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Clips from Community (2009) - Advanced Gay (S03E03)

should not be judged by what he does with a fellow man's butt.

"should not be judged by what he does with a fellow man's butt."

Community (2009)

- Here's the kick. - Plus since that song came out,

"- Here's the kick. - Plus since that song came out,"

Community (2009)

Hawthorne Wipes sales went up 7%.

"Hawthorne Wipes sales went up 7%."

Community (2009)

- And it's good. - Yep, even had my own people

"- And it's good. - Yep, even had my own people"

Community (2009)

Hawthorne Pride Wipes.

"Hawthorne Pride Wipes."

Community (2009)

They may cost more, but they're gayer.

"They may cost more, but they're gayer."

Community (2009)

And I'm gonna launch these little babies

"And I'm gonna launch these little babies"

Community (2009)

Here's a flyer. Ooh!

"Here's a flyer. Ooh!"

Community (2009)

Greendale's first annual... gay bash.

"Greendale's first annual... gay bash."

Community (2009)

Wow, Pierce, congratulations on meeting

"Wow, Pierce, congratulations on meeting"

Community (2009)

the minimum requirements for open-mindedness.

"the minimum requirements for open-mindedness."

Community (2009)

Yeah, I'm really proud of you. You're growing as a person.

"Yeah, I'm really proud of you. You're growing as a person."

Community (2009)

Oh, good grief,

"Oh, good grief,"

Community (2009)

he's not supporting gay people. They're supporting him.

"he's not supporting gay people. They're supporting him."

Community (2009)

If Mexicans were buying his wipes,

"If Mexicans were buying his wipes,"

Community (2009)

he would have ridden in on a donkey.

"he would have ridden in on a donkey."

Community (2009)

People earning respect with money is the American way, Jeff.

"People earning respect with money is the American way, Jeff."

Community (2009)

Not that my father would have agreed.

"Not that my father would have agreed."

Community (2009)

It took a federal injunction to get him

"It took a federal injunction to get him"

Community (2009)

to sell these things to the Italians.

"to sell these things to the Italians."

Community (2009)

Oh, I see what's going on here!

"Oh, I see what's going on here!"

Community (2009)

In my psych class I'm learning about

"In my psych class I'm learning about"

Community (2009)

this thing called the edible complex.

"this thing called the edible complex."

Community (2009)

All men have to kill their fathers

"All men have to kill their fathers"

Community (2009)

so they can do something to their mothers.

"so they can do something to their mothers."

Community (2009)

I haven't finished the chapter.

"I haven't finished the chapter."

Community (2009)

What's that complex called

"What's that complex called"

Community (2009)

where you're wrong about everything?

"where you're wrong about everything?"

Community (2009)

Huh, sarcasm from the man with the mother of all daddy issues.

"Huh, sarcasm from the man with the mother of all daddy issues."

Community (2009)

Whoa, double diagnosis.

"Whoa, double diagnosis."

Community (2009)

Save some for all those poor real doctors.

"Save some for all those poor real doctors."

Community (2009)

Pierce, what type of cookies do you want at the party?

"Pierce, what type of cookies do you want at the party?"

Community (2009)

We have peanut butter or chocolate chip.

"We have peanut butter or chocolate chip."

Community (2009)

Rainbow, bitches.

"Rainbow, bitches."

Community (2009)

We can have peanut butter or chocolate chip.

"We can have peanut butter or chocolate chip."

Community (2009)

Well?

"Well?"

Community (2009)

It's pretty great!

"It's pretty great!"

Community (2009)

Tight seal, good flow.

"Tight seal, good flow."

Community (2009)

Kid's pretty handy.

"Kid's pretty handy."

Community (2009)

You get the hell out of here!

"You get the hell out of here!"

Community (2009)

Go on!

"Go on!"

Community (2009)

- Who was that? - You listen to me.

"- Who was that? - You listen to me."

Community (2009)

What you have is a gift.

"What you have is a gift."

Community (2009)

And some people are going to try to take advantage of that gift.

"And some people are going to try to take advantage of that gift."

Community (2009)

Promise me you'll use it for good.

"Promise me you'll use it for good."

Community (2009)

All right, I promise.

"All right, I promise."

Community (2009)

Good. Now, come with me to the second floor.

"Good. Now, come with me to the second floor."

Community (2009)

Somebody pooped in the sink.

"Somebody pooped in the sink."

Community (2009)

You know, we actually have a lot in common.

"You know, we actually have a lot in common."

Community (2009)

- Super fans. - Randall!

"- Super fans. - Randall!"

Community (2009)

Okay, now let's take a silly one.

"Okay, now let's take a silly one."

Community (2009)

- Okay, okay! - All right.

"- Okay, okay! - All right."

Community (2009)

Father.

"Father."

Community (2009)

We need to talk, boy.

"We need to talk, boy."

Community (2009)

Oh--

"Oh--"

Community (2009)

You are here tonight because you have been selected

"You are here tonight because you have been selected"

Community (2009)

as potential candidates for the Greendale

"as potential candidates for the Greendale"

Community (2009)

Air Conditioning Repair School.

"Air Conditioning Repair School."

Community (2009)

But why kidnap you?

"But why kidnap you?"

Community (2009)

Why put a sack over your head

"Why put a sack over your head"

Community (2009)

and drag you here in the middle of the night?

"and drag you here in the middle of the night?"

Community (2009)

Simple, we don't want you to tell anyone about this.

"Simple, we don't want you to tell anyone about this."

Community (2009)

And if you do, we don't want them believing you.

"And if you do, we don't want them believing you."

Community (2009)

Isn't that right, Black Hitler?

"Isn't that right, Black Hitler?"

Community (2009)

Your initiation...

"Your initiation..."

Community (2009)

begins...

"begins..."

Community (2009)

now, gentlemen.

"now, gentlemen."

Community (2009)

Hey, guys, I'm looking for Troy.

"Hey, guys, I'm looking for Troy."

Community (2009)

Oh, he texted me. He said he's fine,

"Oh, he texted me. He said he's fine,"

Community (2009)

but he couldn't say where he is. Oh, no, do you think

"but he couldn't say where he is. Oh, no, do you think"

Community (2009)

he's been kidnapped? Usually it's one of the parents,

"he's been kidnapped? Usually it's one of the parents,"

Community (2009)

and it almost always ends in murder-suicide.

"and it almost always ends in murder-suicide."

Community (2009)

- Why are you smiling? - I'm smiling?

"- Why are you smiling? - I'm smiling?"

Community (2009)

Well if you see him, tell him Jerry's looking for him.

"Well if you see him, tell him Jerry's looking for him."

Community (2009)

So Jeff, what are you going to wear to Pierce's gay party?

"So Jeff, what are you going to wear to Pierce's gay party?"

Community (2009)

- Nothing. - Ooh, they'll love that.

"- Nothing. - Ooh, they'll love that."

Community (2009)

Ha ha. I mean I'm not going.

"Ha ha. I mean I'm not going."

Community (2009)

It's dumb and I can't believe you guys are supporting it.

"It's dumb and I can't believe you guys are supporting it."

Community (2009)

Everybody, this is my father,

"Everybody, this is my father,"

Community (2009)

Cornelius Hawthorne.

"Cornelius Hawthorne."

Community (2009)

Oh, I always assumed your father was dead.

"Oh, I always assumed your father was dead."

Community (2009)

Just mathematically.

"Just mathematically."

Community (2009)

Well, mom liked to pretend that was the case.

"Well, mom liked to pretend that was the case."

Community (2009)

Hello.

"Hello."

Community (2009)

Minorities, jewesses,

"Minorities, jewesses,"

Community (2009)

That is inappropriate!

"That is inappropriate!"

Community (2009)

And maybe you'll give that more weight since I'm "white".

"And maybe you'll give that more weight since I'm "white"."

Community (2009)

You've got a wide brow.

"You've got a wide brow."

Community (2009)

What are you, Scandinavian?

"What are you, Scandinavian?"

Community (2009)

Yeah, Swedish.

"Yeah, Swedish."

Community (2009)

Your blood is tainted by generations

"Your blood is tainted by generations"

Community (2009)

of race mixing with laplanders.

"of race mixing with laplanders."

Community (2009)

Oh, my goodness, he's like the Abed of racism.

"Oh, my goodness, he's like the Abed of racism."

Community (2009)

Okay, since no one's willing to ask,

"Okay, since no one's willing to ask,"

Community (2009)

what's going on with your hair?

"what's going on with your hair?"

Community (2009)

Ordinary toupee hair is harvested

"Ordinary toupee hair is harvested"

Community (2009)

from the heads of the godless oriental.

"from the heads of the godless oriental."

Community (2009)

to be assured of true follicular purity,

"to be assured of true follicular purity,"

Community (2009)

while still identifying myself as a man of means.

"while still identifying myself as a man of means."

Community (2009)

I can excuse racism, but I draw the line at animal cruelty.

"I can excuse racism, but I draw the line at animal cruelty."

Community (2009)

You can excuse racism?

"You can excuse racism?"

Community (2009)

So what brings you here?

"So what brings you here?"

Community (2009)

I'm assuming it's not for your son's party.

"I'm assuming it's not for your son's party."

Community (2009)

Unless "segregationist mummy" is a gay fetish I'm unaware of.

"Unless "segregationist mummy" is a gay fetish I'm unaware of."

Community (2009)

the party's off,

"the party's off,"

Community (2009)

and we're canceling pride wipes.

"and we're canceling pride wipes."

Community (2009)

Stand up straight, Piercinald,

"Stand up straight, Piercinald,"

Community (2009)

when talking to the lower classes.

"when talking to the lower classes."

Community (2009)

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go find

"Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go find"

Community (2009)

a half-decent ivory buffer

"a half-decent ivory buffer"

Community (2009)

in this two-horse town.

"in this two-horse town."

Community (2009)

Oh, the party's cancelled?

"Oh, the party's cancelled?"

Community (2009)

I bought a cone bra.

"I bought a cone bra."

Community (2009)

Piercinald, please tell me you did not

"Piercinald, please tell me you did not"

Community (2009)

cancel your gay party because of your father.

"cancel your gay party because of your father."

Community (2009)

It's a business decision, Jeff.

"It's a business decision, Jeff."

Community (2009)

I took a look at the numbers, had someone explain them to me,

"I took a look at the numbers, had someone explain them to me,"

Community (2009)

and this is the way we're going.

"and this is the way we're going."

Community (2009)

I thought you said Pierce's idea was dumb?

"I thought you said Pierce's idea was dumb?"

Community (2009)

Well that's before it was being oppressed by a--

"Well that's before it was being oppressed by a--"

Community (2009)

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