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Clips from The Simpsons - Four Regrettings and a Funeral (S25E25)

"No sex without a ring."
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"Get your own couch."
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"He regretted that the high school long jump record he set"
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"Let us pray."
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"Eh, everyone has regrets."
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"You? Your marriage is a dead fish"
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"floating in a tank of stale beer."
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"Let us kneel."
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"Could Bart have been prenatally screwed up"
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"♪ Get down! Everybody's gonna leave their seats ♪"
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"♪ You got to lose your mind in Detroit Rock City. ♪"
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"Overstay my welcome for 40 years?"
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"This is Kent Brockman..."
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"We'll have more regrets at 11:00 tonight"
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"following an all-new bottle of scotch."
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"Oh, I'm thinking about it!"
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"Mm..."
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"Oh... that's the coolest bowling ball"
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"I have no regrets."
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"Uh... uh... uh..."
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"My pants, like the Lord, work in mysterious ways."
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"Return those vestments."
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"How many times will you make that mistake?"
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"Just put on the KISS record."
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"Which one? Anything from Love Gun."
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"Ah, reckless youth. He'll be okay."
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"Lilah ran a little crepe stand in the seventh arrondissement."
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"Seeing you there, in the sweet light of Paris between the wars,"
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"Oh! Not that."
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"When you say "others," could they be bars of gold?"
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"as good as you are evil."
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"Hm. It looked a lot better in my memory."
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"Uh, but you know what, Smithers?"
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"I will find Lilah and win her back."
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"And Stalin."
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"Hello, Kent."
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"I was flying from DC to New York and, of course,"
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"Look, let's get this out of the way-- just because we both"
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"worked at Channel 6 and you made it big and I didn't"
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"the most important mistake you ever made..."
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"after this break."
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"but you were suckling the dual teats"
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"of infotainment and celebrifawning."
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"Great. We have a clip. No! No, don't show it."
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"There aren't five good seconds in the whole film."
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"I'm not a newsman anymore, I'm a geologist."
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"I keep discovering a new rock bottom."
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"Kent, I think I found my ticket out of this town."
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"We can share blazers."
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"Willikers! In my three years of soft news,"
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"It would explode if people gripped the wheel too tightly."
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"I'm going to cable."
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"Cable news!"
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"and black guys on weekends."
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"This little piggy's afraid to leave his cushy"
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"anchorman slop trough."
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"Could you, uh, phrase that a little more nicely?"
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"tracking Santa's flight from the North Pole."
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"being mad at you last week."
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"but she's a nun."
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"Now, since you're so good at finding things, find the exit."
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"There is the little matter of my fee."
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"Who moved my desk?!"
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"Now, when a Republican is in trouble..."
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"I'm going back to my sweet little town"
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"so I'm getting you shined up nice."
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"Oh!"
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"No, no, I didn't ask you to do that, Siri. I..."
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"Calm down, you're not gonna die up here."
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"I've saved myself for you."
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"Well, then, uh..."
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"Child in danger with exciting visuals!"
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"This kid's corpse could be"
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"my magic carpet. Get me a cameraman!"
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"A local boy clings to life in a story"
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"Ay, caramba!"
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"that I control with my mind. Amen."
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"Oh, Lilah."
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"It's all my fault."
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"and he can't even open a refrigerator."
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"Pushing, always... always pushing."
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"Kid's scared to flush. Think's it's his brother."
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"Oh, I've got a long-shot idea."
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"And anything else you could ever think of."
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"Bart! Bart! Bart!"
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"Bart! Bart! Bart!"
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"Would you guys knock it off? He's down safe already."
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"Sorry, Chief, that was me putting it down."
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"Back to you, Rachel Maddow."
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"to make up Joe Scarborough on Monday morning."
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"Hah!"
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"Shh!"
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"Damn it!"
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"Mm."
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"What the...?! Hey, whoa!"
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"What about us, man?"
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"Poor Chip. Such a big part of everyone's life."
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"People called him the "sixth Simpson.""
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"Chip did such a wonderful job with my biography."
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"Chip was the life of Sector 6-F at the nuclear plant,"
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"but Chip once confessed to me he did have a few regrets."
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"Chip regretted never ascending"
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"Mount Springfield from the south face."
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"was wind-aided."
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"He often spoke of that asterisk."
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"He never broke par on hole 17 at Springfield Mini Golf."
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"Your baby's addicted to pacifiers."
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"And your son is out of control."
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"Ow! My knees!"
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"40 years of healing, gone!"
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"Although Dickens was pretty well behaved."
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"He's been screwed up since the moment Homer's DNA"
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"staggered into your womb."
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"I have no regrets about that."
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"It was a perfect pregnancy."
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"Didn't smoke, didn't drink, lost three pounds."
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"And every night before bed,"
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"Homer would give me a little kiss..."
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"♪ Get up! Everybody's gonna move their feet ♪"
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"Huh?"
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