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Clips from Disenchantment (2018) - Castle Party Massacre (S01E01)

"Sorry, Bean. I heard guys that go with you end up dead."
Disenchantment (2018)
"Who'd you hear that from? Get out of here, scribe guy."
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"Your hands were all rough and sexy, anyway."
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"Go! Go use them on yourself or whatever."
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"but I can't if they're all so scared of my stupid dad."
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"and wear it around from time to time, so people think he's still alive."
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"Yeah, just making murder plans with my cat."
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"I couldn't help but overhear your secret conversation. Mind if I join?"
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"Oh, you will soon, my sire."
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"I love living where I work. I never have to leave."
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"but is this what water's supposed to look like?"
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"Oh, why did I behead everyone with a medical license?"
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"People rarely recover before Saturday night."
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"Hey, little guy, if I find so much as a misplaced hair when I get back,"
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"I'll cut off your arm."
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"Okay, but not my lucky arm."
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"Which one's your lucky arm?"
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"Okay, fine, both of them."
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"but we mustn't let this grave occurrence weigh down our somber hearts."
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"We must carry on and take comfort in prayer..."
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"[laughing]"
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"Oh, I've got to keep it together until he's out of the gates, at least."
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"Wait. What are you guys doing? Zog said he'd cut off my arms."
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"Deals are made, wallets are lost, people hook up."
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"[whispers] Often the most regrettable hookups."
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"I'm gonna drink milk out of my shoe."
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"I already had milk in there."
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"I'll be doing all your body butters and light touching."
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"What are these clamps for?"
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"To hold you down while I talk to you. Now let me ask you a few questions."
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"Don't rattle the clamps. It enrages me."
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"with olive skin and an unbridled sense of caution. [chuckles]"
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"That's not what I meant."
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"But do you? Don't answer unless it's yes."
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"Dude, decide what you want, drink till you have the nerve to go for it,"
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"Well, stop saying what I mean."
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"Hear ye, hear ye! Where are my party people at?"
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"Aw, I think he looks cute, like the mayor of Babyville."
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"Aw, yes, you are."
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"[people cheering]"
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"[vocalizing]"
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"♪ Let's party ♪"
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"Actually, sorry, I'm late for a crusade."
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"[sighs]"
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"[snoring]"
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"[laughs]"
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"Almost everyone's dancing. [chuckles] I mean..."
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"[Elfo] 312, 313..."
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"What? No, it's just a regular arrow."
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"Well, I'm sorry."
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"Things get confusing in a world with occasional magic and curses."
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"Couple of wallflowers, standing over by the snack table eating chee..."
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"What happened to all the cheese? There were over 300 cubes over here."
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"[clears throat] Bean, Bean, Bean. [chuckles]"
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"- Um, well, can I be honest with you? - Yeah, of course."
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"Um... Uh... [groans]"
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"- I'm into big girls. - What?"
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"[stuttering] I don't if I'd say "dinky.""
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"could you ever go out with a guy who's dinky?"
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"Let's burn this place down!"
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"[all gasp]"
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"Woe is gonna be you if you don't..."
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"- This here is the feeling stick. - [stick rattles]"
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"Oh, no. Party crashers!"
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"Whoo! Horse at a party! Party horse rules!"
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"Hey, nice. She drank her way out of depression like a pro."
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"- Your tooth is beautiful, too. - Ah."
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"Um, please don't sit in the king's chair."
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"Queens either. Dukes kinda give me the willies, but kings? Bah!"
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"Welcome to my party."
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"[chuckles mockingly] Ugh!"
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"I don't want to interrupt whatever those four people are doing,"
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"but could you come throw a wet blanket..."
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"Um, this is me bed that me family lives on and..."
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"[whispering] Oh, so soft."
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"Ugh, you're still up?"
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"What? What's wrong with you? Why would you think that?"
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"Oh, hi, Bean. I'm not interrupting, am I?"
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"Mind if I sit on the bed?"
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"Elf, actually. Common mistake."
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"This is your room? You are the princess?"
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"Um, you can't kill me."
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"Your snowy hair and stormy breath remind me of my homeland."
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"No, wait! I was just trying to control you."
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"Oh."
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"- I am land king now! - [Vikings cheering]"
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"This is why you gotta make people RSVP."
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"Something in my voice makes people real mad. [sighs]"
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"and who knows what I'm gonna do to you now. [chuckles]"
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"I'm gettin' out while I still have my dignity."
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"What?"
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"I wish you all the gumdrops in the rainbow."
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"This shoddy kingdom is ours forever."
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"Eternity shall remember the names of Sven and, uh..."
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"- Bean. - Really?"
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"Behold, guys, the Elixir of Life."
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"Hold on. I didn't become regional manager of the Land Vikings"
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"Showed you. I have to show you."
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"Oh, oh. [gagging]"
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"Huh. I wasn't expecting to chew."
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"Right this way, gentlemen."
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"Luci, pull the lever."
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"[Vikings yelling]"
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"Oh, you shouldn't have said that. Here's a hammer."
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"[yelling] This is why you're still single!"
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"Wow! I can't believe you just sent so many people to their death."
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"Oh. I guess it was low tide."
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"Will they or won't they..."
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"if I don't have to tell you what happened down there."
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"Walking up stairs now. Landing neat and tidy."
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"How nice."
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"Glad to hear it."
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"Now I would like to sit on my throne and rule my kingdom,"
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"which most certainly was not overthrown by barbarians."
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"Hey, at least you get to watch the sunrise with a girl. Sorry it's just me."
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"Well, maybe someday you'll get your wish, too."
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"I have wishes, too."
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"[theme music playing]"
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"[man] Hey!"
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"[grunts] You sure this is safe?"
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