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Clips from Chappelle's Show - Episode #1.11 (S01E01)

"to pop wheelies on my bicycle, watch her eyes twinkle."
Chappelle's Show
"My base of fans is made up of many."
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"And my straightened-out types who be waitin' to hear"
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"While some others play God,"
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"they just goddamn fools with it."
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"Rough and rugged yet the girls still love it."
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"tellin' me I left lacerations around my mic's neck."
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"Folks, I'd like to thank my guest, De La Soul."
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"It's Fisticuffs."
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"Turn your motherfuckin' stereo up, what?"
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"It's hot!"
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"That's ridiculous."
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"This one, nigger, this is my left, turn it up!"
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"one night in the ghetto,"
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"There's a lot of heat right here."
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"You heard, what?"
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"You heard?!"
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"(cheers & applause)"
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"What?!"
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"is give back."
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"Oh, ah, oh!"
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"Actually, I'm answering your ad in the paper."
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"Well, your ad says $300."
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"All right? Yeah."
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"Man, I look like that 7-Up guy."
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"is still tryin' to get himself together from it."
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"them drums say the revolution is near."
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"We got by the MCS with these tools."
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"if the volume's so low, turn it up!"
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"Watch out for your mind, all this is hot."
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"I'm serious, nigger, I can't hear outta this ear,"
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"Oh... well, is the beat gonna stop?"
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"His lyrics are so tight, they don't even have to rhyme."
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"that I had an opportunity to do this show."
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"I'll leave you two alone."
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"Half Baked sucked, anyway."
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"I got verb skills, babies, and bills."
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"This is Fisticuffs, 2003, bitch!"
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"From the... what happened?"
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"and keep the island close to me"
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"Not for real, nigger, I'm sayin' on the paper,"
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"You ain't scorin' no more, though."
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"No, no, fuck it, I'ma go through with this."
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"Are your eardrums open for Christening?"
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"And if you haven't heard that joint, "Turn My Headphones Up","
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"and you can see the last person they had sex with."
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"Turn 'em up!"
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"I stabbed a brother in the neck"
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"A'ight, here I go."
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"holla at ya boy!"
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"Where's my snares?"
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"I'ma drop it like this,"
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"That's right, here I come."
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"Uranium, ya heard?"
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"Hey."
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"Welcome back."
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"What is this, jail, motherfucker?"
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"Damn!"
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"Man, y'all,"
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"I just got that 50 Cent."
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"Gonna steal it, comin' down."
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"And I've had an opportunity to meet"
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"I'm rich, bitch."
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"Pump up that bass, pump up that bass!"
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"Nurse, could you come in here, please, quickly?"
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"(laughter)"
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"We'll be right back with more Chappelle's Show."
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"No, you know when we thought of that sketch,"
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"I can't come back in?"
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"How excited can you really be"
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"Unh, here it come, wait... oh!"
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"God, get surgery, bitch, you're so ugly."
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"I have an agenda and it goes like this... oh!"
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"Let's go, I'm whuppin' that ass now, almost done."
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"and that shit get so emotional,"
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"Oh, oh..."
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"Hey."
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"House rules so house take the bank, watch Dave bank."
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"than they could ever see."
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"from my man, Justin Timberlake."
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"But don't go nowhere,"
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"Be right back."
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"(cheers & applause)"
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"Yo, you a funny dude, man, you funny."
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"All right, we're gonna take a quick commercial break."
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"the undisputed, underdog serving y'all threat."
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"H-h-here we go again, go again, go again..."
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"that's how he came up, with them mix tapes."
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"Now that he came out with them mix tapes"
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"I got one DVD in the mail from a..."
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"(announcer) Dave Chappelle...!"
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"We poppin' bottles, stabbin' people, killin' people."
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"All right, make that beat drop."
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"You ready to rock it?"
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"my man got shot in his ear like, eight times."
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"And, uh, well, here's one of their stories."
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"More applesauce?"
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"Come on in, Dave."
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"So what you got here, some Playstation?"
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"Come on, Billy."
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"What'd I say, you weren't gonna score no more."
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"Feel better."
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"No!"
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"Kick my ass, huh?"
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"Oh, I knew I should have brought a prettier friend."
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"(Mike) Don't you want me, son?"
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"and make my face look na-tur-al."
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"for a video you've seen 58 times in a row?"
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"I just want to make a total request live"
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"fucking with dice."
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"God bless y'all, I'm out."
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"Turn it up, I'm serious!"
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"(cheers & applause)"
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"I'm serious, nigger, turn them shits up!"
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"in the shit and think they nice headphones!"
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"Turn them shits up."
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"We're gonna take a quick commercial break, y'all."
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"We'll be right back with more Chappelle's Show."
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"Are you listening?"
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"(cheers & applause)"
Chappelle's Show
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