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Clips from Seinfeld - The Chicken Roaster (S08E08)

"We like to think we've progressed beyond a knife fight for a drink."
Seinfeld
"That's it. You leave and never come back."
Seinfeld
"How about we leave and come back in a week?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, check it out."
Seinfeld
"We got chicken places on every block."
Seinfeld
"He is The Gambler."
Seinfeld
"-Hey. Jerry? -Seth."
Seinfeld
"We have the down comforter and the cookware you liked."
Seinfeld
"Really?"
Seinfeld
"So how's your standup career?"
Seinfeld
"Good. As a matter of fact, I almost had my own show in Japan."
Seinfeld
"Big investment firm. We just got the Citibank account."
Seinfeld
"The meeting you blew off?"
Seinfeld
"...floss, Plax, brush, Listerine."
Seinfeld
"Yes, and we're all very impressed."
Seinfeld
"I'll be in your office first thing tomorrow. Good day."
Seinfeld
"-I don't believe it. -And I got a date with the saleswoman."
Seinfeld
"That's a date?"
Seinfeld
"By the third date, it's By Mennen."
Seinfeld
"Oh, the red."
Seinfeld
"They are shut."
Seinfeld
"Well, did you go down to the Kenny Rogers and complain?"
Seinfeld
"Listen, I got an idea. You're a heavy sleeper, right?"
Seinfeld
"Why don't we switch apartments?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah, that's no good."
Seinfeld
"I may have to drive that place out of business."
Seinfeld
"-Well, how are you going to do that? -Like we did in the '60s."
Seinfeld
"-Thanks, George, but I got it from here. -Oh, no, I'm in already. Come on."
Seinfeld
"Okay. See you."
Seinfeld
"Kramer, if I'm gonna live over there, you gotta take some of this stuff out."
Seinfeld
"...because you didn't want to see him again, and more sympathetic..."
Seinfeld
"Well, then you wouldn't mind if we took a second look around?"
Seinfeld
"Mr. Marbles?"
Seinfeld
"So I told lpswich I'd have the hat by this afternoon."
Seinfeld
"If I don't have that fur hat by 4:00..."
Seinfeld
"He sells Russian hats down at Battery Park, 40 bucks."
Seinfeld
"If Jerry finds out I'm hooked on Rogers chicken, I'm back with the red menace."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, I lied. I'm just an assistant manager."
Seinfeld
"And don't forget your steamed broccoli."
Seinfeld
"It's for Kramer, isn't it? I knew it."
Seinfeld
"-He's hooked on the chicken, isn't he? -Yes! Yes, now, please..."
Seinfeld
"...someone, honey mustard."
Seinfeld
"That's funny, because I happened upon him..."
Seinfeld
"He was buying quite a load of chicken, almost enough for two people."
Seinfeld
"I sure do miss my apartment."
Seinfeld
"You don't want to think about that."
Seinfeld
"I don't think you will. As a matter of fact..."
Seinfeld
"...I'll save you the trouble. I'll do it myself."
Seinfeld
"Mr. Peterman."
Seinfeld
"You speak Burmese?"
Seinfeld
"So did you have any trouble finding the place?"
Seinfeld
"...white-poet-warlord in the neighborhood."
Seinfeld
"Are you an assassin?"
Seinfeld
"So how do you want to do this?"
Seinfeld
"-What's in the bag? -Oh, that's-- That's a sandwich."
Seinfeld
"Hey, Seth. Man, it is coming down hard out there."
Seinfeld
"Kenny."
Seinfeld
"Is someone there?"
Seinfeld
"Mr. Marbles."
Seinfeld
"Adollar eighty-nine. Why is this $1.89?"
Seinfeld
"Why is there no haggling in this country?"
Seinfeld
"Not me. Everything should be negotiable."
Seinfeld
"-Restaurants too? -Absolutely."
Seinfeld
"Are you telling me there is no room to move on pasta?"
Seinfeld
"All starches are a scam."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, especially ziti, with that big hole."
Seinfeld
"Excuse me. How much is this?"
Seinfeld
"-A dollar nineteen. -I'll give you a quarter."
Seinfeld
"Get the hell out of here."
Seinfeld
"-Tell him 40 and no fork. -Thirty."
Seinfeld
"Deal."
Seinfeld
"All right. See? We got something there."
Seinfeld
"Kenny Rogers Roasters finally opened."
Seinfeld
"Hey, look at the size of that neon chicken on the roof."
Seinfeld
"Rogers can't sell chicken around here."
Seinfeld
"Well, I gotta meet Newman at the pet store. I'm helping him pick out a turtle."
Seinfeld
"-Try and stay calm. -Yeah, yeah, yeah."
Seinfeld
"Wow, what has it been, like, five years?"
Seinfeld
"-At least. -You want to grab lunch?"
Seinfeld
"I'm actually headed back to the office."
Seinfeld
"Seth, it's me."
Seinfeld
"What's more important than catching up with an old college buddy?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I am supposed to be in this meeting."
Seinfeld
"Blow it off. Remember Poli-Sci? How many of those did we go to?"
Seinfeld
"-All right, I guess I can go. -All right. All right."
Seinfeld
"-Hey, whatever happened to Moochy? -He's dead."
Seinfeld
"Is that right?"
Seinfeld
"Still don't know how you can call lunch with me a business expense."
Seinfeld
"-What do you think of the catalog? -Stinks."
Seinfeld
"There, we just talked business."
Seinfeld
"Great. Put it on the Peterman account with the other stuff."
Seinfeld
"You know what we have you might like?"
Seinfeld
"I'll take it."
Seinfeld
"Hey, you like?"
Seinfeld
"I think it looks very nice on you."
Seinfeld
"Elaine?"
Seinfeld
"-The Peterman account? -Why not?"
Seinfeld
"And some hair for my little friend here."
Seinfeld
"-You speak Japanese? -No."
Seinfeld
"So you would have done it in Japan, but in English?"
Seinfeld
"I don't know."
Seinfeld
"So, what's this job of yours?"
Seinfeld
"In fact, today was our first big meeting with them."
Seinfeld
"Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Wasn't that kind of important?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah."
Seinfeld
"-You use a water pick? -Sure. Water pick..."
Seinfeld
"So you go into the bathroom 1 1, you're in bed by what, 2?"
Seinfeld
"At the latest. Oh, hang on a second. I've got another call."
Seinfeld
"-Hello? -Good day, Miss Benes..."
Seinfeld
"...it's Roger lpswich."
Seinfeld
"Miss Benes, I notice you've been charging quite a bit of merchandise..."
Seinfeld
"Well, I am the president."
Seinfeld
"Nevertheless, the expense account is for business purposes only."
Seinfeld
"Well-- Well, isn't the president allowed to do anything that they want?"
Seinfeld
"No."
Seinfeld
"Good day."
Seinfeld
"Hello?"
Seinfeld
"Anybody?"
Seinfeld
"Hey."
Seinfeld
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