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Clips from Scrubs - My Identity Crisis (S07E07)

""but now thanks to the Janitor"
Scrubs
"Oh, my God! You finally have a nickname!"
Scrubs
"I can admit when I'm wrong."
Scrubs
"by the end of the day."
Scrubs
"and lying in the foetal position, I still managed to memorize"
Scrubs
"So how about a little wager?"
Scrubs
"If I win, you have to do my job for a day."
Scrubs
"How is that fair?"
Scrubs
"Deal."
Scrubs
"Do you know how?"
Scrubs
"I'm okay. Actually, I'm just looking for Carla."
Scrubs
"Me. I need help."
Scrubs
"Okay, Dr John "I think I'm a man of the people"
Scrubs
""but now thanks to the Janitor"
Scrubs
"Perfect. Pretend you hate the nickname so it'll stick."
Scrubs
"He's a doctor. I think it's Patrick or Paul."
Scrubs
"It's Gwen. Although she does have a mean case of man-face."
Scrubs
"Dr Cox, I just want to throw this out there."
Scrubs
"It feels really good to be your student again."
Scrubs
"Take that back"
Scrubs
"or I'm going to shove every one of these Polaroids down your throat."
Scrubs
"Back to best friends it is."
Scrubs
"You know what you should use? Mnemonic devices."
Scrubs
"Associate the person's name with something about them."
Scrubs
"I do it all of the time."
Scrubs
"Like this guy."
Scrubs
"Look at him."
Scrubs
"Now there's no way he's ever going to make love to a woman"
Scrubs
"unless that woman is dead and dead rhymes with Ted."
Scrubs
"Ted."
Scrubs
"That's how most people remember it."
Scrubs
"What was your mnemonic device for remembering my name?"
Scrubs
"No."
Scrubs
"Okay, you're in it now. Go for broke."
Scrubs
"that I'm not just a colleague, I'm a friend."
Scrubs
"Oh, my God. Is this what Heaven's like?"
Scrubs
"It has nothing to do with me being lonely."
Scrubs
"How dumb do you think I am?"
Scrubs
"You just don't get what's really bothering me."
Scrubs
"A couple days ago, you dreamed in English."
Scrubs
"I feel like I'm losing all connections to what makes me me, you know?"
Scrubs
"how will I ever be able to pass it on to lzzy?"
Scrubs
"they only see your little African princess."
Scrubs
"- That's not true. - Oh, really? Watch."
Scrubs
"Sir, what race would you say this baby is?"
Scrubs
"Then again, I am the new hospital geneticist."
Scrubs
"That's just bad luck, baby."
Scrubs
"What the hell is wrong with me?"
Scrubs
"Well, luckily you have a lot of very close,"
Scrubs
"I feel like I'm losing track of my identity."
Scrubs
"a lot of people found themselves asking the same question."
Scrubs
"This one's for the ladies."
Scrubs
"Who are you?"
Scrubs
"Who are you?"
Scrubs
"Who am I?"
Scrubs
"Who are you? You"
Scrubs
"to your wife and kids?"
Scrubs
"I like the way I was."
Scrubs
"- Yes, I love that guy. - Me, too."
Scrubs
"What is so funny?"
Scrubs
"Baby, all your ring tones are bachata music."
Scrubs
"You're the only nurse in this hospital who demands that any doctor"
Scrubs
"and life is moving at a really, really fast pace but, baby,"
Scrubs
"you're always gonna be a Latina with an upside down exclamation point."
Scrubs
"And action."
Scrubs
"All right, he looks like a serial killer, which is a kind of cereal"
Scrubs
"I saw him without his pants on once"
Scrubs
"and he has crazy, skinny legs like French fries."
Scrubs
"French fries are sold at McDonald's, whose founder is Ronald McDonald."
Scrubs
"Ronald."
Scrubs
"You saw him without his pants on once."
Scrubs
"That's popcorn magnate Orville Redenbacher."
Scrubs
"No!"
Scrubs
"Some boring medical lecture."
Scrubs
"I miss you, too, Daddy!"
Scrubs
"Colonel Doctor. I call him that"
Scrubs
"KFC makes coleslaw."
Scrubs
"Coleman Slawski. Incidentally, my favourite name ever."
Scrubs
"That's correct. But you also lost the bet."
Scrubs
"- What are you talking about? I won. - Nope."
Scrubs
"That's not fair. Nobody knows your name."
Scrubs
"Fine, you win."
Scrubs
"It's like this ammonia is seeping into my brain and making me violent"
Scrubs
"and angry and hateful."
Scrubs
"I'll finally have a baby."
Scrubs
"Clear!"
Scrubs
"I mean, I did, until someone thought it'd be funny"
Scrubs
"Really? Did he also tell you to take your trunks off, Turk?"
Scrubs
"Surround myself with them, hoping they would protect me."
Scrubs
"You love being edgy, don't you?"
Scrubs
"Life is so much easier if you just connect with people."
Scrubs
"Hey, Teddy."
Scrubs
"'Cause you know I don't understand it."
Scrubs
"And when he comes back, the three of us..."
Scrubs
"Hola, Carla."
Scrubs
"Yeah, that was me."
Scrubs
"See? This is why we're a great couple."
Scrubs
"Wonder what he's gonna do."
Scrubs
"Don't know. Always have."
Scrubs
"Here we go, Carla and Turk are at it again."
Scrubs
"Any second now..."
Scrubs
"You know what? Why don't you get me a deep-dish pizza,"
Scrubs
"Say, Bob, sorry about that "go to hell" thing earlier."
Scrubs
"Straight?"
Scrubs
"But once you've heard it a few times, you're gonna love it."
Scrubs
"Challenge, what's their real name?"
Scrubs
"How can you know nothing about your own background?"
Scrubs
"It does so."
Scrubs
"Hello, tall, dark and"
Scrubs
"You're gonna learn 310 names in one day?"
Scrubs
"And after I was done crying and dry-heaving"
Scrubs
"Well, you look like you could use some help."
Scrubs
"Get the hell out of the way!"
Scrubs
"Hey, wait a second. Isn't today your day off?"
Scrubs
"I'm related to the guy who invented peanuts."
Scrubs
"They think she's black, not half-black, half-Latina."
Scrubs
"Oh, half black, half Latina, most likely Dominican origin."
Scrubs
"- J.D., stop it. - No, you stop it!"
Scrubs
"Who are you?"
Scrubs
"- That won't end well for you. - Okay,"
Scrubs
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