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Clips from American Dad! (2005) - Comedy (S01E01)

"But it should be mine!"
American Dad! (2005)
"You're all just a bunch ofusers like my parents. Get out! All ofyou!"
American Dad! (2005)
"- Well, come into the kitchen. - What up?"
American Dad! (2005)
"S, meet Spike Baltar."
American Dad! (2005)
"of RogertheAlien, and he's totally method."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Wow, I'm so happy I could die."
American Dad! (2005)
"- It's me. I gotta take this."
American Dad! (2005)
"And his voice-"
American Dad! (2005)
"I wrote RogertheAlien."
American Dad! (2005)
"on the set of a mustard commercial when I was nine."
American Dad! (2005)
""Bro-sickle," I'm your family now..."
American Dad! (2005)
"and this dude is never ever gonna leaveyou."
American Dad! (2005)
"Never."
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm comin', Steve! I'm comin'!"
American Dad! (2005)
"I didn't mean to kill you!"
American Dad! (2005)
"- Roger?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Wait. You were trying to kill me? So this is all your fault."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, yeah. Blame the alien. The cops will eat that up."
American Dad! (2005)
"where they're gonna takeyour cherry..."
American Dad! (2005)
"That was kind ofa screw"
American Dad! (2005)
"Ifit makes you feel any better, l was drowning all right-"
American Dad! (2005)
"I t sure is. And I 'm sorry l pushed you so hard."
American Dad! (2005)
"- One, two, heave!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Au revoir, stardom."
American Dad! (2005)
"Guess I'm clumsy like he wrote in the book."
American Dad! (2005)
"How doyou like that ending, Steve?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Bye! Have a great time!"
American Dad! (2005)
"I got a lot ofthings on my rise to stardom-"
American Dad! (2005)
"filled with cherryJell-O."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh-ho, no. This old horse has to get back to the stable."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, I see. Well, good night."
American Dad! (2005)
"Seriously, stare at the floor and count to a hundred!"
American Dad! (2005)
"who battles America's enemies by dropping red, white and blue turds ofjustice."
American Dad! (2005)
"Whatever, I'm not a writer."
American Dad! (2005)
"Got any ti ps for a young author?"
American Dad! (2005)
"And people are gonna know that."
American Dad! (2005)
"I doubt I could eat the amount l want to vomit."
American Dad! (2005)
"The turnout at today's book signing was awful..."
American Dad! (2005)
"the hottest children's book show in Langley Falls."
American Dad! (2005)
"Hmm. Is the boy gay?"
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm almost a star. Oh! There's my cell phone."
American Dad! (2005)
"Roger the clumsy alien!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Aw, I hate being a famous author."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, Steve, just curious."
American Dad! (2005)
"Well, I- l kind of hate it."
American Dad! (2005)
"Boo!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Steve Smith."
American Dad! (2005)
"I know I said no questions."
American Dad! (2005)
"Scintillating."
American Dad! (2005)
"Well, he's gonna learn that he's messing with the wrong muchacho."
American Dad! (2005)
"Bravo! Thatwas the gumball machine Henry Ford gave to Hitler."
American Dad! (2005)
"Great. Who tracked mud on my floor?"
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm Steve Smith. I was never molested..."
American Dad! (2005)
"That's not me in the pool. That's Spike Baltar."
American Dad! (2005)
"in the lunch line..."
American Dad! (2005)
"In a sea oftroubles."
American Dad! (2005)
"I t's good to have you back, Steve."
American Dad! (2005)
"From now on, the only thing I want recognition for is being a good dad. Ready?"
American Dad! (2005)
"- Oh, did I tie that to Steve's ankle?"
American Dad! (2005)
"And I can't believe this all began just a few weeks ago."
American Dad! (2005)
"I drink gallons ofvodka! I should be a star!"
American Dad! (2005)
""To Mr. Durban. Keep on rockin'. Yours in Christ.""
American Dad! (2005)
"Why are you failing my son? Answer me, dirtbag!"
American Dad! (2005)
"- We're gonna be huge. -Just how big areyou talking?"
American Dad! (2005)
"They areyour catch phrases. Roger, haveyou even read Steve's book?"
American Dad! (2005)
"So, how does it feel to be a superstar?"
American Dad! (2005)
"and I was finally free ofmyparents."
American Dad! (2005)
"I had rooms filled with the finest antiquities."
American Dad! (2005)
"Hopeyou don't mind me dropping by..."
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm Steve Smith."
American Dad! (2005)
"Get in the trunk, Barry."
American Dad! (2005)
"In my "I don't need any family"room."
American Dad! (2005)
"mypool filled with cherryJell-O."
American Dad! (2005)
"You're finished. I'm out ofhere."
American Dad! (2005)
"Steve, welcome."
American Dad! (2005)
"- S, we didn't do it. - Yeah, right."
American Dad! (2005)
"No."
American Dad! (2005)
"Langley Falls' legendary bad-boy author look like this."
American Dad! (2005)
"Well, what a nice visit."
American Dad! (2005)
"- No. - How about now?"
American Dad! (2005)
"You're so adorable."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, my God! I- l killed Steve."
American Dad! (2005)
"Mydark descent all the wayto the top."
American Dad! (2005)
"Child prodigy, and most likely..."
American Dad! (2005)
"Did it all go to my head?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, I don't want to be recorded."
American Dad! (2005)
"Hates you, huh?"
American Dad! (2005)
"All right. But I didn't miss them."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Gosh. I'm sorry. - I'm not."
American Dad! (2005)
"my English teacher, Mr. Durban, is your biggest fan."
American Dad! (2005)
"Watch it, Klaus, or I'm gonna cram this bad boy 20,000 leagues upyour butt."
American Dad! (2005)
"Now do I get to meet that centerfold?"
American Dad! (2005)
"But Hayleywas the cesarean."
American Dad! (2005)
"Slowly, pretty boy."
American Dad! (2005)
"Yeah? Well, you can forget it. You used me and you lied to me."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Dude, where'd you go?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Spike Baltar, you're my favorite actor."
American Dad! (2005)
"That's because he's gonna playyou in the movie version..."
American Dad! (2005)
"Well, this is where ourstorystarted."
American Dad! (2005)
"Absolutely. Anyway, the only good hairdresser left is Mr. Beauregard."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Why do you hate my son?"
American Dad! (2005)
""Can't"? We don't live in "Ameri-can't," Steve."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Oh, Mr. Beauregard, I feel born anew."
American Dad! (2005)
"You wrote a story about me?"
American Dad! (2005)
"I'll take that, Dad. Huh. Mr. Durban said he was gonna submit my story to a publisher."
American Dad! (2005)
"As boring as a bad metaphor... or a simile."
American Dad! (2005)
"Look, Son, you do this for me, and I'll use my C.I.A. powers..."
American Dad! (2005)
"That's what I said to my old ugly hairdo."
American Dad! (2005)
"The court ruled in myfavor..."
American Dad! (2005)
"Aw, this should all be mine."
American Dad! (2005)
"Yeah, the kid's a total douche."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Die, dream stealer!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Onlythe dead kid isn't me."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh! That I ittle creep is I ivi ng the star I ifestyle I deserve."
American Dad! (2005)
"I was too busy tending to mystately pleasure dome, Steveadoo."
American Dad! (2005)
"Mmm, success."
American Dad! (2005)