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Clips from The Simpsons - Bart Gets an Elephant (S05E05)

"- [ Heavy Panting ] - Hey, what's with them?"
The Simpsons
"I think they're trying to get some attention."
The Simpsons
"Oh. Good luck!"
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"Look at these bills. ''Chain for elephant.''"
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"''Shots for elephant.'' ''Oversized decorative poncho''!"
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"You'll have to raise my allowance to about $1 ,000 a week."
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"- Then that's what I'll do, smart guy. - [ Doorbell Rings ]"
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"- Can we see the elephant? - We'll pay you money."
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"For the ninth time, no!"
The Simpsons
"[ Playful Chattering ]"
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"- That counts as a ride. Two bucks. - That was never five feet."
The Simpsons
"That animal of yours is certainly bad-tempered."
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"and gawked at by a bunch of slack-jawed yokels."
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"You guys don't understand Stampy. He's just like me."
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"We're a pair of jokers, and both of us are wild."
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"We don't take nothing from nobody. [ Sighs ]"
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"[ Laughs ] Smithers.!"
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"This reminds me of that fat man I used to ride to work."
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"- [ Groaning ] - [ Door Closes ]"
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"I'm the smartest businessman in the world."
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"Stampy's food bill today was $300."
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"Marge, please, don't humiliate me in front of the money."
The Simpsons
"[ Customers Reacting Negatively ]"
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"[ Car Doors Slamming, Tires Screeching ]"
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"Well, that was under our old price structure."
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"so that's just $696 more that you owe me."
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"Get off our property."
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"No, Dad, he's my friend."
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"Sorry, Bart. I'm gonna have to sell him."
The Simpsons
"- [ Roars ] - Well, sir, I'll be honest with ya."
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"What do you mean? It's an elephant, isn't it?"
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"It's perfect, Dad."
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"I only have two questions: How much? And give it to me."
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"Well, we really can't offer you any money."
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"- We're a nonprofit organization. - So, your bid is zero?"
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"- Well, we'd like to think of it as-- - Thank you."
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"- You know, I really think-- - Thank you."
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"Mr. Simpson, I think you'll find this amount more than fair."
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"Lisa, a guy who has lots of ivory is less likely to hurt Stampy..."
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"- [ Growling ] We love... you. - [ Meows ]"
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"- Are you an ivory dealer? - [ Laughs ]"
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"Little girl, I've had lots of jobs in my day--"
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"whale hunter, seal clubber, president of the Fox network--"
The Simpsons
"And, like most people, yeah, I've dealt a little ivory."
The Simpsons
"- I'll be back in the morning to pick up Stampy. - Here's the keys."
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"Don't worry, Stampy."
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"I won't let Homer sell you to that ivory dealer."
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"We'll keep to the back roads and make our way south."
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"Okay, bud, very quietly, let's just sneak through--"
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"- That's horsemen, Ned. - Well, getting closer."
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"He took Bart too? That wasn't part of our deal, Blackheart!"
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"That wasn't part!"
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"[ Laughs ] Look."
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"- [ Groans ] I feel it all the way up my skirt. - Ditto."
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"[ Men ] Whoa!"
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"[ Chuckles ] Yeah, right, lady."
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"An elephant ran through your front yard. Okay."
The Simpsons
"Wiggum. Yeah, right, mister. Mm-hmm."
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"And I'm Edward G. Robinson. Waah!"
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"- "[ Celebratory ] - [ Cheering ]"
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"This is the moment we've feared, people."
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"You all thought I was mad."
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"Many of you requested to be transferred to another peanut factory."
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"- [ Trumpeting ] - Huh?"
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"Oh. He's gone forever."
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"Oh, you're lonely for other elephants, aren't you?"
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"- D'oh! - A deer! - A female deer."
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"And, of course, your lovable pet, who it's connected to."
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"Dad, I can't let you sell him. Stampy and I are friends. Ow!"
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"Anyway, I want him to go to that animal refuge."
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"Forget it! That elephant cost me thousands of dollars."
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"Dad, how would you like to be sold to an ivory dealer?"
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"- I'd like it fine. - Even if he killed you..."
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"Yes, of course I would. Who wouldn't like that, to be part of the music scene?"
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"- Get a rope, Bart. - No, that's okay."
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"First, I'll just reach in and pull my legs out."
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"Now I'll pull my arms out with my face."
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"Stampy, quick! Pull him out!"
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"Thanks, Stampy."
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"Ow!"
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"Ah, I'm alive! I'm alive!"
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"Dad, feline means cat."
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"And I'm sure he'll make a grand piano."
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"- [ Both ] Dad! - Oh."
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"after he saved my life."
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"And the boy seems to have some sort of relationship with him."
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"who's to say what's right these days..."
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"what with all our modern ideas... and products?"
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"Uh, Mom, we're stuck to Dad."
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"- Ow! - Ow, my hair!"
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"[ Trumpets ]"
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"[ Trumpets ]"
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"[ Laughs ] Attaboy, Stampy. Butt him once for me."
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"Then why is he attacking all those other elephants?"
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"Well, animals are a lot like people, Mrs. Simpson."
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"- Some of them act badly because they've had a hard life-- - Stampy!"
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"or have been mistreated."
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"But, like people, some of them are just jerks."
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"[ Splat ]"
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"Sandwich. [ Groans ]"
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"[ Groans ]"
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"I must destroy you!"
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"[ Screaming ]"
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"Can't tie up the line, Grampa."
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"- [ Electrical Charge ] - Ahh, that's the stuff."
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"- Nobody takes the gag prize. You want the cash. - I want the elephant."
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"[ Laughs ] Stick it to the man."
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"- " [ Static, Mellow Music ] - [ Bart ] Where's my elephant?"
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"This is the DJ-3000."
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"Whoa, that was the caller from hell."
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"If you don't get that kid an elephant by tomorrow, the DJ-3000 gets your job."
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"[ Grunts ] Cool!"
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"No, Dad, he's grooming him."
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"[ Straining ]"
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"[ Doorbell Rings ]"
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"I don't have time to read it. Just give me the gist of it, Son."
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"Hey, Ma, look at that pointy-hairded little girl. [ Guffaws ]"
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"Um, Milhouse saw the elephant twice and rode him once, right?"
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"your bill comes to a total of $7 00."
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"You and I are gonna run away together."
The Simpsons
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