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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - Band or DJ? (S08E08)

"marking a truly happy time for our little group."
How I Met Your Mother
"Marvin will not stop crying."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Chuckles] Sorry. I haven't slept in..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Food going in isn't the problem."
How I Met Your Mother
"Normally, the kid's a confetti machine."
How I Met Your Mother
"And with that image, dinner is done."
How I Met Your Mother
"Here comes the bride! Now the annoying part, right?"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Chuckles] Planning the wedding."
How I Met Your Mother
"First thing we need to do is set a date."
How I Met Your Mother
"May 25, 2013."
How I Met Your Mother
"Thank you, Ted. The ladies are talking."
How I Met Your Mother
"And, well, uh..."
How I Met Your Mother
"- That's a big binder. - Oh, this?"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ ♪ [Upbeat Pop]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Barney's fine. It's just, well, earlier this morning..."
How I Met Your Mother
"we have got to stop interrupting each other all the time."
How I Met Your Mother
"As some of you know, my dad is a little scary."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, vampire in the daylight. Vampire in the daylight!"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Robin] Oh."
How I Met Your Mother
"And then it got really scary."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, right. You... You haven't met Carol."
How I Met Your Mother
"Um, very special woman."
How I Met Your Mother
"Forty-eight years old, dental hygienist, no kids."
How I Met Your Mother
"This man is blond."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, great. You're all here. Let's talk about our wedding band."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Mouthing Words]"
How I Met Your Mother
"And it turns out "spaghettis" are men."
How I Met Your Mother
"- He said no? - Yeah, I don't know what we're gonna do."
How I Met Your Mother
"You have my attention."
How I Met Your Mother
"Barney, when I wanted to marry Robin's mother..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I gave the pelts and the bear meat..."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, no, no. Don't do it, Robin."
How I Met Your Mother
"- You don't want to see what's behind that door. - What are you talking about?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Never mind the embarrassing cheerleading photos from high school."
How I Met Your Mother
"Begged my mom to burn those."
How I Met Your Mother
"No good can come from accepting that friend request."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Sighs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"He was the runt of the litter, but he persevered."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, give me this. Give it to me!"
How I Met Your Mother
"Yes, uh, Carol and I were in Key Largo..."
How I Met Your Mother
"And, uh, well, one thing led to the other..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Fluffernutter peed all over my pants!"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Marvin Crying]"
How I Met Your Mother
"The big deal is, Robin deserves better than some crappy, unreliable band."
How I Met Your Mother
"They... They cheat. They deceive."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Are you a cop? - I'm not a cop!"
How I Met Your Mother
"Today, we're gonna braid friendship bracelets."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Shouts] - [Grunts]"
How I Met Your Mother
"There's a very simple explana... Ah!"
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Bleating] - [Choking]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Hey, Schmosby. Remember when you dookied in your pants down by the lake?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Oh! - [Laughing]"
How I Met Your Mother
"and found out Robin was engaged, it was like..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I am happy for them."
How I Met Your Mother
"if slightly constipated, little boy..."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Ted Narrating] And, no, it wasn't confetti."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm sorry for getting married without consulting you."
How I Met Your Mother
"But if that's the price for my daughter's love..."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Sighs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Come to the wedding. Give me away."
How I Met Your Mother
"- He didn't say that? - No."
How I Met Your Mother
"- For God's sakes, Ted. - Hear me out."
How I Met Your Mother
"You really don't know me, do you?"
How I Met Your Mother
"We just had brunch with my ex-roommate."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Do you know any deejays? - Dude, come on!"
How I Met Your Mother
"All right, all right, all right. Well, I guess, uh... [Chuckles]"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ ♪ [Band: Rock Ballad]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Because if Robin and Barney had taken my stupid advice and hired a deejay..."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Ted Narrating] Kids, in late 2012..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I received a very important text message."
How I Met Your Mother
"Uncle Barney and Aunt Robin were engaged..."
How I Met Your Mother
"The problem was... one of us was definitely not happy."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Crying, Squealing]"
How I Met Your Mother
"What do you guys think it is? Is he hungry?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, that must be it."
How I Met Your Mother
"Huh! Thank you for thinking of that, Ted."
How I Met Your Mother
"And here we were just watering him and facing him towards the sunlight."
How I Met Your Mother
"January."
How I Met Your Mother
"It's what's coming out... or not coming out."
How I Met Your Mother
"- He hasn't pooped in three days. - Yeah."
How I Met Your Mother
"Normally, I wouldn't wish one of his dirty diapers on my worst enemy..."
How I Met Your Mother
"but now I kind of miss poppin' the hood in the morning..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and finding that first big, juicy, black..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Lily! I'm eating chili."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm eating chili, Lily."
How I Met Your Mother
"Confetti."
How I Met Your Mother
"Big blast of confetti."
How I Met Your Mother
"He's Rip Taylor in a diaper."
How I Met Your Mother
"I have a feeling at this point, Rip Taylor is Rip Taylor in a diaper."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Hey, guys. - Well, well, well."
How I Met Your Mother
"- So not fun, right? - I don't know. I'm kind of looking forward to it."
How I Met Your Mother
"Fine. I'll do it for you."
How I Met Your Mother
"Actually, that... that is the date."
How I Met Your Mother
"Ted offered to help with the planning a little."
How I Met Your Mother
"This is just cakes."
How I Met Your Mother
"Anyway, we're having the ceremony..."
How I Met Your Mother
"at that beautiful little church out on Long Island..."
How I Met Your Mother
"where Victoria almost got married... lovely spot."
How I Met Your Mother
"And then we're gonna have a reception in a big white tent..."
How I Met Your Mother
"on the front lawn of the hotel."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, and, uh, the colors are cream and lilac."
How I Met Your Mother
"- I'm-a cut you, bitch! - Oh, Lily, Lily, L-Lily..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm cool. I'm cool."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hey, Robin, where's Barney? Did he skip town already?"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Chuckles] If so, exactly what time was it?"
How I Met Your Mother
"It's important for the over-under."
How I Met Your Mother
"So, it's been three days since I said yes."
How I Met Your Mother
"True."
How I Met Your Mother
"And your panic attacks are getting shorter and further apart."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Inhales] I can't do this! I feel like I'm drowning!"
How I Met Your Mother
"Also true."
How I Met Your Mother
"So I guess we're officially engaged."
How I Met Your Mother
"I assume my dad already knows. You did call him and got his permission, right?"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughing] Yeah, yeah, Robin."
How I Met Your Mother
"I... I bought you with an ox and some spices from the East."
How I Met Your Mother
"He's gonna put you in a cage..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and send you on horseback to my remote desert camp."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Okay, Barney... - Hold on. I'm not done."
How I Met Your Mother
"Where you'll be bathed in perfumes and oils..."
How I Met Your Mother
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