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Clips from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005) - Paddy's Has a Jumper (S14E14)

"-CHARLIE: Oh... -MAC: Oh."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Exactly. So why don't we start with "Could he?" Charlie?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Okay, great. (clears throat) -Do the thing."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"All right. So, what we have here"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"is I made a little Paddy's Pub."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-All right. -Ah."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Uh, I do. I do."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Uh, luckily I brought an egg to work today."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Oh! Look at that guy. -All right, so when the guys falls,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"what would happen to the jumper when..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-I think he's gonna smash. -Y-Yeah, okay."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Here we go. -So, he's up here and he's saying, "Oh,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Yeah, Dee, what would you say in this situation? -DEE: Well, I don't think"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"he's sad, I think he's happy to get off this merry-go-round."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-That's so pathetic. I'd never... I would never... -That you would know that."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-DENNIS: Oh. -CHARLIE: Okay."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Mm-hmm. -...he'll be okay. -DEE: Hmm."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"If I'm being honest, I was hoping his entire skull"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-would just explode. -DENNIS: Right."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-for a bit of an explosion. Yeah. -Uh-huh."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"that the jumper's gonna die from this height."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"You know? So there's no reason for us to do anything about it."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Uh, I don't know about that, b-- I think the problem is, is that,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"you know, an egg, i-in this particular case,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"a-a hard-boiled egg, it's not really"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"an accurate representation of-of the human head"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Now, Charlie,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Yeah... -Do you happen to have an uncooked one?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Ugh. No. Unfortunately, that was the only one I found."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Well, yeah. I got hungry."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Oh... -Uh, we never got our fish and chips."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Nest? What? Charlie, where did you get this egg?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-DENNIS: Where'd you get the egg? -And why are you going around"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Well, it wasn't in-in a tree, it was in a hole."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-(retching): Oh, no... -Yeah. I mean,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-it's, like, a rat's egg or something. -(coughs)"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Dee's eaten some sort of a rat or a reptile's egg..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-(Dee groans) -...of some kind, or whatever it is, but..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"that accurately represents the human head, all right?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Otherwise, we're not gonna get the explosion that we want."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Oh, you know what, I might be able to get"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Mmm. Hmm?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Why does Frank keep a casaba melon in the safe?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Has he cut a hole in the rind,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"and then put it back on, like a plug?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Oh, yeah. -Oh."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Yeah, there's a little... -You guys think he's having sex with it?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Well... yeah. -He's definitely having sex with it."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Yeah. -Probably is."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"There's a guy stuck on the roof of Paddy's."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Oh, no, he's not stuck, he's a jumper."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"A jumper? You think you could die from that height?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Uh, well, inconclusive. Yeah."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Speaking of which, we need your casaba melon."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"FRANK: Whoa, hold it. What, what, what?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Stay away from my stuff."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Yeah, hey, man, why do you have a-a casaba melon in a safe?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-None of your goddamn business! -Banging it."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Damn it."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Dennis is touching my melon."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"No. I got to get in there."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Sir, move back. This area's cordoned off."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"There's a jumper on the roof."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"I got to get in there."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Oh, your son?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Yeah. -Come with me, sir."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-around the perimeter. -All right, here we go."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Well, yeah. Now, if we see splatter,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Okay, ready? Here we go. Five..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"ALL: Four, three,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Cricket. -Where did you come from?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"I was up on the roof getting eggs from a nest."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"I checked the hole, but it was empty."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Yeah, we know. -Oh, yeah, yeah. There's a guy, there's a jumper."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Guys, why the hell are you wasting"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"from falling off our roof, so..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Oh, no way. No."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"I've fallen off buildings before; I never die."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"And look at me. I'm doing great."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Yeah, but you're not really a trustworthy"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"control group, Cricket."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"I mean, you know, you're sort of subhuman"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"at this point, you know."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-For sure. -I don't know how"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"to squeeze that one into the algorithm."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Hey, I'm just going to, uh, take the casaba and head on out."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"(all protesting)"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"No, you're not, Cricket."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Get out! Go. -Fine."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Cricket actually just made me realize something."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"We already have data for this situation."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Maureen Ponderosa."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Now, she died from falling off a much shorter building."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Yeah, but you pushed her. -No, no, no, they never proved that."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"That was never proven."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"It was never even proven that she was pushed. Okay?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"But it was, I have to say, fortunate"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"that she landed on her head, you know."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Or at least he certainly made it look that way."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-He pushed her. -Yeah, he pushed her."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"No, I was following your threads."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Li-Listen, the point is, it's all about"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"how this guy falls, okay."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"'Cause if he falls feet first, he might break a couple bones,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"That'd be more of a cry for help, right?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Wouldn't you say, Dee? -Oh, absolutely. Yeah."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"But if the guy falls head first, now that'd be a death jump."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Right? So the answer to the question"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
""could he die from jumping?""
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Yeah, absolutely, if he did a death jump."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Okay, you're right. It's how he falls."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"would he jump, would he do it at all?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"what another human being would do?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"Right? How do you truly get to know someone?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Just go through their trash. -Sleep with them."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"-Oh. -Uh, talk to their priest,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"No. No."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"You just, uh..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"We're just gonna pull up Bryan O'Brien's social media page,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
"and we're gonna comb through that for any"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005)
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