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Clips from How I Met Your Mother (2005) - Romance (S04E04)

"Okay, okay."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but I promise you, I will come back."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I haven't? Oh, well."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"He was always kind of around."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Have you met Ted?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"The first thing is that Doug had a bit of a violent streak."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"just putting the boots to him. Yeah, he's making that face, all shaking."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"The second thing is that he was weird about his hair."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(LAUGHS)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- It's cool, I'll take care of it. Okay? - Oh, boy, there he goes."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"MAN 1: It's not... MAN 2: Why are you yelling at us?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Okay, let's go. - Okay, okay."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Our assistance with what?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We're going to go out in the alley and fight those guys."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Those guys are being inconsiderate, okay?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So we're going to go outside and cave in their skulls, okay?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"It might not be pretty,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And scars, hello! If a guy's got a scar, he's got a Robin."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And if he's missing teeth, I'm missing my pants."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"There was that thing at camp."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"In college, I studied some kung fu."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"The thing with the goat wasn't for another few months."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Cocoa break."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- We? - Yeah, we."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Okay, are you ready? - To go back in?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(GRUNTS)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(ALL CHEERING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(ALL LAUGHING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"All right. Okay. I'll set them straight."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(CHEERING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Wow. So, you just beat those guys up?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Um..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yes, we are gonna beat those guys up. Ted, come on."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Are you Ted Mosby?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We'll let you leave with your asses unkicked."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"OLDER TED: Actually, he did know that the worst we were looking at"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"was a small civil settlement and probably no criminal charges."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"OLDER TED: Why do we fight?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What is that thing deep within each of us"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"that compels us to settle disagreements with our fists?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Whatever it is, it's there right from the beginning."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Okay, okay, okay. Stop fighting. - Why?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Because it's stupid and juvenile. - We're six. We are stupid and juvenile."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Now, as you know, I had recently been left at the altar."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And the worst thing about getting left at the altar,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I mean, aside from actually getting left at the altar, was what came next."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"A steady, unrelenting, unbearable stream of pity."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Cranberry gin and tonic."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Scotch and soda."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Thank you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Can I see a menu? - Ted, I'm going to go get you a menu,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Okay, we have to start going someplace else."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"At this bar, I'm always gonna be the guy who got left at the altar."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- That sucks! - (CHUCKLES) Good times."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Uh-oh. We lost Barney. - What do you mean?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"There's a girl over there in a tight red sweater."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So he's not listening to a word anyone's saying. Right, Barney?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Gimme a break!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"See, he figured out a while back he could fake an entire conversation"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"just by saying titles of black sitcoms from the '70s and '80s."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- What's happening? - Hey, Barney,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"want to go upstairs and do stuff to me that I won't even let Marshall do?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Huh. Different strokes."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What the hell is this?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Doug Martin was a bartender at MacLaren's."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No. No, no, no. We're not playing, "Have you met Ted?""
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Am I dead? Am I dead? - Hey."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Tonight, I pick up a lesbian."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Anyway, three things you need to know about Doug."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"...crumbled, so he's on the ground, right? And we're just kicking him,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So, anyway, what we did was, we left him there."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Top you up?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- What? - What?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Are you looking at my hair? - No, sir. I was not."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"It's a toupee."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Is that funny? You want to laugh it up? Is it funny, guy?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I tell you what, why don't you grab it?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Excuse me? - Yeah, go ahead, grab it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Grab it right off my head. Go ahead. You don't want to grab it? Come on."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Come on, go ahead and grab it. Want to grab it off my head?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Grab my toupee right off my head."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(ALL LAUGHING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I like you guys!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"But the third thing is that he was very loyal to his regulars."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Hey, hey! There they are! - Hey, man."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Hey, you guys want your booth?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- No. We're fine over here. - Yeah? Yeah? Yeah."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Maybe a little too loyal."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- No. No. - No, it's fine, it's fine."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Okay, you two lovebirds, let's take this somewhere else. Booth's reserved."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Let's go! Now! Come on!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Give me some hustle, Father! Up you get. Okay, guys, here we are."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So, that's Doug."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What the hell is this?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh. Some guys are sitting in our booth. But you know what? This is fine."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Gentlemen, I will require your assistance outside."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What's happening now?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm sorry, did you just say..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"This will be fun!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"He wants us to fight? Like, with our hands and stuff?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And feet, maybe? I don't know what the rules are."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Wow, a fight. Should we go out there? - Come on, Ted."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"There's only three things you'll ever see me fight. The stubborn clasp of a bra,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"sexual harassment charges, nine for nine,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and the urge to vomit when I see someone wearing brown shoes with a black suit."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Marshall? - Dude, fighting is for losers."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We're civilized guys. Civilized guys don't fight."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Unless it's with lightsabers. But that's like three to five years away, so..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Well, that's not true. - Robin, I'm on the forums every day."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Three to five Thanksgivings from now,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm gonna be carving the turkey with Old Green."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, I'm saying there are plenty of legitimate reasons to get in a fight."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but in certain situations, you gotta do what you gotta do."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh. Right, I forgot. She thinks fighting's sexy."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, I do not, a lot."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Look, I come from a culture of hockey players."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"If a guy can throw down, it's somewhat way hot."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm missing my wisdom teeth."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Outpatient procedure. Local anesthesia. Whatever. It ain't a thing."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Look, maybe we should go out there."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
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