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Clips from Scrubs - My Faith in Humanity (S04E04)

"Classic Hooch. Even though I'm not gonna be paid,"
Scrubs
"I'll cover your shift so you can do Mr Schindler's endoscopy."
Scrubs
"All right!"
Scrubs
"Were you just Hooch?"
Scrubs
"- Hooch. - Hooch is crazy!"
Scrubs
"He and Carla started couples therapy, and I'm not sure he was enjoying it."
Scrubs
"but mostly because it was time. Finding an apartment has not been easy."
Scrubs
"I'm so sorry about your father."
Scrubs
"at 14 Maple Drive, apartment 4B."
Scrubs
"What are you doing in the on-call room?"
Scrubs
"- I gotta go. - OK."
Scrubs
"There's a weird new thing he does when he says goodbye."
Scrubs
"Peace, homey."
Scrubs
"The short, balding woman in the pharmacy."
Scrubs
"Are the guys here that bad?"
Scrubs
"- I'll call them back. - Your mom died."
Scrubs
"So, Betty, you're back with us."
Scrubs
"Well, I met her once."
Scrubs
"It was raining, and you were wearing a blue sweater."
Scrubs
"I'm going kayaking with friends in New Zealand."
Scrubs
"Jake. So you're probably rushing home to wipe the old person smell off?"
Scrubs
"I'm just kidding. I love old people."
Scrubs
"Well, I got a flight to catch."
Scrubs
"OK, then."
Scrubs
"The was one potent combination of verbal diarrhoea and stunned silence."
Scrubs
"You should have asked him out. Men love that."
Scrubs
"We don't love picnics, foreplay, candles,"
Scrubs
"If you want that guy to look your way,"
Scrubs
"listen to me carefully, ignore the living hell out of him."
Scrubs
"to sift through the wreckage that is the first year of your marriage?"
Scrubs
"Actually, I've noticed that."
Scrubs
"You pretend everything's OK, even though deep inside,"
Scrubs
"So come on, tell me what you're thinking right now."
Scrubs
"Even though I had created"
Scrubs
"but it's unlikely you'd ever come off of it."
Scrubs
"Look, is there anyone you'd like to talk this over with?"
Scrubs
"Yeah? About what?"
Scrubs
"and for some reason feels like she's connected with you."
Scrubs
"- Sorry. I wouldn't know what to say. - Open with a joke."
Scrubs
"You're close to revealing geography is your Achilles heel."
Scrubs
"You can dance your way there from Old Zealand."
Scrubs
"- I thought we were done with this. - Thought I'd give it a shot."
Scrubs
"Your husband's probably come to by now."
Scrubs
"Tell him he has a square head."
Scrubs
"That's not a compliment. What shape is a compliment?"
Scrubs
"Hey, Elliot."
Scrubs
"- She's a dude. - Yeah?"
Scrubs
"Gotta look at the Adam's apple, buddy."
Scrubs
"- Therapy is killing me. - I don't know how you do it."
Scrubs
"So check this out."
Scrubs
"Our therapist says I'm the type who pretends everything's OK,"
Scrubs
"intellectually you moved on, but emotionally you're still upset."
Scrubs
"- You see? - See what?"
Scrubs
"Let's try it again. I'll see you later, buddy. Bye."
Scrubs
"- Bye. - Always the same spot!"
Scrubs
"I've been hitting you?"
Scrubs
"- No way. - Yeah."
Scrubs
"Betty."
Scrubs
"well, it became pretty obvious that Betty had already made a decision."
Scrubs
"What impressed me most about Jake,"
Scrubs
"He thinks I'm cute. He thinks I'm cute."
Scrubs
"He didn't run because he was scared of facing his own feelings."
Scrubs
"I'm a lawyer. I'm suing you."
Scrubs
"See, that's summing up in a weird way. Yeah."
Scrubs
"You're sent from the future to destroy me."
Scrubs
"Gesundheit, Carol."
Scrubs
"I don't know, J.D. What I do know is I'm about to go down to my truck,"
Scrubs
"get my kayak paddle, and go Greg Barton on your ass."
Scrubs
"- Who's Barton? - Famous kayaker."
Scrubs
"I know."
Scrubs
"This is the most painful thing I've done,"
Scrubs
"My shop teacher thought scars were sexy, but that's a whole other story."
Scrubs
"Your advice really worked and I'd appreciate some more help."
Scrubs
"Let me just finish writing this prescription,"
Scrubs
"- He doesn't have one. - Exactly. But what does he have?"
Scrubs
"I didn't do this. Kelso did!"
Scrubs
"Did you break up Turner and Hooch?"
Scrubs
"I can't open up, man. I just can't do it."
Scrubs
"Maybe I should just go talk to him."
Scrubs
"Hey, Jake. How's it goin'?"
Scrubs
"But I'm already ignoring him. How do I ignore him more?"
Scrubs
"Elliot? I said how are you?"
Scrubs
"Trying to save lives. It's not always about you."
Scrubs
"You would not believe the day I'm having."
Scrubs
"All the live ones get a good look, they start toeing that line."
Scrubs
"You'll do whatever you want with your sister,"
Scrubs
"but Jake's trying to help."
Scrubs
"He's a stand-up guy, and I think you should leave him alone."
Scrubs
"There's an old man with Alzheimer's who no one bothers to come visit."
Scrubs
"She's six months pregnant."
Scrubs
"When's the last time you saw a glimpse of humanity in this place?"
Scrubs
"Anyway, I knew what I had to do."
Scrubs
"I walked into a black-tie dinner as Clarence Thomas."
Scrubs
"Well, that's just bad timing."
Scrubs
"Well, look who's back."
Scrubs
"It's amazing how a selfless gesture can affect so many people."
Scrubs
"One man was pushed to make the right decision."
Scrubs
"The NHL is on strike, and I'm not getting my fill of toothless men"
Scrubs
"Believe whatever you want. I don't really care."
Scrubs
"...invite him out for a cup of coffee before he escapes."
Scrubs
"- Yeah. That'd be nice. - Great."
Scrubs
"As for me, seeing Jake come back and do the right thing"
Scrubs
"And don't you forget who put that tyre on"
Scrubs
"OK, sweetie, have fun at the swap meet. Drive safe."
Scrubs
"Yep, it sure feels good to do the right thing."
Scrubs
"One of the reasons Turk and I are so popular around here"
Scrubs
"is we love helping our fellow doctors."
Scrubs
"I'll cross-cover Dr Turner's patients"
Scrubs
"Who's doing the endoscopy on Mr Schindler?"
Scrubs
"- Turner and Hooch! - Turner and Hooch!"
Scrubs
"Everyone hates you guys."
Scrubs
"- Would you like to talk about that? - No, not really."
Scrubs
"partly because Carla and I accidentally kissed and messed things up,"
Scrubs
"I'm sure he lived a wonderful life"
Scrubs
"Was he lucky enough to enjoy a washer and dryer in his unit"
Scrubs
"Ever mention any hot neighbours?"
Scrubs
"Nothing."
Scrubs
"Thankfully, Turk got over the kissing."
Scrubs
"Do you guys think that Clarissa is more attractive than me?"
Scrubs
"Yes."
Scrubs
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