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Clips from The Simpsons - Bart Gets an F (S02E02)

"-He doesn't care, Mom. -I do. I want a beer while I'm caring."
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"Homer! Go ahead, Lisa."
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"I got an A on my vocabulary test."
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"You did! Well, that's just.... Oh, what a glorious day!"
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"I might as well kill two birds with one stone."
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"You covered up my paper!"
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"Look at those funny little whiskers. That reminds me."
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"It's Gorilla Week on Million Dollar Movie."
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"Gorilla the Conqueror. The granddaddy of them all."
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"Well, maybe just one more hour."
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"It's so unfair. Just because he's different."
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"Time to hit the books."
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"Burning the candle at both ends, boy?"
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"All right, let's take care of some business."
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""Chapter One: A Dream of Freedom.""
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"On September 15, 1620, separatists from the Church of England..."
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"...some living in Holland, left Plymouth, England."
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""Their destination was....""
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"Marge, come take a look at this."
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"The little tiger tries so hard. Why does he keep failing?"
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"Bart, you're gonna miss your bus."
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"Hey, Bart-dude. You look freaked."
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"I got a test I'm not ready for. Can you crash the bus?"
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"Sorry, I can't do it on purpose. But maybe you'll get lucky."
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"Okay, don't panic. Find an egghead and pump him for some answers."
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"I bet he didn't study again."
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"-Now he'll try to get answers from us. -He's pathetic."
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"-Morning, girls. -Good morning, Bart."
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"Who's up for a cram session? I'll go first."
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"-Name the pilgrim's boat. -The Spirit of St. Louis."
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"-Why'd they leave England? -Giant rats."
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"Cool, history's coming alive."
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"I don't know why I should care..."
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"...but the information that you just received is erroneous."
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"You're saying--"
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"A blindfolded chimp with a pencil in his teeth has more chances than you."
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"Thanks for the pep talk."
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"All right, take one and pass the rest back."
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"Think, Simpson! Crisis brings out the best in you."
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"-What is it, Bart? -Nothing. Must. Take. Test."
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"-What's the matter, son? -Stabbing pains in my stomach."
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"Oh, dear, I've heard of this."
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"-Do you feel pain in your arm? -Both arms."
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"-Temporary loss of vision? -Who said that? Come closer."
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"Yes, dear?"
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"Your third bowl. I think you're on the mend."
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"Anything else I can get you?"
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"-Perhaps the TV? -Of course. Homer!"
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"What?"
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"I wish I had amoria phlebitis."
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"-You'll still fail that test. -I've got my bases covered."
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"Milhouse, what'd I miss today?"
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"Richard laughed milk through his nose."
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"What about that history test? Piece of cake?"
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"What'd you get for number one?"
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"Number two? Yeah, that sounds right."
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"Here you go, Mrs. Krabappel. You'll be pleasantly surprised."
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"This test is worse than Milhouse's!"
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"Bart, I warned you. This is the final straw!"
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"You know our district psychiatrist, Dr. J. Loren Pryor."
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"Hey, Dr. J."
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"This is a classic case of what laymen refer to as "fear of failure.""
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"Bart is an underachiever, yet he seems to be...."
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"How should I put this? Proud of it."
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"One of his problems is a short attention span."
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"Blah, blah, blah."
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"Bart failed his last four exams. Is there anything you haven't told us?"
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"Everyone else in the class has shown some improvement."
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"-Yet you continue to struggle. Why? -I don't know."
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"Look at these results: 55, 42, 26. A 12 on state capitals!"
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"Why are we dancing around the obvious?"
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"We all know it. I'm dumb as a post."
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"-Think I'm happy? -You're just a late bloomer."
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"As emotionally crippling as it may be, my recommendation is for Bart to..."
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"...repeat the fourth grade."
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"-You can't! I'll do better! -That'll be the day."
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"Maybe it would help him to be left back. It won't be so bad."
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"You can't hold me back. I swear I'll do better."
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"Look in my eyes. See the sincerity? See the fear?"
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"As God is my witness, I can pass the fourth grade!"
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"If not, at least you'll be bigger than the other kids."
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"Get off the bus and forever hold your peace, little dudes."
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"Otto, I respect you. You let us throw stuff at cars and try to tip the bus."
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"Damn thing never goes over, does it? So what's in your head?"
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"I've been failing a lot of tests recently."
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"They'll hold me back if I don't shape up."
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"That's it? Relax, man. It could be the best thing to happen to you."
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"And look at me, man. Now I drive the school bus!"
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"My recommendation is for Bart to repeat the fourth grade."
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"All right, class, the topic is world literature."
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"I got a peptic ulcer, my wife wants a new car and I need a root canal."
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"-Quit bugging me about the pirate. -Long John Silver, Dad."
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"I heard that, Bart Jr. I want to see both of you after class."
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"Thanks a lot, son."
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"Yo, little help!"
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"I said little help. Throw me the ball, Poindexter."
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"I'm sorry, Bart. I don't know the rules of your sport."
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"I didn't want to interfere with a ball in play."
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"Back to the forecastle of the Pequod."
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"-Hey, Martin. -I have nothing of value."
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"Help me get a passing grade."
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"You need someone's help, but I don't know why that someone should be me."
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"I can make it so the other kids don't laugh at you."
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"They laugh at me? I'd always considered myself rather popular."
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"You're not. Watch."
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"My speed with numbers, my years as a hall monitor..."
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"...my prize-winning dioramas, they mean nothing to them?"
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"-Very well, you've made your point. -Then it's a deal?"
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"Yes."
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"-Let's have a look at your study area. -Study area?"
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"Your sanctuary from the frenzy of modern life."
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"No, this won't do at all."
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"We have to clean up this room. And we'll need a fern."
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"No room is complete without plant life."
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"No. Geeks sit in the front. From now on, you sit in the back row."
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"That goes for school and church too."
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"-Why? -So no one can see what you're doing."
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"I understand."
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"Mischief varies inversely with proximity to the authority figure."
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"Yeah, but don't say it like that."
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