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Clips from The Cleveland Show - Another Bad Thanksgiving (S02E02)

"My name is Cleveland Brown And I am proud to be"
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"Through good times and bad times It's true love we share"
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"And so I found a place Where everyone will know"
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"Oh, that's right. My writers are."
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"My sister Janet's coming with her kids."
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"What? I hate her."
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"I hate all your sisters and your brother..."
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"...and your mom and your dad and your children."
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"Liar. Stay somewhere else."
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"- Good. Janet's only... - Boo."
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"She thinks she's better than everybody..."
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"You didn't complain when I put in the Murphy toilet."
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"Diva alert."
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"So this is what big-city success looks like."
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"Come give your Aunt Donna some sugar."
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"...and get back to Stoolbend where there's nothing going on."
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"I don't think I'm brave enough to eat Italian. That spaghetti stuff looks like worms to me."
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"You sound so ignorant right now."
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"Oh, Janet, so good to see you."
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"You look great, make yourself at home and so forth."
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"You haven't changed a bit."
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"No tears, Cleveland."
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"...and which is the tuna salad?"
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"That's tuna salad."
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"Mm-hm. These are what's happening. Mm, mm!"
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"Hey, Cleveland."
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"Can it, Janet."
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"I've hated Janet since high school."
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"Doughboy. Yeah. I like that. It suits you."
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"He pees standing up."
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"I think I can change him."
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"I told you to go out the window."
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"- What? - Hold up."
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"Seasonal slam!"
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"...on this bigger piece of meatloaf. Heh, heh."
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"A lot of people would say:"
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"Ha, ha. Like I'm the first girl to get drunk and sleep with a loser."
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"...for an awkward encounter that I can laugh at?"
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"- Look, about last night... - Rob Lowe."
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"- But I have a hair appointment. - That's a lie."
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"Fine. If it'll get your fat ass off my back, I'll go."
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"I won't be needing that."
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"Crazy sweet."
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"Oh, Holt."
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"What? I think Brian's much worse."
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"Listen to the rest of these:"
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"Ketel One, Ketel One, Ketel One."
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"They went to Vegas?"
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"Mm, me too. Is it one of ours' birthday?"
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"This is just like high school. Always acting like she's better than me."
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"Well, guess what? I'm a diva too!"
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"And I'm the one who's gonna have fun. In Vegas."
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"We're going to Vegas!"
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"And we are going to have fun!"
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"Fun"
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"That would be tickets for two adults, five children and zero turkeys."
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"Okay, seven round-trip, same-day purchase, day-before-Thanksgiving tickets."
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"- Your total is $15,600. - Huh?"
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"Excuse me, have you seen a short, unattractive gentleman..."
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"Bro."
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"Let me be more specific."
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"I am so annoyed at Janet. What kind of woman just runs off to Vegas..."
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"...and pays no attention to her children's well-being?"
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"Payout ratio of N to the X over square root of N minus four."
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"...who's old enough to cash in this ticket for us."
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"Well, if you help us cash in this ticket..."
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"I'm Jon Gosselin."
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"...I worked a car show, drove a gypsy cab, walked through The Luxor... Yuck."
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"Even as we speak, I'm sitting here with the Las Vegas Police Department..."
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"Staring at a flickering computer screen..."
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"Luke Wilson, make sure no one steals my goggles."
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"Cleveland, try and talk some sense into him."
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"And trust me, being a father is a full-time job."
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"Think I like being grown-up..."
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"He's not some late-night host, or governor of South Carolina..."
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"We may not have much of a past..."
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"I'll sleep with you whenever I'm in town."
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"...creepy rape-vibe magicians..."
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"...my stepdaughter's Asian entourage."
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"I also want to acknowledge my teensy-weensy neighbor, Holt..."
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"...and my loosey-vavoosey sister-in-law, Janet."
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"...and then they'll have some decisions."
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"No, son, I didn't."
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"Happy Thanksgiving, everyone."
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"Right back in my hometown With my new family"
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"My happy mustache face This is the Cleveland Show"
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"I'm gonna have to change your name to Luke Wilson..."
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"...because you've grown into a bloated slob..."
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"Have you seen the pizza, doughnuts and hamburgers I made Junior for lunch?"
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"This will be our best holiday together since Yom Kippur."
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"Cleveland, we're not Jewish."
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"You have nothing to worry about this year, because guess who's coming."
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"Donna, we can't have guests."
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"When you gonna burn me them Glee DVDs?"
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"Shut up, turkey-clone."
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"- Well, I'm sorry, but Janet's coming. - Boo, boo, Janet, boo."
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"- Janet is my... - Boo, boo, Janet, boo."
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"- She's only coming for... - Boo, boo, Janet."
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"Are you done?"
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"Junior, you know how much I love Thanksgiving, right?"
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"Yeah, it's obvious."
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"Well, that's how much I don't love your stepmother's sister, Janet."
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"...just because she got all that money for having her foot run over by a city bus."
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"Cleveland, I wish you'd ask me before you start messing with the house."
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"- I'm in here. - Sorry."
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"Janet. Look at you with your fine self, and your fine dress, and your fine shoes."
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"You look fine."
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"How is Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill?"
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"Remember Dynasty? It's like that."
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"Oh, ho, ho, girl."
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"Hi, Brian. Hi, D'Brian."
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"Careful, boys."
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"Before I forget, is there someplace I can plug in my...?"
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"I'm sorry, do you know what a Blackberry is?"
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"- Oh, it's like a typewriter phone. - Mm, mm."
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"Ah, I tell you, it's so good to take a break from the fast pace of Tobacco Road..."
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"It must be nice not to worry about how you look..."
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"...or what Italian restaurant you're gonna go to."
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"Great to see you too."
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"Hi, Aunt Janet."
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