free crab cakes? Well, that's nice."
Friends
"-Just get out of here, okay? -l'm sorry, what's going on?"
Friends
"Okay, the waiters have a little pool going."
Friends
"l wish l didn't have to wait to take a pregnancy test."
Friends
"You may want to get some more of those too."
Friends
"Where's Emma?"
Friends
"Oh, my God, where's Emma? Where's Emma?"
Friends
"Okay. Okay. l'm sure that Rachel came home early and picked up Emma."
Friends
"You go look across the hall, and l'll call her cell."
Friends
"You better hope we're pregnant..."
Friends
"l can't believe l'm crying in front of you."
Friends
"You must think l'm so pathetic."
Friends
"-Really? -Don't touch my coat."
Friends
"-What's up? -Hey, did you stop by here?"
Friends
"-No. -Oh, my God! Then...."
Friends
"-Why the hell did you take her? -Because you two were having sex!"
Friends
"We're trying to make a baby. Monica's ovulating."
Friends
"Guys!"
Friends
"Seriously, those sticks are expensive!"
Friends
"-l'll have to tell Rachel about this. -Please don't. She will kill us."
Friends
"Hey, l gotta. Unless...."
Friends
"Unless what?"
Friends
"Unless you name your first-born child Joey."
Friends
"-What? Why? -Hey, l may never have kids..."
Friends
"Look..."
Friends
"...l think l know the answer to this question, but..."
Friends
"...would you like to make love to me?"
Friends
"Really, really not."
Friends
"-Hey, what's wrong? -l just had a rough night."
Friends
"This is kind of weird to talk to you about this, but--"
Friends
"-Yeah. -l did too."
Friends
"But is it technically a date if the other person doesn't show up?"
Friends
"Oh, no. Do you think she walked in, saw you and left?"
Friends
"Why does everyone keep saying that?"
Friends
"-That bad? -Well, he makes T-shirts for a living..."
Friends
"...and he thought it would be appropriate to give me..."
Friends
"''Female Body lnspector''?"
Friends
"Now wait a minute. So they're gonna name their first child Joey?"
Friends
"Oh, so they owe me, like, three Phoebes."
Friends
"Oh, my God! Look, it's Ross and Rachel!"
Friends
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