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Clips from King of the Hill - Now Who's the Dummy? (S05E05)

"TV ANNOUNCER: [Vow Vi/ay Singh with a testy 12-foot putt."
King of the Hill
"Man..."
King of the Hill
"That's a golf tournament."
King of the Hill
"I know. The one with the fabulous green jackets."
King of the Hill
"[Crowd cheering on TV]"
King of the Hill
"JERRY: Wonderful."
King of the Hill
"for a moment it made me forget the nurse stole my watch."
King of the Hill
"You're selling yourself short."
King of the Hill
"Portuguese cork. That's funny."
King of the Hill
"It takes great acting, Bobby. Oscar-caliber."
King of the Hill
"Nobody could do it today. Except maybe Meryl Streep."
King of the Hill
"I want you to have him."
King of the Hill
"He's the best athlete ever to attend All-America High."
King of the Hill
"I may look big, but very little of it is muscle."
King of the Hill
""The fluttering butterflies gracefully filled the skies in Pacific Grove.""
King of the Hill
"Dad, this is Chip Block."
King of the Hill
"We're practicing our labials."
King of the Hill
"- Another. - Don't you think you've had enough?"
King of the Hill
"I thought you were playing with a Barbie doll."
King of the Hill
"I'll never forget this. In this game, I had a no-hitter."
King of the Hill
"Who was the last pitcher to win 30 games?"
King of the Hill
"That's day-one stuff, Chip. Give me a hard one."
King of the Hill
"You got me. Unless it was eight."
King of the Hill
"Bobby, maybe you and your action figure..."
King of the Hill
"[Dale screams]"
King of the Hill
"Yeah. People criticize him for playing little ball."
King of the Hill
"But I say a "W" is a "W" any way you get it."
King of the Hill
"I couldn't handle the pressure, anyway."
King of the Hill
"I love this guy."
King of the Hill
"Enjoy your last few breaths, dummy."
King of the Hill
"I'll have cinnamon rolls, pancakes, 7-Up, bacon."
King of the Hill
"Bobby, if you're gonna bulk up, do it right."
King of the Hill
"You want five raw eggs in a glass."
King of the Hill
"Raw eggs? Haven't you heard of salmonella?"
King of the Hill
"I think tennis does a pretty good job of making fun of itself."
King of the Hill
"KIDS: [Singing] Someaneis gota birthday"
King of the Hill
"[Gear whirring]"
King of the Hill
"Except do it right here."
King of the Hill
"Tee time is in two hours and eight minutes."
King of the Hill
"Hello, Mr. Gribble. Nice to see you."
King of the Hill
"[Dale screams]"
King of the Hill
"No, thanks, Mr. Hill."
King of the Hill
"I'm gonna hang out here today."
King of the Hill
"Come on, Chip."
King of the Hill
"[Hank laughs]"
King of the Hill
"11:16. Octavio speaks into tape recorder..."
King of the Hill
""Dear Octavio..."
King of the Hill
""this is the hardest letter..."
King of the Hill
""I've ever had to write.""
King of the Hill
"Silence on the tee."
King of the Hill
"What will you have, Chip? A can of Thompson's Water Seal?"
King of the Hill
"DALE: Hello."
King of the Hill
"Help!"
King of the Hill
"Can I help you?"
King of the Hill
"Yes. I would like to purchase some chloroform..."
King of the Hill
"a roll of duct tape, and this gagging bandana."
King of the Hill
"You don't have to work blue to be funny."
King of the Hill
"No one likes a whiner, Bobby. Right, Chip?"
King of the Hill
"Caught you in the act."
King of the Hill
"I thought it was that thieving nurse coming back for the other cufflink."
King of the Hill
"Sorry. Old habits."
King of the Hill
"Well, when you and Chip were partners..."
King of the Hill
"That's a joke from my act."
King of the Hill
"- That didn't make you crazy? - Of course it did."
King of the Hill
"And I bet the guys there would get a kick out of Chip's..."
King of the Hill
"Is this part of your new act?"
King of the Hill
"I don't know where he is, but there were signs of a struggle."
King of the Hill
"[Dale laughs Victoriously]"
King of the Hill
"I mixed him in with two chairs and a toboggan."
King of the Hill
"Yep. Think about it."
King of the Hill
"But his neck wasn't really thick enough to play football, at least not competitively."
King of the Hill
"something I can be proud of."
King of the Hill
"but the new Chip will finally be able to throw a football."
King of the Hill
"It's kind of like I'm building you a big brother."
King of the Hill
"Okay, let's see here."
King of the Hill
"[Hammering]"
King of the Hill
"Dad, this yahoo thinks the Rangers..."
King of the Hill
"philosophically kick the Yankees' butts."
King of the Hill
"I'll watch the game. Anybody else in?"
King of the Hill
"Not me. I've got to spiff up..."
King of the Hill
"my old Pop Warner jersey for Chip No. 2."
King of the Hill
"Peggy, you know that hair we always find in the drain?"
King of the Hill
"And, you know, if there's any lumber left over..."
King of the Hill
"He's in the pocket."
King of the Hill
"You know, for the act. Me and Chip 2."
King of the Hill
"I mean, Chip 2 and me."
King of the Hill
"Yeah. I've still got a few more holes to drill along the scalp."
King of the Hill
"You know, to even out the hairline."
King of the Hill
"Hey!"
King of the Hill
"These are my short pants from when I was three."
King of the Hill
"Yeah. I guess you're right."
King of the Hill
"[Singing] Froggy went a-courting and he did ride uh-huh"
King of the Hill
"Uh -h uh"
King of the Hill
"Look, Peggy-"
King of the Hill
"Look at me with my two sons."
King of the Hill
"Hey, Dad. Guess who's the star of the Nursing Home Follies?"
King of the Hill
"Quiet, Bobby. We're watching the Masters."
King of the Hill
"TV ANNOUNCER: Bay, Ken, you can cut the tension with a knife."
King of the Hill
"A froggy went a-courtin' and he did ride"
King of the Hill
"A froggy went a-courtin' and he did ride Uh-huh, uh-huh"
King of the Hill
"A froggy went a-courtin' and he did ride Sword and pistol by his side"
King of the Hill
"Thank you, Garrity and Sons Nursing Home."
King of the Hill
"I'm Jerry Popper. I was on The Tonight Show once."
King of the Hill
"- Can you spare a minute? - Can I?"
King of the Hill
"Kid, I'll get right to the point. I hate living here."
King of the Hill
"But watching you up on that stage, lighting the place up..."
King of the Hill
"You got something, kid."
King of the Hill
"Moxie, chutzpah, pizzazz?"
King of the Hill
"This is Chip Block, all-American, and the original."
King of the Hill
"Not one of those plastic Woolworth's copies..."
King of the Hill
"that allowed me to retire in such comfort."
King of the Hill
"Right, Chip?"
King of the Hill
"Hey, Slugger. That was my brother's name."
King of the Hill
"They made him into a baseball bat. He was from Louisville."
King of the Hill
"- Who are you calling dummy, dummy? - Settle down, Chip."
King of the Hill
"Chip doesn't like to be called "dummy." He prefers the term "carved figure.""
King of the Hill
"Crafted by Mastermen's of Wisconsin. Portuguese cork."
King of the Hill
"Yep. But real ventriloquism is about more than telling jokes."
King of the Hill
"To play two roles at once."
King of the Hill
"Not that banjo-playing dork."
King of the Hill
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