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Clips from Scrubs - My Manhood (S07E07)

All right, Mrs Cropper,

"All right, Mrs Cropper,"

Scrubs

Man rumble?

"Man rumble?"

Scrubs

I go next.

"I go next."

Scrubs

No.

"No."

Scrubs

I don't care that you've been waiting two hours to be helped.

"I don't care that you've been waiting two hours to be helped."

Scrubs

Thank you for letting me think about it.

"Thank you for letting me think about it."

Scrubs

Anybody have an idea how we can calm down the clientele

"Anybody have an idea how we can calm down the clientele"

Scrubs

Listen, guys.

"Listen, guys."

Scrubs

Tell me about it.

"Tell me about it."

Scrubs

You know, for the dead kids? But, no.

"You know, for the dead kids? But, no."

Scrubs

On issues like union strife, insurance scams, baby wolf men.

"On issues like union strife, insurance scams, baby wolf men."

Scrubs

I said, "Excuse me."

"I said, "Excuse me.""

Scrubs

And... Hey, Janitor.

"And... Hey, Janitor."

Scrubs

"Rate Dr Reid's butt"?

""Rate Dr Reid's butt"?"

Scrubs

Yes, 9.2!

"Yes, 9.2!"

Scrubs

Thank God this hospital is full of white guys.

"Thank God this hospital is full of white guys."

Scrubs

The Board found out about my age

"The Board found out about my age"

Scrubs

It helps him fall asleep.

"It helps him fall asleep."

Scrubs

All right, I'll just do it in my head, then.

"All right, I'll just do it in my head, then."

Scrubs

I'm watching the game.

"I'm watching the game."

Scrubs

I want you to see this.

"I want you to see this."

Scrubs

You got to make sure the pen's right in the middle.

"You got to make sure the pen's right in the middle."

Scrubs

I know. It's awesome.

"I know. It's awesome."

Scrubs

- Get two. - I know.

"- Get two. - I know."

Scrubs

Nailed him!

"Nailed him!"

Scrubs

Look, I'll talk to the Board.

"Look, I'll talk to the Board."

Scrubs

After that, he had a ton of girlfriends.

"After that, he had a ton of girlfriends."

Scrubs

And besides, you are terrible at keeping secrets.

"And besides, you are terrible at keeping secrets."

Scrubs

We got to get another issue out before lunch.

"We got to get another issue out before lunch."

Scrubs

I'm kidding, Ted.

"I'm kidding, Ted."

Scrubs

First of all, that's a perfectly acceptable fighting style.

"First of all, that's a perfectly acceptable fighting style."

Scrubs

And secondly, I think you should ask your wife about that.

"And secondly, I think you should ask your wife about that."

Scrubs

Granted, it was during surgery,

"Granted, it was during surgery,"

Scrubs

but I don't need anaesthesia to knock your ass out.

"but I don't need anaesthesia to knock your ass out."

Scrubs

- Sorry. - That's right. Walk away!

"- Sorry. - That's right. Walk away!"

Scrubs

Thank goodness your big, brave man-friend was here.

"Thank goodness your big, brave man-friend was here."

Scrubs

How did you get Sam out of day care?

"How did you get Sam out of day care?"

Scrubs

So John has had swelling in his chest wall for a few months.

"So John has had swelling in his chest wall for a few months."

Scrubs

So you're pretty tight with your brothers, huh?

"So you're pretty tight with your brothers, huh?"

Scrubs

Are you pregnant?

"Are you pregnant?"

Scrubs

- It's his baby. - That was one dream, Carla.

"- It's his baby. - That was one dream, Carla."

Scrubs

Which half?

"Which half?"

Scrubs

I was reading your paper online while I was on the toilet and...

"I was reading your paper online while I was on the toilet and..."

Scrubs

- Yeah, I squat and surf. - Oh, it's the best.

"- Yeah, I squat and surf. - Oh, it's the best."

Scrubs

"'Lf I seem angry,

""'Lf I seem angry,"

Scrubs

"'I'm really just wishing people would give me a warm hug

""'I'm really just wishing people would give me a warm hug"

Scrubs

"'or pat me on the back and say, I'm right with you, man!"'

""'or pat me on the back and say, I'm right with you, man!"'"

Scrubs

Yeah, I did happen to catch that, while I was writing it.

"Yeah, I did happen to catch that, while I was writing it."

Scrubs

Ted.

"Ted."

Scrubs

Dominican snack, my heinie.

"Dominican snack, my heinie."

Scrubs

and who won that fight?

"and who won that fight?"

Scrubs

He did have to wear that goofy hand brace for a while.

"He did have to wear that goofy hand brace for a while."

Scrubs

We agreed that's how we'd raise our kids.

"We agreed that's how we'd raise our kids."

Scrubs

I know. I love it.

"I know. I love it."

Scrubs

Besides, if you start acting like a man's man all of a sudden,

"Besides, if you start acting like a man's man all of a sudden,"

Scrubs

That's it. I am a man.

"That's it. I am a man."

Scrubs

And it's time to prove it, once and for all.

"And it's time to prove it, once and for all."

Scrubs

With my adrenaline flowing and my pride on the line,

"With my adrenaline flowing and my pride on the line,"

Scrubs

I knew this time...

"I knew this time..."

Scrubs

It sucks to feel totally trapped.

"It sucks to feel totally trapped."

Scrubs

I feel alone, too.

"I feel alone, too."

Scrubs

The hard part is finally breaking free!

"The hard part is finally breaking free!"

Scrubs

- Calm down. - Get off!

"- Calm down. - Get off!"

Scrubs

So uncool.

"So uncool."

Scrubs

I'm gonna kill him! Where is... Move!

"I'm gonna kill him! Where is... Move!"

Scrubs

the last thing I wanted to do was be lame and hide in a supply closet.

"the last thing I wanted to do was be lame and hide in a supply closet."

Scrubs

That's why I chose down here.

"That's why I chose down here."

Scrubs

After all these years of putting on toe tags,

"After all these years of putting on toe tags,"

Scrubs

And you get tired of looking at dead ones, you know?

"And you get tired of looking at dead ones, you know?"

Scrubs

No, Doug, I don't.

"No, Doug, I don't."

Scrubs

I'm not telling anybody about this, all right? So just forget it.

"I'm not telling anybody about this, all right? So just forget it."

Scrubs

What?

"What?"

Scrubs

He did. But he lived.

"He did. But he lived."

Scrubs

It never happened. So there's no more touching me.

"It never happened. So there's no more touching me."

Scrubs

Knock, knock, knock.

"Knock, knock, knock."

Scrubs

Hello, is the real Dr Cox in there?

"Hello, is the real Dr Cox in there?"

Scrubs

He's embarrassed about having breast cancer. Most guys would be.

"He's embarrassed about having breast cancer. Most guys would be."

Scrubs

in front of the whole cafeteria.

"in front of the whole cafeteria."

Scrubs

Elliot, even doctors get self-conscious about their bodies.

"Elliot, even doctors get self-conscious about their bodies."

Scrubs

Baby, I haven't told J.D.

"Baby, I haven't told J.D."

Scrubs

How could you not tell your best friend?

"How could you not tell your best friend?"

Scrubs

Do you guys even realise I'm here?

"Do you guys even realise I'm here?"

Scrubs

These conditions are perfect.

"These conditions are perfect."

Scrubs

See? He's learning.

"See? He's learning."

Scrubs

- Get the clippers! Get the clippers! - Let him go! Let him go!

"- Get the clippers! Get the clippers! - Let him go! Let him go!"

Scrubs

Although, he could be. I haven't seen his full blood work yet.

"Although, he could be. I haven't seen his full blood work yet."

Scrubs

I'll never be surprised by the ridiculous behaviour of men.

"I'll never be surprised by the ridiculous behaviour of men."

Scrubs

I wonder if Olympic athletes have ever thought of that.

"I wonder if Olympic athletes have ever thought of that."

Scrubs

Hell, if it makes a difference, you can even take off my...

"Hell, if it makes a difference, you can even take off my..."

Scrubs

Damn it! Never fantasise while running. You know that.

"Damn it! Never fantasise while running. You know that."

Scrubs

You can't stay in there forever.

"You can't stay in there forever."

Scrubs

You gotta make this stop.

"You gotta make this stop."

Scrubs

And I've accepted these because to each of them there is a degree of truth.

"And I've accepted these because to each of them there is a degree of truth."

Scrubs

Fine, let's just crank this out.

"Fine, let's just crank this out."

Scrubs

Off you go. It's all up here.

"Off you go. It's all up here."

Scrubs

It's like wearing a muzzle.

"It's like wearing a muzzle."

Scrubs

Now she has it and her grandfather has it.

"Now she has it and her grandfather has it."

Scrubs

Men are always doing this to themselves.

"Men are always doing this to themselves."

Scrubs

That is so true I'm putting that on my answering machine

"That is so true I'm putting that on my answering machine"

Scrubs

Oh, my God.

"Oh, my God."

Scrubs

Lately, I've been feeling like less of a man.

"Lately, I've been feeling like less of a man."

Scrubs

with all of that remote wrestling, alpha male stuff.

"with all of that remote wrestling, alpha male stuff."

Scrubs

But still, you whooped me in public.

"But still, you whooped me in public."

Scrubs

So we got to fight again.

"So we got to fight again."

Scrubs

Yeah, I totally messed J.D. Up.

"Yeah, I totally messed J.D. Up."

Scrubs

I cut my knuckle knocking his teeth out, right? Check out the scar.

"I cut my knuckle knocking his teeth out, right? Check out the scar."

Scrubs

As I showed off the cut I'd gotten from a broken jam jar,

"As I showed off the cut I'd gotten from a broken jam jar,"

Scrubs

I thought about how complex the male ego is.

"I thought about how complex the male ego is."

Scrubs

that we're strong or even feared.

"that we're strong or even feared."

Scrubs

- This is brilliant. - I thought you'd like it.

"- This is brilliant. - I thought you'd like it."

Scrubs

to stop that Board from forcing you out of your job.

"to stop that Board from forcing you out of your job."

Scrubs

He'll get there.

"He'll get there."

Scrubs

I think you're gonna be fine without the antibiotics.

"I think you're gonna be fine without the antibiotics."

Scrubs

And you don't think I'll need a pelvic exam?

"And you don't think I'll need a pelvic exam?"

Scrubs

Do it with the gloves off.

"Do it with the gloves off."

Scrubs

Okay, either step aside or I'm gonna go through you.

"Okay, either step aside or I'm gonna go through you."

Scrubs

Then you go through me. You go through me hard.

"Then you go through me. You go through me hard."

Scrubs

Ever since Turk visited his brother last month,

"Ever since Turk visited his brother last month,"

Scrubs

All right, we all know the rules of remote wrestling.

"All right, we all know the rules of remote wrestling."

Scrubs

Last man standing decides what we watch.

"Last man standing decides what we watch."

Scrubs

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