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Clips from The Simpsons - Opposites A-Frack (S26E26)

"whether to sell their mineral rights to Mr. Burns."
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"Oh, Maxine, no one insults me in a sound bite the way you do."
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"Oh, Monty, you're such a sexy little Nosferatu."
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"Same time tomorrow night?"
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"Better bring two tanks."
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"Hmm?"
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"And so,"
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"we see a clear correlation"
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"between industrial hydro compounds"
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"and water table contamination"
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"well outside the..."
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"margin of error."
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"Mr. Simpson, rebuttal?"
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"Everyone who signs over their mineral rights"
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"to Mr. Burns gets $5,000."
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"I think my arguments were more cogent-- Bo-hyvik."
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"Cogent-- Bo-hyvik!"
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"Everyone in the neighborhood sold us their gas rights!"
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"I have embarked on a "beneficial friendship""
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"with a woman with whom I have nothing in common."
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"Her opinions are abhorrent to me, but the passion."
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"Oh, baby."
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"How long can I sustain this high-wire act"
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"of loathing and lust?"
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"but I ain't no Lenny, neither."
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"no matter how much you try to keep things casual,"
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"someone always gets hurt."
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"Hmm. Well, then I must harden my heart against such an outcome."
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"I appreciate the counsel, Simpson."
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"Now, please trap-door yourself out."
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"Glad I could be of help!"
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"Do you have the signed gas leases?"
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"Hold on."
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"Ah. One of these deeds is missing a signature."
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"was never signed by... Marge Simpson."
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"Marge, why didn't you sign?"
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"I'm sorry, but the law states"
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"that unless every single resident sells their rights,"
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"Oh!"
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"to pay for my other calf implant."
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"Yuck."
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"Marge Simpson, I'm as mad at you"
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"as you usually are at me!"
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"Hmm!"
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"All you lost was money,"
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"but what you get is... me."
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"All I lost was money?"
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"Let me make one thing perfectly clear."
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"Our dalliance meant nothing to me!"
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"You were but a sprig of parsley garnishing my beefsteak."
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"Now I cast you aside for the busboys to gnaw upon."
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"I played this just perfectly."
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"Oh, yeah, great. Great, Marge, great work."
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"Thanks to you, Springfield will never be a natural gas boomtown,"
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"and like all boomtowns, it would have lasted forever."
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"I finally got a job I was good at,"
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"and now I have to give it up!"
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"So, you've come begging not to be fired?"
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"It was all my wife's fault!"
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"Sometimes I think she and I have nothing in common!"
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"Marge likes sushi."
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"I like gum that squirts in your mouth."
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"She's into romantic comedies."
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"I like movies where there's only"
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"one day a year when murder is legal."
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"Yup, Marge and I see the world in totally different ways."
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"Hmm. Different, exactly."
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"That's why I had to give my woman the old heave-ho."
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"So, you don't miss that politics lady at all?"
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"Killdozers."
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"We're tearing down this place and putting up"
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"a recycling center,"
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"slash condor sanctuary."
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"Hmm. A project this bloated and ill thought out"
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"could only be the work of an angry liberal."
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"Maxine!"
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"My ex is using the thing I hate most against me--"
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"big government."
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"Stop this ribbon cutting!"
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"This is private property!"
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"What's the matter, Mr. Burns?"
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"You're just doing this to get back at me for dumping you!"
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"It's a National Public Radio broadcast center now."
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"Who are you?"
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"I'm Robert Siegel, and this is All Things Considered."
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"There's work to be done!"
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"Or Gravy Thursday."
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"Is one of the side effects of fracking earthquakes?"
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"Yes!"
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"You're destroying this neighborhood."
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"I don't know what I ever saw in you, you planet-ruining monster!"
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"Likewise, you planet-saving succubus!"
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"You've just been brainwashed by liberal TV shows"
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"but it can save this country!"
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"Our... water... was..."
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"Wait. I finally get what you're saying."
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"Fracking is great, but the only place"
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"it should ever happen is in other people's towns!"
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"You always do the right thing... sort of."
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"What is he doing?"
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"He told me himself they had nothing in common."
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"I was a fool to break up with you, Maxine."
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"I'm sorry I turned your home into a liberal paradise."
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"You think we could make us work?"
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"I don't know. We're pretty different."
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"But we've got passion, and as long as we've got that,"
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"our lives will never get boring."
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"My sister's dog had puppies."
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"I don't know."
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"What color drawer pulls did you want?"
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"There's a sale on lawn furniture at the Lawns Plus."
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"Why are all cars black or gray now?"
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"I'm thinking about wearing a watch again."
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"♪ The Simpsons 26x05 ♪ Opposites A-Frack Original Air Date on November 2, 2014"
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"but the cleaners still haven't gotten all the black mold"
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"Here."
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"They wouldn't even let us see the Mona Lisa."
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"You can't invite a couple of Riddlers"
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"Nature is God's ashtray."
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"Electric cigarettes."
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