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Clips from The Simpsons - Lisa the Skeptic (S09E09)

"It's smashir time!"
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"Take that and that and- [Groans]"
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"I just hope medical science can cure me."
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"as angel supporters lay waste to Springfield's scientific institutions."
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"Ugh! I wish I'd never found those stupid bones!"
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"It's time to put an end to this."
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"- Bart, I'm borrowing your blue crowbar. - Good ol' Blue-y."
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"[Weeping] Oh, no! This can't be happening!"
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"What the hell are we gonna do with 10,000 angel ashtrays? [Sobbing]"
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"- I could take up smoking. - You damn well better."
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"- Bart, strip down to your skeleton. - [Door Opening]"
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"We've come for the angel, Homer. It's not safe with the unbeliever."
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"It's gone! We're too late."
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"Little girl, what have you done with our precious angel?"
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"Nothing! Someone must have stolen it."
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"Looks to me like Lisa Simpson found something science couldn't explain..."
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"- [Gasps] Hey! - What? She didn't do anything."
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"But in a larger sense, this trial will settle the age-old question..."
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"of science versus religion."
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"Let the opening statements commence."
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"we intend to prove Lisa Simpson willfully destroyed-"
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"[Chattering Continues]"
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"- Well, it didn't ride up on no zebra. - Look, a message!"
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"[Laughing] Hey-"
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"I'm scared, Daddy. Too scared to even wet my pants."
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"Hardly. Anyone could've written that."
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"Reverend, I've got to admit. This doomsday warning has me just a smidge twitterpated."
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"Oh, now, be calm, Ned."
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"Your Holiness, there is word from America."
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"Um, keep an eye on it."
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"[Mrs. Krabappel] This could be our last day together, my love."
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"How about a farewell romp in the Garden of Earthly Delights?"
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"Well, you might say we're going to the best steakhouse in the whole universe."
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"So we're not going to Black Angus."
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"Will you leave me alone?"
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"Please, Lisa. I don't know exactly what's gonna happen."
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"But I really wish we could make peace before sunset."
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"Nothing is going to happen, Mom!"
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"I hate to disappoint you, but the world is not coming to an end."
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"- Or-Or-Or-Or "Amazing Grace"? - Mmm. Nah."
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"We did it. We beat cancer."
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"- Muuuah! - Seven, six-"
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"[Others Join Countdown] five, four..."
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"three, two, one-"
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"[Collective Gasp]"
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"[Collective Sigh]"
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"- There you go. I hope you all learned a val- - [Male Voice] Silence!"
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"Rrepare for the end!"
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"- What? - Ooh."
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"Behold!"
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"The grand opening of the Heavenly Hills Mall."
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"Wait a second! You planted a phony skeleton for me to find!"
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"This was all a big hoax!"
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"You exploited people's deepest beliefs just to hawk your cheesy wares?"
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"Well, we are outraged!"
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"But look at all the stores! A Pottery Barn!"
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"And 20% off everything?"
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"- Out of my way, shorty! - Hey!"
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"I don't understand, Professor. Why didn't your tests show the skeleton was a fake?"
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"- [Electrical Current Sizzling] - [Excited Chattering]"
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"Uh, sir, about that, uh-"
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"that kiss- l- [Laughs]"
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"Well, I guess you were right, honey."
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"you were squeezing my hand pretty hard."
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"[Embarrassed Chuckle] Well, it was just so loud..."
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"and- [Laughs] thanks for squeezing back."
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"Anytime, my angel."
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"[Whistle Blowing]"
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"But we didn't enter any police raffle."
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"[Whistling] I'd like a yellow boat, please..."
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"Uh, right through that door. [Titters]"
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"- [Blows Landing] - Ouch!"
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"- Mr. Hutz, we won. - "We"?"
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"with a trip to an archeological dig."
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"I'd better sit down for a moment."
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"- [Whimpering] - [Snoring]"
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"[Wiggum] Hey, what is that?"
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"What is it, Lisa?"
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"[Muttering, Cries Out]"
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"Yeah, everyone's heard of angels, but..."
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"Precisely. Be sure to wipe your own memory clear when you're finished."
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"I'll need to refer to the case of Finders versus Keepers."
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"It's probably a million years old, Dad."
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"Then why'd you come running up like that?"
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"- But, y-you're an intelligent person, Mom. - [Pot Clanks]"
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"[Commotion Continues]"
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"Technocrats are learning a lesson in humility tonight..."
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"Your Honor, over the coming weeks and months..."
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"I find the defendant not guilty."
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"Wait a second. I don't like the sound of that."
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"But be afraid also- tremendously afraid-"
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"## [Continues]"
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"- [Cuffs Clicking] - Whoa! Yo!"
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"Ow! Oh, my boating arm!"
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"##[Singing Call-And-Response]"
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"It appears to be some sort of rock."
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"- Pay you a buck. - A buck, eh?"
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"I say it's the Angel of Mercy, you jerk."
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"- But- - Go home, science girl."
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"[Bell Ringing]"
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"[Mob Yelling]"
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"Howdy, gents. I'm here to collect my free-"
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"You can't stop progress 'cause of some moldy old bones."
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"- I think it's as valuable as it's gonna get. - [Scoffs]"
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"and I wondered if I could rub the angel with my foot for good luck."
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"We need a replacement skeleton, and we need it now."
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"[Grunting]"
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"A bottle cap, a shoe, a bar of gold- anything!"
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"- with a trip to an archeological dig! - [Cheering]"
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"Certainly. I'll have the results by tomorrow."
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"- [Whimpering] - The end ofhigh prices!"
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"- [Murmuring] - Shh!"
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"There. Now, could I please have my motorboat?"
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"[All Gasping]"
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"[Homer Shouting] Get your own angel, you moocher!"
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"[Crickets Chirping]"
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"Why? Why was I programmed to feel pain?"
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"##[Chorus Singing]"
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"[Stone Sizzles]"
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"[Snickers] I hope you brought your checkbook, wise guy."
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