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Clips from Modern Family (2009) - Mother's Day (S02E02)

"when I say thank you for everything you do while we're off having affairs."
Modern Family (2009)
"- I'm kidding. I'll pay for that later."
Modern Family (2009)
"Let's get the moms and kids together for a picture."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Let's get out of here. Leave the stroller and run. - Cam, stop."
Modern Family (2009)
"- No one's going to ask you to... Cameron, get on up here!"
Modern Family (2009)
"I don't know. You guys just go ahead there."
Modern Family (2009)
"- You're an honorary mom. Come on. I don't know."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Okay, all right. Unhand me. - Get over there."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, yeah, yeah. - Okay, tighten up. Tighten up."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Up here, ladies."
Modern Family (2009)
"Beautiful. One more, gals."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Oh, thanks, ladies. Thanks so much. Perfect."
Modern Family (2009)
"Yeah, that was definitely poison oak. I think this rash is spreading."
Modern Family (2009)
"Ay, Manny, that's not a rash. It's red because you scratch it."
Modern Family (2009)
"I just don't want my throat to close."
Modern Family (2009)
"Wouldn't be the worst thing."
Modern Family (2009)
"I'm so bored, I'd rather be reading."
Modern Family (2009)
"I'm so bored, I chewed the last bug that flew in my mouth just to feel something."
Modern Family (2009)
"I'm so bored, I'm talking to you."
Modern Family (2009)
"For the last 20 minutes, all you people have done is whine."
Modern Family (2009)
"You would think on Mother's Day, at least, you would have something nice..."
Modern Family (2009)
"Shh! - What?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Thought I heard a coyote. Go ahead."
Modern Family (2009)
"At least I don't look like an idiot."
Modern Family (2009)
"- What does that mean? - Your hat."
Modern Family (2009)
"It looks like you walked under a bird that poops ugly hats."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Can we watch the language? - There's nothing else to watch."
Modern Family (2009)
"Enough complaining!"
Modern Family (2009)
"Come on."
Modern Family (2009)
"No. No, no. L... I'm giving myself a Mother's Day present."
Modern Family (2009)
"Kids, your hike is over."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Yes! - Yeah! - All right!"
Modern Family (2009)
"No. No, not happy. Bad."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Hmm. - Sad."
Modern Family (2009)
"Gloria and I are gonna go finish this beautiful hike together..."
Modern Family (2009)
"while you sit here and think about how selfish and thoughtless you've been."
Modern Family (2009)
"Come on."
Modern Family (2009)
"If we're thoughtless, how can we think?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Let's go."
Modern Family (2009)
"- What the hell are those? - Onion goggles."
Modern Family (2009)
"No more tears when I cook. Welcome to the 21 st century. You should get a pair."
Modern Family (2009)
"I was gonna suggest the same thing."
Modern Family (2009)
"Hey, Jay, you know what we should put in this?"
Modern Family (2009)
"- We should add a... - No. It's my mom's recipe."
Modern Family (2009)
"Whatever it says on the page goes in the pot. Nothing more, nothing less."
Modern Family (2009)
"Now, how long do I stir the beef and sausages? Read it to me."
Modern Family (2009)
""We should stir the beef and sausages for five minutes.""
Modern Family (2009)
"And how much longer do I have to listen to the Julia Child impression?"
Modern Family (2009)
"For as long as it's still funny."
Modern Family (2009)
"I think the timer just went off on that."
Modern Family (2009)
"That was unnecessary."
Modern Family (2009)
"Hey, Jay, maybe after this, we should make the perfect mom."
Modern Family (2009)
"All we need is a tablespoon of love, one cup of warmth."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Add one heart, softened. - What the hell are you talking about?"
Modern Family (2009)
"This recipe for the perfect mom, by Jay Francis Pritchett, age nine."
Modern Family (2009)
"Geez, I forgot all about that."
Modern Family (2009)
"I didn't know she had that in there."
Modern Family (2009)
"- What's that, Francis? - Nothing."
Modern Family (2009)
"- How much longer on the meat? - Ohh."
Modern Family (2009)
"I love this part about "serves one small boy." It's adorable."
Modern Family (2009)
"Wow. A hundred and seventy five pounds of tenderness."
Modern Family (2009)
"She must have loved that. Big woman?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Jay?"
Modern Family (2009)
"And that's when I saw it."
Modern Family (2009)
"Jay?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Are..."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Are you crying? - No. It's the onions, damn it. Give me these."
Modern Family (2009)
"- What are you looking at? - Nothing."
Modern Family (2009)
"Those really frame your face."
Modern Family (2009)
"Ay, thank you."
Modern Family (2009)
"Okay, I don't want you to judge me, but I have to say something."
Modern Family (2009)
"Sometimes I wanna punch my kids."
Modern Family (2009)
"- You don't mean that. - No, I do. I do."
Modern Family (2009)
"The last time they were horrible the way they were today..."
Modern Family (2009)
"they happened to be all lined up..."
Modern Family (2009)
"and I couldn't help but think if I hit just one of 'em..."
Modern Family (2009)
"the rest would go down like dominoes."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Geez. - I know."
Modern Family (2009)
"That would rob me of the pleasure..."
Modern Family (2009)
"of hitting each one individually, but..."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, my God. You don't talk about your children this way."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, come on. You know Manny irritates you."
Modern Family (2009)
"No. Manny is the best thing that ever happened to me. We have a special bond."
Modern Family (2009)
"Yes. Bonds. I know. But that's not what I'm talking about now."
Modern Family (2009)
"Claire, for a long time, it was only the two of us."
Modern Family (2009)
"I cannot say anything bad about that boy."
Modern Family (2009)
"Give me a break."
Modern Family (2009)
"Gloria, anybody who's ever had a kid knows..."
Modern Family (2009)
"that they can irritate the freaking life out of you at some point."
Modern Family (2009)
"Am I right?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh. Okay."
Modern Family (2009)
"- What? - Manny."
Modern Family (2009)
"He's persnickety. It drives me up the wall."
Modern Family (2009)
"Okay. Persnickety. Good start."
Modern Family (2009)
"- And he follows me around all the time. - Mm-hmm."
Modern Family (2009)
"Sometimes I love it, but sometimes I need my own space."
Modern Family (2009)
"This does not make you a bad mother to admit these things..."
Modern Family (2009)
"And the poetry... it's not very good."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Ha. - First time that I say that out loud."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Okay."
Modern Family (2009)
"- It's not very good! - Wow."
Modern Family (2009)
"- I love Manny. - Right."
Modern Family (2009)
"But sometimes I... Just be a boy."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Go outside. Kick a ball. Steal something. - Oh..."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Yeah."
Modern Family (2009)
"I was talking about another Manny that I know long time ago."
Modern Family (2009)
"Diablo."
Modern Family (2009)
"Manny!"
Modern Family (2009)
"You know, more people have died hiking than in the entire Civil War."
Modern Family (2009)
"Okay, what book did you read that in?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Book? Wake up and smell the Internet, grandma."
Modern Family (2009)
"You know Mom's just gonna want us to apologize."
Modern Family (2009)
"Well, we did kind of ruin her Mother's Day."
Modern Family (2009)
"No. She ruined her Mother's Day."
Modern Family (2009)
"She took us to a place she knew we wouldn't like..."
Modern Family (2009)
"and then we complained for, like, a second and we're the bad guys?"
Modern Family (2009)
"That's a good point. You ever get the feeling she does this intentionally?"
Modern Family (2009)
"- Why would she do that? - So she can make us feel guilty."
Modern Family (2009)
"Exactly. And the next time we're choosing what to do, she gets her way again."
Modern Family (2009)
"And the next time and the next time..."
Modern Family (2009)
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