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Clips from The League (2009) - Training Camp (S04E04)

"I think my punishment was enough when I got a full-on"
The League (2009)
"stroke. Hey, which one of y'all is Kevin? The one with the freakishly"
The League (2009)
"large head. Uh, what the hell is this?"
The League (2009)
"This is my new online cowboy business."
The League (2009)
"A division of Taco Corp. Do you have some bad news for"
The League (2009)
"someone? Hire a cowboy to deliver the message. Everything sounds better coming"
The League (2009)
"? Kevin, the money you loaned Taco he ain't payin' it back. ?"
The League (2009)
"I like it. I need Howdy Doody to tell me that."
The League (2009)
"Y'all have a good one. Bye."
The League (2009)
"I am going to make a fortune. No, you're not going to make"
The League (2009)
"a fortune. It's time to talk football."
The League (2009)
"Commissioner, please, what is our draft order this year?"
The League (2009)
"Um, I am no longer the Commissioner of this league."
The League (2009)
"Wait a second, if you're not the Commissioner, who is?"
The League (2009)
"Howdy, partners. Oh."
The League (2009)
"Oh, no, no. No, I told you, no cards."
The League (2009)
"You son of a bitch. So this is how you were able to"
The League (2009)
"hold onto your championship. By the way, I don't like the "C""
The League (2009)
"word, but this is collusion. It is not collusion because"
The League (2009)
"I'm Commissioner and I'm saying it's not collusion."
The League (2009)
"Kevin... you see what you've done here?"
The League (2009)
"The concept of total control is erotic to me."
The League (2009)
"I am at full chub right now."
The League (2009)
"So, how'd they take it?"
The League (2009)
"Not well. Yeah?"
The League (2009)
"Draft gonna be next weekend still?"
The League (2009)
"Indeed. Shit, draft me a beautiful team next weekend. Week after that, have a"
The League (2009)
"beautiful baby boy. And I get to name him?"
The League (2009)
"That was the deal. My beautiful boy."
The League (2009)
"I love you. I love you."
The League (2009)
"Uh-uh, uh-uh, no, no, no. Doo-doo-doo."
The League (2009)
"Come on, Kevin, I'm not gonna explode."
The League (2009)
"How big do you think you are, Kevin?"
The League (2009)
"I just feel like right now that tunnel is outbound traffic only. Really?"
The League (2009)
"you have tried to go inbound on many times."
The League (2009)
"traffic signs are very confusing."
The League (2009)
"Oh, come on, I miss it. I know, I miss it, too, I"
The League (2009)
"Look, look, look, look, look, look at the proximity here."
The League (2009)
"It's like they're whispering to each other."
The League (2009)
"Don't you miss it? I do."
The League (2009)
"Well, then, do something about it."
The League (2009)
"I tried watching pregnancy porn, but it just grossed me out more. Okay, okay."
The League (2009)
"Come on, just get comfortable."
The League (2009)
"You should be on bed rest."
The League (2009)
"Good night, my sweet love. Good night."
The League (2009)
"Did you say something?"
The League (2009)
"Guess what. What?"
The League (2009)
"I got a new job. Oh, look at that."
The League (2009)
"Congratulations, Pete. Got rid of that dead-end"
The League (2009)
"pencil-pushing job. No, no, not in life... in the"
The League (2009)
"league. Look, I figured, since the Sacko"
The League (2009)
"Commissioner was going dormant this year, I got myself a new"
The League (2009)
"title. I am the custodian of the hall of records. Custodian's fitting."
The League (2009)
"Look, the league web site has this thing called the "league""
The League (2009)
""history" and it's been criminally ignored."
The League (2009)
"Think that's where I send my lineup."
The League (2009)
"Well, that's why you don't have an actual lineup."
The League (2009)
"Anyhow, I filled our league history page with factoids and"
The League (2009)
"That's a pretty solid idea, Pete."
The League (2009)
"That's ni... oh, what the shit, man?"
The League (2009)
"It's a factoid. He posted naked pictures of me."
The League (2009)
"Well, yeah, it's really just a nice remembrance of the time"
The League (2009)
"when you used to get drunk in college and run errands naked."
The League (2009)
"Whoa, w-wait, what is this? "Women that Andre has slept""
The League (2009)
"No, no, no, this is not a complete list."
The League (2009)
"There's, like, only four people on here."
The League (2009)
"I-I have slept with plenty of women."
The League (2009)
"You guys see what Pete's doing?"
The League (2009)
"He can't torture one of us as the Sacko Commissioner, so he's"
The League (2009)
"going to torture all of us by being the custodian of the hall of records. Yes."
The League (2009)
"Custodian. Okay, you can't just make up jobs like this. Right, Commissioner?"
The League (2009)
"I am not your Commissioner. If you want to talk to me, you"
The League (2009)
"can refer to me as your league champion, and I have also made"
The League (2009)
"up some cards. Woo."
The League (2009)
"What, did you guys all get cards without me?"
The League (2009)
"Yep. Oh, Taco, who is "the Taco of""
The League (2009)
""the league.""
The League (2009)
"Hello? This is Jerry Jones with the Cowboys. Yeah, uh, o-okay, Jerry"
The League (2009)
"Jones. Yeah, and this is Dan Snyder."
The League (2009)
"This is Jerry Jones, owner of the Cowboys, and I need to speak"
The League (2009)
"to Taco. He owns something I want."
The League (2009)
"Um... it's Jerry Jones for Taco."
The League (2009)
"Jerry Jones of, like, the Dallas Cowboys Jerry Jones?"
The League (2009)
"if he'll be on the show. Dallas Cowboys. Oh."
The League (2009)
"was Dallas, and I was looking for a web site to start it and I"
The League (2009)
"squatted on dallascowboys.com, and I guess they let it lapse."
The League (2009)
"Wait, you own dallascowboys.com?"
The League (2009)
"Darn tootin'. What?!"
The League (2009)
"Hello? Hello? Hey! Hey! Put it on speaker, speaker, speaker. Hello? Hello?"
The League (2009)
"This is Taco, the person. I want that dallascowboys.com"
The League (2009)
"back, and I'm prepared to pay for it."
The League (2009)
"I don't do deals over the phone, Jerry."
The League (2009)
"Why don't I fly you and your friends to Cowboys training"
The League (2009)
"camp, watch a little practice, meet some players, we'll talk a"
The League (2009)
"little business. I can't imagine that my friends would want to... what?!"
The League (2009)
"Yes, we would! All right, fine."
The League (2009)
"My assistant, Marilyn, will call you back with the details."
The League (2009)
"Is Marilyn hot? What a bunch of morons."
The League (2009)
"I can't believe these frittatas get to go to camp and we can't go. I can't go."
The League (2009)
"Babe! You're gonna go into labor any minute... how can I"
The League (2009)
"leave you alone? Do you remember what we did"
The League (2009)
"to Ruxin last year? One of us has to make sure he"
The League (2009)
"You're going. If you are not gonna stay here and make love to"
The League (2009)
"this beautiful body... Oh... what do I do, what do I do? What are you gonna do?"
The League (2009)
"I'm gonna go. Thank you so much! Oh... Mm. I love you. I love you. Go. Have fun."
The League (2009)
"Okay. All right. Say hi to Jason Witten. I will."
The League (2009)
"So hot. Oh. I won't."
The League (2009)
"Good God."
The League (2009)
"What's up, guys? Hey, fellas. How you doing?"
The League (2009)
"Guys, ro-romo. Tony...!"
The League (2009)
"What's up, guy?"
The League (2009)
"I've always talked about going to a training camp, and here we"
The League (2009)
"Yeah. For, like, two or three years."
The League (2009)
"is even gonna be better because I have yelp'd one of the best"
The League (2009)
"Best sea urchin spots in all of Oxnard."
The League (2009)
"my meeting with Jerry Earl Jones."
The League (2009)
"It's Jerry Jones. Jerry Earl Jones."
The League (2009)
"No, James Earl Jones was Darth Vader."
The League (2009)
"Yeah. Darth Vader owns the Dallas Cowboys."
The League (2009)
"Okay, that's fine. Lawyers?"
The League (2009)
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