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Clips from 30 Rock - Don Geiss, America and Hope (S04E04)

"And I'm ready to make."
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"Liz?"
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"I don't believe it!"
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"Hello, Wesley."
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"You can't fight the universe."
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"No, this isn't a coincidence."
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"Are you ready to settle and become Mrs. Snipes?"
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"And I'm never going to be Mrs. Snipes."
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"That is insane."
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"and you were asked who should be named Wesley Snipes,"
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"I give it two months before you give up and decide to settle!"
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"I'll see you in May!"
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"Well, hello."
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"'Cause I'll just listen patiently and say things like,"
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"You're a great woman."
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"It's the yellow button, sweetie."
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"I'd like to welcome everyone to this N.B.C."
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"particularly you gentlemen in the Tokyo office."
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"I know it's late there."
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"I don't know why you're wearing girls' pajamas,"
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"but I'm sure it's cultural."
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"This is an exciting time for N.B.C."
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"Not Seinfeld, Friends, E. R. exciting."
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"because KableTown is a great company."
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"Philadelphia."
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"How did you even get a snowball?"
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"Philly rules!"
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"Cheese steaks, Bobby Clarke, Will Smith!"
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"Your town sucks!"
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"You do not want this argument, Lemon."
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"Boston is the greatest city in the world."
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"Birthplace of Benjamin Franklin."
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"Yeah, then he looked around, realized it sucked,"
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"and moved to Philadelphia!"
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"Oh, did you just whip a battery at me?"
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"Hey, stop laughing."
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"Before I take your questions,"
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"I'd like to say a few words about Don Geiss."
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"there will be an Episcopal cryogenic freezing service"
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"open to all Six Sigma black belts and higher."
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"That's the craziest thing I've ever heard."
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"Now, the floor is open to questions."
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"with a song."
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"♪ Amazing... ♪"
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"Nope, I'm seeing him tonight."
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"You are? Why?"
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"Well, this morning I was buying an advance ticket"
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"Are we both seeing Hot Tub Time Machine tonight?"
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"Ugh."
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"It's like the universe keeps pushing us together."
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"We can't shake each other."
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"I had a thing where I kept running into Michael Douglas."
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"A moment?"
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"or did he swallow another firecracker?"
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"I wish."
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"Our old nanny wrote a tell-all book about me."
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"damage control on this."
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"And worst of all,"
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"she revealed the fact that I've never cheated on my wife."
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"Uh, actually, it is true."
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"Tracy, uh, shared that with me last year."
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"What?"
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"What about the strip clubs and the disgusting stories?"
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"Your Ben and Jerry's flavor is called "Adulteraisin"."
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"That's all for show."
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"Okay, and how is that a bad thing?"
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"is how I make my money, Liz Lemon."
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"I start losing my endorsements,"
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"Angie's going to be madder than a bat in a suitcase."
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"Yeah, not the time travel."
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"I should know, I've been in a hot tub two times."
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"Except for the snacks I got for us."
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"Well, what did you want? Popcorn?"
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"Yes!"
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"And by the way, your food obsession"
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"I want to smash your face."
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"I don't think we were meant to be together."
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"So why are you in my phone as "Future Husband"?"
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"And why am I in yours as "Future Wife"?"
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"I guess we'll never know."
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"Too bad we can't go back there."
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"I learned how to develop new products,"
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"and bad things to Chinese rivers."
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"G.E. is a great company."
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"Second only to the company of great friends."
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"I thought I would work at G.E. forever."
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"died with Don Geiss."
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"I have to accept that and move on"
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"A friend of mine has been worried"
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"they'll be bringing in new page rules,"
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"like age limits and age verification."
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"But later today, I'm meeting with an old colleague"
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"I'm going to pick his brain and learn how KableTown works"
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"the talent, and the looking-at-my watch skills"
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"Terrific, sir."
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"to put us under anesthesia again."
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"Wesley brought his video camera."
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"No."
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"And that way, afterwards,"
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"we can watch the tape and figure out what our connection was."
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"Would you ask a cardiologist to do something like this?"
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"Yeah, but a cardiologist is..."
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"I know what a cardiologist is."
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"So what if his wife is more attractive?"
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"But Dr. Kaplan, this is for love."
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"I'm British and charming,"
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"and she's got certain angles that work for her."
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"Let me show you what happens in there."
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"We are going to hang out so much after this."
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"I don't think there was any connection."
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"It was just the anesthesia."
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"Well, Liz, I wish you all the best."
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"But "Future Wife" deleted."
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"And if my heart surgeon brother is so great,"
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"But I've only killed one guy?"
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"Huh?"
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"What about the Seattle Seahawks cheerleader?"
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"That one kind-of-thick Rockette?"
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"Were those all lies too?"
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"I'm still terrible at my job."
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