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Clips from Mr. Mayor - Respect in the Workplace (S01E01)

"one pulled chicken, zesty guac;"
Mr. Mayor
"."
Mr. Mayor
"- Sorry, sorry, sorry."
Mr. Mayor
"[car alarm chirps]"
Mr. Mayor
"I was in the little boys' room,"
Mr. Mayor
"- Yeah. Hey, Mikaela."
Mr. Mayor
"where it is okay to take out your penis."
Mr. Mayor
"Hi. I'm the mayor."
Mr. Mayor
"Sorry. No, I'm here."
Mr. Mayor
"- Hi. Susan Craw. I didn't expect you to be here."
Mr. Mayor
"I'm just having a bit of a rough start to the day."
Mr. Mayor
"Usually the big shots don't show up to these things."
Mr. Mayor
"Yeah, no, my cat threw up in the bathtub"
Mr. Mayor
"- Yeah, sir, I was just gonna use the autopen"
Mr. Mayor
"while I was in it."
Mr. Mayor
"to sign you in."
Mr. Mayor
"Hold on."
Mr. Mayor
"Come on."
Mr. Mayor
"- Are you kidding? No, no."
Mr. Mayor
"What?"
Mr. Mayor
"This is important stuff, very important."
Mr. Mayor
"Okay, I'm coming!"
Mr. Mayor
"I have a daughter, and I wanna get this right for her sake."
Mr. Mayor
"- Right. Right. Yes."
Mr. Mayor
"I'm coming!"
Mr. Mayor
"Okay, so I usually begin by showing a video"
Mr. Mayor
"of a common workplace scenario."
Mr. Mayor
"[quirky music]"
Mr. Mayor
"♪"
Mr. Mayor
"- A video? Huh."
Mr. Mayor
"[screams]"
Mr. Mayor
"So you don't use my illustrations anymore?"
Mr. Mayor
"[horn beeps]"
Mr. Mayor
"- No, we do not. Okay."
Mr. Mayor
"[grunts]"
Mr. Mayor
"- [sighs]"
Mr. Mayor
"It's food truck day."
Mr. Mayor
"- Oh, hi, Michelle. What's wrong?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Someone hung a cartoon in the break room"
Mr. Mayor
"[laughs]"
Mr. Mayor
"that upset me, Carlos."
Mr. Mayor
"It's food truck day! [laughs]"
Mr. Mayor
"- The one about Asians being good at math?"
Mr. Mayor
"[bright music]"
Mr. Mayor
"Tell your supervisor."
Mr. Mayor
"- I don't wanna be a squeaky wheel."
Mr. Mayor
"♪"
Mr. Mayor
"- I feel harassed by the acting in these."
Mr. Mayor
"- There's so much old junk in these drawers."
Mr. Mayor
"Look at this sad photo of city council from the '50s."
Mr. Mayor
"- What kind of business is this supposed to be?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Wow. No one looks like us."
Mr. Mayor
"The filing system makes zero sense."
Mr. Mayor
"- Oh, I don't know."
Mr. Mayor
"- Hey, Barbara, did Gunther email you"
Mr. Mayor
"That guy second from the left kinda looks like you,"
Mr. Mayor
"but he doesn't have the leg meat"
Mr. Mayor
"his latest bodybuilding photos?"
Mr. Mayor
"to almost pull off these pants."
Mr. Mayor
"- Yes. Again."
Mr. Mayor
"Those photos make me uncomfortable."
Mr. Mayor
"- [laughs]"
Mr. Mayor
"I asked him not to send them to me anymore."
Mr. Mayor
"Thank you. They're H&M single-use."
Mr. Mayor
"- Aww. That's how my parents met."
Mr. Mayor
"- It's food truck day! [laughs]"
Mr. Mayor
"- And I asked him to stop giving me backrubs."
Mr. Mayor
"- What? What is he saying?"
Mr. Mayor
"- [panting] Food...truck...day."
Mr. Mayor
"- [sighs] [cell phone chimes]"
Mr. Mayor
"It's the most best day of the month."
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, no!"
Mr. Mayor
"Food trucks come from all over and they park outside"
Mr. Mayor
"I just got an email"
Mr. Mayor
"that Gunther is taking you off the Suncoast account."
Mr. Mayor
"and there's gonna be banh mi and poke bowls"
Mr. Mayor
"- That's my biggest account!"
Mr. Mayor
"and, fingers crossed..."
Mr. Mayor
"- Susan, Susan, could you pause it for a second?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Okay, I don't have time to address"
Mr. Mayor
"I've already got so many questions."
Mr. Mayor
"how weird your fingers are."
Mr. Mayor
"Okay, now, of course, backrubs are inappropriate,"
Mr. Mayor
"- Empanada Acoso."
Mr. Mayor
"but what about side hugs?"
Mr. Mayor
"They drive in all the way from Riverside,"
Mr. Mayor
"Those are okay, right,"
Mr. Mayor
"and their empanadas are like soft, spicy full diapers"
Mr. Mayor
"because your privates are parallel."
Mr. Mayor
"for your tongue."
Mr. Mayor
"- I'm sure you're a great hugger,"
Mr. Mayor
"- Oh, my God, could we actually get"
Mr. Mayor
"decent lunch food for once?"
Mr. Mayor
"but it's probably best not to hug anyone."
Mr. Mayor
"We'll go down right after training."
Mr. Mayor
"- Could I ask to touch a white man's hair?"
Mr. Mayor
"- After what?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Just--just don't."
Mr. Mayor
"- 'Cause what if he's gay? Yeah. Shoot. Of course."
Mr. Mayor
"- Today's our mandatory"
Mr. Mayor
""respect in the workplace" training session."
Mr. Mayor
"My point being there's always an exception"
Mr. Mayor
"if you think about it."
Mr. Mayor
"- [sighs] Oh, no!"
Mr. Mayor
"- Shut up, shut up, shut up. - [muttering]"
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, those things take forever!"
Mr. Mayor
"- Shut up."
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, and then you can't leave until you pass a test,"
Mr. Mayor
"and by then, all the food trucks are out of food,"
Mr. Mayor
"- Yes, I guess that would be an exception,"
Mr. Mayor
"but I don't think anyone is going to ask you"
Mr. Mayor
"so they're just trucks again!"
Mr. Mayor
"to "help them breastfeed.""
Mr. Mayor
"I mean, I love trucks, but--"
Mr. Mayor
"So does anybody else have any questions?"
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, God, today is an emotional Minions ride."
Mr. Mayor
"- Dude, it'll be fast. - Yeah, we're young. We get it."
Mr. Mayor
"- Oh, sorry, I do. Yeah."
Mr. Mayor
"I have a list of words"
Mr. Mayor
"- Yeah, we watch a video, ask no questions,"
Mr. Mayor
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