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Clips from Married with Children - He Thought He Could (S03E03)

"You're a horrible little boy."
Married with Children
"I knew I'd nail you and I did."
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"Pat Garrett got Billy The Kid,"
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"and I finally got you."
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"My job is over."
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"Today is my last day."
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"I would have for anybody else..."
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"but I always hated you."
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"No."
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"It's the joy of my life to see you grow up"
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"like I always knew you would:"
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"a total and complete loser."
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"Today, when I get in my car"
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"and leave this place for the last time,"
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"I will be whole."
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"Your shame is my gold watch."
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"Just because I have a stinking job that I hate,"
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"a family that doesn't respect me,"
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"Well, that may mean loser to you,"
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"I know it's not going to get any better"
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"until I go back to sleep again."
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"get in my car, with no upholstery, no gas"
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"and six more payments,"
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"just for the privilege of putting cheap shoes"
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"on the cloven hooves of people like you."
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"I'll never play football like I thought I would."
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"And I'll never again know the joy of driving"
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"without a bag on my head."
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"But I'm not a loser,"
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"because despite it all,"
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"me and every other guy"
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"who will never be what he wanted to be,"
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"are still out there being what we don't want to be"
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"40 hours a week for life."
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"And the fact that I haven't put a gun in my mouth,"
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"that's what makes you a loser."
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"You see, you could've made something of your life,"
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"but you never followed through."
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"Like I always told you:"
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"And maybe if you did that just once,"
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"you'd be a winner."
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"As a matter of fact,"
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"You won't."
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"Yes, I will."
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"Now it's not easy anymore."
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"Well, Steve's parents gave us china"
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"Oh, yeah, the straw's been laid down."
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"Oh..."
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"Did you take these hedge clippers?"
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"I was a little younger than you when I got this, son."
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"loser."
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"Yeah. Eh..."
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"Well, the world needs bimbos too."
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"You're a horrible little boy."
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"Three days."
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"Sit down."
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"so now you must pay the piper."
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"are from the planet Krypton?"
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"Yeah, maybe, it could be, uh..."
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"Oh, here it is!"
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"I apologized, that was it."
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"not book cheats,"
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"Look, I know things look dark right now,"
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"Hi, Bud."
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"Hi, Kelly."
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"So, um, what's for dinner, Aunt Peggy?"
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"[CLANKING]"
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"This week, we've had"
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"You know, it's funny..."
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"So you think I'm a loser."
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"a whole city that curses the day I was born."
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"So I get up,"
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"to fight traffic"
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"you pudding of a woman,"
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"No, Mr. Bundy,"
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"Thank you, Miss De Groot."
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"Couldn't you just eat him up?"
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"You made me a promise and you didn't keep it,"
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"Right, kids?"
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"The children are terrified"
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"Can I have the books now?"
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"This little treasure was hiding in a box"
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"Junk? I got a lot of good stuff here."
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"Dad was alive in 1957."
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"I'm always here."
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"The book, Bundy. The book."
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"Boy, this brings back a lot of memories."
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"you'll be on America's Most Wanted?"
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"and treat each book like fine china."
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"with checks."
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