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Clips from Friends - The One with the Dozen Lasagnas (S01E01)

"Yep. You could plunk me down in the middle of any woman's uterus..."
Friends
"What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas?"
Friends
"How come you don't live with Mommy?"
Friends
"[SPEAKING IN ITALIAN]"
Friends
"Honey, you can say it. It's Poconos. Poconos."
Friends
"It's just a weekend. Big deal."
Friends
"What am I supposed to do, huh? Call lmmigration?"
Friends
"...forever."
Friends
"[KNOCKING ON DOOR]"
Friends
"Of course it's your friend Tanya."
Friends
"Oh. Ha, ha. Uh, well, is it what we thought it would be?"
Friends
"Never mind. I don't wanna know."
Friends
"Do you think we're ready for something like that?"
Friends
"Your 4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30."
Friends
"Okay. Thanks."
Friends
"Okay, I don't know what you just said, so let's just start."
Friends
"Whoa."
Friends
"GROUP: Hey, Phoebe. Hey, Pheebs."
Friends
"Hey, can we get some cappuccino over here?"
Friends
"Hey, Chandler. That table place closes at 7. Come on."
Friends
"Phoebe. What is it?"
Friends
"Oh, Boy Scouts could've camped under there."
Friends
"- Oh. - The actress."
Friends
"- What are you gonna you do? - You have to tell her."
Friends
"Fine."
Friends
"Okay. Thanks, Pheebs."
Friends
"- Which proves that I never lie. - I guess you don't."
Friends
"I think it's the most beautiful table I've ever seen."
Friends
"Should I not have told you?"
Friends
"I think she took it pretty well."
Friends
"She's got to know that you're everything he's not."
Friends
"[PAOLO SPEAKING IN ITALIAN]"
Friends
"Now there's just a lot of gesturing and arm-waving."
Friends
"Oh, okay, bye-bye."
Friends
"Oh. I've been better."
Friends
"[RACHEL SIGHS]"
Friends
"No, no."
Friends
"And I'm sure your little boy's not gonna grow up to be one."
Friends
"[IN UNISON] We already knew that."
Friends
"- One more game? - Oh, yeah."
Friends
"[ROSS SINGS THEME SONG FROM THE ODD COUPLE]"
Friends
"[CHANDLER JOINS IN]"
Friends
"[MONICA & PHOEBE JOIN IN]"
Friends
"[SINGING THEME FROM I DREAM OF JEANNIE]"
Friends
"No, no, we're done. We're done, man."
Friends
"Aunt Silv, stop yelling."
Friends
"All I'm saying is, if you had told me vegetarian lasagna..."
Friends
"...I would've made vegetarian lasagna."
Friends
"Well, the meat's only every third layer."
Friends
"Maybe you could scrape."
Friends
"Ross, did you really read all these baby books?"
Friends
"...no compass..."
Friends
"...and I could find my way out like that."
Friends
"Ooh, this is cool."
Friends
"It says in some parts of the world people actually eat the placenta."
Friends
"And we're done with the yogurt."
Friends
"Sorry."
Friends
"Aunt Silv, I did this as a favor. I am not a caterer."
Friends
"Nice talk, Aunt Silv."
Friends
"You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?"
Friends
"Hey, Ross, listen."
Friends
"Do you know that right now your baby is only this big?"
Friends
"- This is your baby. - Heh."
Friends
"[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Hi, Daddy."
Friends
"Hello."
Friends
"How come Mommy lives with that other lady?"
Friends
"What's a lesbian?"
Friends
"It's like "poke a nose.""
Friends
"Ah."
Friends
"Poke a nose."
Friends
"[IN UNISON] Blah, blah, blah."
Friends
"- So did I hear "Poconos"? - Yes."
Friends
"My sister's giving us her place for the weekend."
Friends
"Woo-hoo. First weekend away together."
Friends
"- Yeah, it's a big step. RACHEL: I know."
Friends
"Wasn't this supposed to be just a fling, huh?"
Friends
"Shouldn't it be..."
Friends
"...flung by now?"
Friends
"I mean, we are way past the "fling" thing."
Friends
"I'm feeling things I've only read about..."
Friends
"...in Danielle Steel books, you know?"
Friends
"I mean, when I'm with him, I'm just totally, totally..."
Friends
"Nauseous. I'm physically nauseous."
Friends
"I could call lmmigration."
Friends
"I love babies with their little baby shoes..."
Friends
"...and their little baby toes and their little hands..."
Friends
"Okay, you're gonna have to stop that..."
Friends
"[CLEARS THROAT]"
Friends
"Need a new table."
Friends
"You think?"
Friends
"CAROL: Hey, hey, hey. Come on in. - Hey. Hello."
Friends
"I brought the books..."
Friends
"...and Monica sends her love along with this lasagna."
Friends
"Oh, great."
Friends
"Is it vegetarian? Because Susan doesn't eat meat."
Friends
"I'm pretty sure that it is. Yeah."
Friends
"So I got the results of the amnio today."
Friends
"Oh, tell me. Is everything?"
Friends
"Totally and completely healthy."
Friends
"Ah."
Friends
"Hey. When did you and Susan meet Huey Lewis?"
Friends
"Uh, that's our friend Tanya."
Friends
"Don't you wanna know about the sex?"
Friends
"The sex?"
Friends
"Yeah, I'm having enough trouble with the image of you and Susan together."
Friends
"But when you throw in Tanya..."
Friends
"[GROANS]"
Friends
"The sex of the baby, Ross."
Friends
"Oh. You know the sex of the baby?"
Friends
"- Uh-huh. - Oh, oh, oh!"
Friends
"- Do you want to know? - No, no, no."
Friends
"No, I don't want to know. Absolutely not."
Friends
"No, I think you shouldn't know until you look down there..."
Friends
"...and see, "Oh, there it is.""
Friends
"Or isn't."
Friends
"- Oh. Hello, Ross. - Susan."
Friends
"So?"
Friends
"So did you hear?"
Friends
"Yes, we did. Everything's A-okay."
Friends
"Oh, that's so cool."
Friends
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