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Clips from The Simpsons - Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy (S05E05)

"Well, um-- [ Coughs ] without further ado..."
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""We love you, Matlock ""
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"[ Fans Screaming ]"
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"[ Choking ]"
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"For three weeks, all you been talkin' about was meeting Matlock."
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"I can feel death's clammy hand on my shoulder."
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"That way, I can see you enjoy it."
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"[ Grampa ] Anyway, about my washtub."
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"a ''walking bird. ''"
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"[ Cooing ]"
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"complete with Deathbringer missiles that really launch."
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"Hmm!"
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"- " One, two, three o'clock four o'clock rock " - "[ Piano ]"
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"" Five, six, seven o'clock Eight o'clock rock ""
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"- [ Girls Screaming ] - [ Gasping ]"
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"I'm warning you, Mom. I may get a little crazy."
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"Hey, horse face! Get your ugly pie-hooks off that Summer Fun Set!"
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"[ Dings ]"
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"- Thanks for buyin' us these toys, Grampa. - Bah!"
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"- Hello.! - [ Horn Beeping ]"
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"Yes, but there's more. Dad, I love you."
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"But what am I gonna do about it?"
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"- [ Gulping ] - [ Explosion ]"
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"Don't ask me. I'm just a girl! [ Giggles ]"
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"That they can never be anything more than vacuous ninnies..."
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"whose only goal is to look pretty, land a rich husband..."
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"talking about how damn terrific it is to look pretty and have a rich husband!"
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"- Let's buy makeup, so the boys will like us! - [ Chattering ]"
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"And we can't watch Fox, 'cause they own those chemical weapon plants in Syria."
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"- [ Groans ] - That's it! I'm callin' the company."
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"If you have a complaint about Malibu Stacy's appearance or odor, press one."
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"[ Grumbling ]"
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"The dream? To mass-market a fashion doll that was also edible."
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"Kids didn't much like the taste of dried onion meal, but they loved the doll."
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"Waylon Smithers of Springfield."
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"Hello, Malibu Stacy collectors. I'll see you..."
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"[ Announcer ] And what does Stacy think ofher 35 years of success..."
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"[ Announcer, Chuckling ] She sure is."
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"- If you have any questions, I'd be happy to answer-- - I have one."
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"- "[ Wolf Whistle ] - Hey,Jiggles! Grab a pad and back that gorgeous butt in here."
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"It's rotten bein' old. No one listens to ya!"
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"- and gripin', it's time for-- - action!"
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"- You're getting a job! - Yes! I'm going where the action is!"
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"Whew! [ Chuckles ] That would be quite a feat."
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"It contains her last known whereabouts."
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"- [ Tires Skidding ] - No, it couldn't be!"
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"- Am I the first? - Yes."
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"Thinking too much gives you wrinkles."
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"My name is Stacy. But you can call me-- " [ Wolf Whistle ]"
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"I was funneling profits to the Vietcong."
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"I may have had things in common with Stacy in the beginning..."
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"And to top it off, the down-to-earth good looks of Eleanor Roosevelt."
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"Joe, I told you. It's over."
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"I'll bomb your house into the ground, missy!"
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"Um, I think we'll use someone different for the hair."
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"All right, you poindexters. Let's get this right."
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"One: ''Hey, hey, kids, I'm Talkin' Krusty.''"
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"Two: ''Hey, hey! Here comes Slide Show Mel.''"
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"Again. ''Here comes Sideshow Mel. Sideshow Mel.''"
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"Bada-bing, bada-boom. I'm done. Learn from a professional, kid."
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"[ Car Door Closing, Tires Screeching ]"
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"Okay, Krusty. We are ready to roll any-- What the--"
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"All right! Now all we need is a name."
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"How 'bout ''Blabbermouth, theJerky Doll forJerks''?"
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"How 'bout Minerva, after the Roman goddess of wisdom?"
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"- ''Hortense, the Mule-Faced Doll''? - I think we should name her after Lisa."
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"- They couldn't resist. - Really?"
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"[ Chuckling ]"
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"- Dad? - Mm-hmm?"
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"I'm very busy preparing a report about the 40th anniversary of Beetle Bailey."
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"Oh, Daddy, that is boring."
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"- Good night. - "[ News Theme ]"
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"- [ Chattering ] - You know a good place?"
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"I cut my tongue on these pancakes."
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"That's your policy, not mine."
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"- [ Angry Chattering ] - You whippersnapper!"
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"- [ Cheering ] - [ Laughing ]"
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"[ Sighs ] Well, I guess you can't beat big business."
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"- What? - Oh, nothing. Kudos to you, Lisa."
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"D'oh! [ Screams ]"
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"You know, health care for the aging is an important priority--"
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"[ Chuckles ] I give you the man who puts young people behind bars..."
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"- [ Applauding ] - [ Grunting ]"
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"" Oh yes, we do ""
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"What's eatin' you, Abe?"
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"Now you met him, swiped his pills--"
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"- ''Take one every hour to prevent spastic heart convulsions.'' - [ Siren Wailing ]"
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"I'm no spring chicken myself."
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"Wait, that's my hand."
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"So, I've decided to give you your inheritance before I die."
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"Lisa, I know you like reading, and... so forth."
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"To you, I give you my lifetime of personal correspondence."
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"Thanks. ''Mr. Simpson. Stop. Your constant letters are becoming a nuisance. Stop."
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"Stop. Signed, Boris Karloff. Hollywood, California.''"
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"- And to my son, Homer-- - Whoo-hoo!"
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"I leave these-- a box of mint condition..."
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"1 91 8 Liberty Head silver dollars."
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"You see, back in those days, rich men would ride around..."
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"in zeppelins, dropping coins on people."
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"And one day, I seen J.D. Rockefeller flyin' by--"
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"so I run out of the house with a big washtub, and--"
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"and listen to your amusing ''antidotes,''"
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"but we have to take these coins to the mall and spend 'em!"
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"I just used it that morning to wash my turkey..."
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"which in those days was known as..."
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"We'd always have walking bird on Thanksgiving, with all the trimmings."
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"Cranberries, ''injun eyes,'' and yams stuffed with gunpowder."
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"Then we'd all watch football, which in those days was called ''baseball.''"
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"Mm. That toy isn't safe for a baby like Maggie."
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"Aw, come on, Marge. You're way too--"
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"When I was young, toys were built to last."
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"Look at this junk! It breaks the first time you take it out of the box."
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"All right. Come on, pops."
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"- Soldiers won't bother you anymore. - Oh!"
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"" Rock, rock, rock, rock, rock Rock, rock, rock ""
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"" Rock, rock, rock We're gonna rock, gonna rock ""
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"- [ Howling, Barking ] - "Around this clock tonight ""
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"- [ Booing,Jeering ] - Thank you. Thank you very much."
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"I understand, honey. When I was your age, there was a--"
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"Look! Achy Breaky Stacy for $1 .99!"
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