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Clips from The Simpsons - My Mother the Carjacker (S15E15)

"You know, when I was on the run,"
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"I've got it all on this dictabelt."
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"Move in, boys!"
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"is a federal offense,"
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"which you've committed at every national park from Acadia to Zion."
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"You're going away for a long time, Mrs. Simpson."
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"Or should I call you "Anita Bonghitt"?"
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"No! I can't lose my mother again!"
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"Stop messing with him. The man lost his mother."
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"Just one more time."
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"Okay, it is pretty funny."
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"Mother, you had me"
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"Dad, I'm just as sad as you are."
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"What happened to Grandma is an outrage."
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"How do you figure? She was acquitted!"
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"Then they put her back in jail on a technicality!"
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"Well, they're transferring Grandma to a federal prison tomorrow."
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"I say we hit 'em where they live with a candlelight vigil."
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"Candlepin bowling? That's a great idea."
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"We'll play right after I break your grandmother out of prison."
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"(SINGING) I fought the law and the law won"
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"I fought the law and the law won"
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"(LAUGHING)"
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"Flip through those highway warnings"
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"Next."
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"Pass."
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"Boring."
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"Aw..."
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"(TIRES SCREECHING) (GUARDS COUGHING)"
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"Homer, what on earth are you doing?"
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"Who's the wheelman, granny?"
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"ALL: Aw..."
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"Oh, isn't he darling?"
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"He's a big one."
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"Oh, stop it."
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"make it back to the prison on your own."
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"We will."
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"Mom, I'm gonna hide you where there's no one around for miles."
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"Disney's California Adventure."
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"Homer, get out now and no one will ever know you're involved."
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"No! You're my mother, and I won't leave you!"
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"If you stay here, you'll be abandoning"
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"That did mess me up pretty bad. But I'm not gonna leave you!"
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"I see you've made your choice. I love you, Homer."
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"That's lucky."
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"Brambles! Briars! Nettles! Thorns!"
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"This is "the Man.""
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""and kept on truckin' to our pig pad.""
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"I don't know what you're saying. But I am not turning back."
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"What about a hot air balloon?"
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"Go, Mom! You can do it!"
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"(EXPLOSION)"
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"(RUMBLING)"
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"and we'll see you tomorrow at 10:00."
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"Grandma, you'll always be an inspiration to me."
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"You taught me a criminal can evade the law well into old age."
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"Thanks for the meatloaf recipe, I claim it as my own."
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"Mona, I'll always remember raspberry trolley cars."
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"Because my mind is shot."
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"Your last act as a mom was to make me a better dad."
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"But at least now, I'll never lose you again."
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"Homer, it's 2:00 in the morning."
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"Then what was in the coffin?"
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"Last week's garbage. I missed the pickup date."
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"But it doesn't matter, because my mom is alive! See?"
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"Get it? "L am okay.""
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"Okay, Homie."
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"If it makes you feel better, I think your mom's all right, too."
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"Hey, as long as we're thinking about her, Grandma's still alive."
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"Come on, big guy. This'll help you get to sleep."
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"MONA: Homer, your mother loves you."
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"I escaped from the bus the moment"
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"I then hitched a ride from a nice young couple."
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"We had lunch at a lovely diner."
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"They had clam chowder, Rhode Island-style."
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"(ELECTRICAL SOUNDS)"
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"Oh, relax. I'm sure it's just your brain going crazy."
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"Marge, I don't know what this is."
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"(UKULELE MUSIC PLAYING)"
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"Yes'm."
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"Sorry about all the cloak and dagger, Homer,"
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"(ALL GASP)"
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"But if you're wrong, you and Lou have to kiss each other."
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"Not for someone who tips 9%."
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"Fine!"
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"Yet local villain, Montgomery Burns, seen here terrorizing children"
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"I'll allow an lndian burn."
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"LISA: Ow!"
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"I'm sorry. My wife left me this morning."
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"(CRYING)"
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"That's enough."
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"when it was working. And $3 for a local call?"
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"They should be the ones on trial!"
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"Mother, she's right here."
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"(SCREAMING)"
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"Homer, this really isn't necessary."
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"were like "The Three Musketeers.""
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"Yeah. Poor Stevie. They never found his head."
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"like when I visited a state park."
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"Supplying false information on a national park register"
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"I wanted you"
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"But you didn't want me"
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"I hope this bus ride never ends,"
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"You're like the son I never killed."
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"your family the way I abandoned you."
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"Yeah."
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""I think it'd be a gas if you turned that magic bus around""
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"(EXCLAIMS IN FRUSTRATION)"
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"there might be a sign of my mom in one of these articles."
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"And the crackers kept on coming."
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"Win your own T-shirt!"
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"All right, I will."
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"(GAVEL SLAMMING)"
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"(TIRES SCREECHING) Look out!"
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"Oh, my God!"
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"(SINGING) The Simpsons"
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"(EXCLAIMING)"
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"Dad, the word's "desert." And those farmers are suffering."
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"No!"
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"Will you look at that?"
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