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Clips from South Park - Death (S01E01)

"Now blow out the candles, Grandpa."
South Park
"- Make a wish, Grandpa. - I wish I were dead."
South Park
"- A certain student's mother called. - I wonder who that could have been?"
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"Kenny, why are you late to class?"
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"Throughout history, there have always been very bad shows."
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"...goes around and murders people that ask him to."
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"What if he really wants to die, and he's just asking for help?"
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"I was not aware of this horrible show until recently."
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"...unless they pissed me off. - Is that a fact?"
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"Yea, believe in me and ye shall find peace. First caller?"
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"- My son... - Yes?"
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"Your mom's a bitch, but we shouldn't suffer."
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"Bitch. Your mom is a bitch."
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"Okay, Grandpa, just get out of the way."
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"- Those beans might make me fart. - Well, don't fart on me."
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"You jerk! You were trying to kill Grandpa."
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"Four boys from South Park, Colorado..."
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"These boys' minds have been tainted by the garbage on television..."
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"Oh, God. Oh, God."
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"- Mary, you making gravy in there? - I just had a brown baby boy."
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"Hey, you will not get away with this!"
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"Carol, where are the porta potties?"
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"- You got the cow all tied up? - All done."
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"Toon Central is now under incredible pressure..."
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"What is it? Did you break something?"
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"Keep it under 70. Take care of Grandpa."
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"Parents get offended because they rely on TV as a babysitter and educator."
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"Quick, jump through the window!"
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"...are still killing themselves in front of the Toon Central building."
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"We interrupt this program to bring you loud static."
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"- Grandpa? - That's right, Billy."
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"- Here they are. - We did it, son."
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"- Is this Jesus? - Yes. You need to turn your TV down."
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"We're not watching Terrance and Phillip, I swear."
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"I'm doing something important for your well-being."
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"- You were behind all the shenanigans. - You're the stupid ho who started it."
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"Kids won't even kill their grandparents."
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"That show's for babies. It's so stupid."
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"You just came from the bathroom."
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"You're so obsessed with ending your life, you're not thinking about his."
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"Just kill him. Maybe he'll give you money."
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"I was wrong to put you in that position."
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"- Hello there. - Hey, Chef."
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"Death"
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"I can't take it. This music is terrible."
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"Don't worry, dude, we can watch it at my house."
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"Come on, let's go! What the...?"
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"My name's not Billy, Grandpa. Why do you look all haggard?"
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"Natural causes, Billy, natural causes."
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"We were watching Terrance and Phillip and..."
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"- Wait to die of natural causes. - But I've been waiting for 25 years!"
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"Hey, Stan, now what are we gonna do for entertainment?"
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"- What are they doing? - I don't know."
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"- I'm not going to kill you, Grandpa. - Ingrate!"
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"What's the idea of having your mom call all our moms?"
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"That show is bad, Mr. Garrison. That's right, Mr. Hat."
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"There's more to life than two men farting."
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"...if they ask you to, like assisted suicide. Is that okay?"
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"- How did you know that? - Because I'm the son of God, brainiac."
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"You should be enlightening your mind with more intelligent entertainment."
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"- Dude, Snacky Cakes? - What do I do?"
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"We will march to the network and protest until our demands are met."
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"He farted right on his head."
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"Okay, all you have to do is sit there."
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"You are not to watch that show anymore."
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"Cut the damn rope, already!"
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"And now back to Jesus and Pals."
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"The die-hard South Park parents..."
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"- Wait, wait. - Ladies and gentlemen..."
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"- We could start breathing gas fumes. - My uncle says smoking crack is cool."
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"...has worked."
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"Dude, he's gonna fart on his head again."
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"Why won't anybody talk about this?"
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"- I've got the green-apple splatters. - Green-apple splatters."
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"Billy, help me stick this fork in the outlet."
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"- I bet I know what's coming. - Billy, would you hold this for me."
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"If parents worried less about what their kids watch on TV..."
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"We will be taking Terrance and Phillip off the network..."
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"Billy..."
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"- Totally, dude. - Good point."
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