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Clips from Community (2009) - Intro to Political Science (S02E02)

"Oh. I wanna go to rehab and compare penises with people."
Community (2009)
"I'm assuming. Yeah?"
Community (2009)
"The vice president is coming."
Community (2009)
"Only problem, Mr. Biden is supposed to be meeting with the dean, hmm,"
Community (2009)
"I mean, I could borrow my sister's Uncle Sam outfit."
Community (2009)
"But the fact is, men have fought and died"
Community (2009)
"And yes, this is a ladies' Uncle Sam outfit."
Community (2009)
"It was last minute. I had no choice."
Community (2009)
"What happened to that pile of campaign fliers?"
Community (2009)
"I wanted ice cream, so I got in line..."
Community (2009)
"and join together to support a larger cause."
Community (2009)
"Where were you a week ago?"
Community (2009)
"My name is Annie Edison."
Community (2009)
"I think 9l11 was bad."
Community (2009)
"Yeah."
Community (2009)
"- Countdown has begun. - Tonight, one student will be president,"
Community (2009)
"Knock it off. You're not running sincerely."
Community (2009)
"Thank you, Ms. Edison."
Community (2009)
"What will I do, dean?"
Community (2009)
"Same question. Same answer."
Community (2009)
"Couldn't you just pick the sixth kid every time? That's what I..."
Community (2009)
"I just want to clean up Greendale."
Community (2009)
"of course it's dirty. Everyone knows that."
Community (2009)
"Read my lips."
Community (2009)
"No matter what you're..."
Community (2009)
"Or you wish I was suspicious so that you would have an excuse to see me."
Community (2009)
"For my closing statement,"
Community (2009)
"Magnitude, a response?"
Community (2009)
"Pop, pop."
Community (2009)
"Pop. Pop."
Community (2009)
"I just couldn't admit it until I saw you running away crying."
Community (2009)
"because it is the self that wants to be destroyed."
Community (2009)
"and Leonard Rodriguez."
Community (2009)
"A competition reflecting the pointlessness of life."
Community (2009)
"I'm told that Dean Pelton is prepared to announce a winner."
Community (2009)
"We can never stop being friends."
Community (2009)
"Did you know you could make napalm out of dish soap and cat food?"
Community (2009)
"So I go into the bathroom with Tom,"
Community (2009)
"and we both, you know, take them out."
Community (2009)
"And I say, "Size more? Try size less." Ha-ha-ha."
Community (2009)
"All in good time, kiddo."
Community (2009)
"Well, uh, Pierce, we're very glad to have you back."
Community (2009)
"- Yeah. - Yeah."
Community (2009)
"So, what should we do now?"
Community (2009)
"I don't wanna be that guy, but I guess we should start studying anthropology."
Community (2009)
"- Yes. - Yeah."
Community (2009)
"Okay. Um..."
Community (2009)
"Chapter four."
Community (2009)
"Oh. Yes. Oh, my God."
Community (2009)
"Thank you. What is it, dean?"
Community (2009)
"Oh, ha-ha, I have exciting news."
Community (2009)
"Vice president Joe Biden"
Community (2009)
"has been visiting community colleges across the country"
Community (2009)
"as part of his Biden Time Talking About Teaching tour."
Community (2009)
"Hmm. Folksy, yet progressive. It does walk that line."
Community (2009)
"Anyway, his tour is taking him in this neck of the woods"
Community (2009)
"and at 5:00 p.m. Today, he is stopping by Greendale."
Community (2009)
"Eat that, city college and wash it down with a nice tall glass of suck it."
Community (2009)
"That explains the people covertly surveilling the campus."
Community (2009)
"Must be Secret Service. Will your reality ever come out"
Community (2009)
"on Blu-ray so we can enjoy it? We've been made."
Community (2009)
"and the head of our student government which doesn't exist."
Community (2009)
"So we have seven hours to elect a student president."
Community (2009)
"Ah. What am I gonna wear?"
Community (2009)
"It's tailored for ladies,"
Community (2009)
"but what else can I do on such short notice?"
Community (2009)
"Well, you cannot dress up like Uncle Sam."
Community (2009)
"Or admit you don't have a sister. We're electing a student president."
Community (2009)
"I wanna run. I have so many ideas for improving the school."
Community (2009)
"Improving Greendale takes more than ideas, Annie."
Community (2009)
"It takes time, gasoline, matches."
Community (2009)
"Mm. Nice."
Community (2009)
"Jeff, some of us care about more"
Community (2009)
"than just fixing our hair and sculpting our abs."
Community (2009)
"- Wow, you got me pegged. - Democracy. What a ruse."
Community (2009)
"There's no such thing as a system in which the masses..."
Community (2009)
"Everyone wants you to shut up. And yet I won't."
Community (2009)
"Case in point."
Community (2009)
"We tend to take democracy for granted in America."
Community (2009)
"for the sacred right we exercise today."
Community (2009)
"So anyone who wants to be president,"
Community (2009)
"line up by the ice cream machine."
Community (2009)
"Your applause will determine who gets into the primaries."
Community (2009)
"It's my sister's."
Community (2009)
"I wonder if that's the same sister that tweets me"
Community (2009)
"to ask if I think her brother's cute."
Community (2009)
"I hung them all up."
Community (2009)
"Real nice. Is it too much to ask you to pitch in?"
Community (2009)
"I'm sorry, Annie. I'm not the worker bee type."
Community (2009)
"I'm more of a silverback gorilla with the claws of a lion,"
Community (2009)
"the teeth of a shark, and quiet dignity of a tortoise."
Community (2009)
"- All right, first up is this fella. - Let's go, come on."
Community (2009)
"All right, tell everybody your name."
Community (2009)
"Garrett. Okay, Garrett."
Community (2009)
"And why do you wanna be president?"
Community (2009)
"Okay, okay. He wanted ice cream."
Community (2009)
"So, what do we say, gang?"
Community (2009)
"Does he make it to the next round? By applause."
Community (2009)
"Oh, we've got our first nominee."
Community (2009)
"The bar has been set."
Community (2009)
"At least worker bees can set aside their egos"
Community (2009)
"Oh, right, because politics are all about larger causes."
Community (2009)
"Face it, Annie."
Community (2009)
"Politics are all about ego, popularity, and parlor tricks."
Community (2009)
"Don't kid a lawyer."
Community (2009)
"Well, if I see one, I won't."
Community (2009)
"Oh, it's a girl. Look at this."
Community (2009)
"She's got a yellow shirt and a hat. Who are you, sweetie?"
Community (2009)
"Uh... Vicki. Who's up for some Vicki?"
Community (2009)
"Abed Nadir, I'm Special Agent Robin Vohlers."
Community (2009)
"This is Special Agent Keenlan of the Secret Service."
Community (2009)
"Will you submit to a search of your belongings?"
Community (2009)
"Sure."
Community (2009)
"How did you notice the campus was being observed?"
Community (2009)
"I guess I noticed because I'm used to being the only observer."
Community (2009)
"Well, we're not used to being noticed. That sounds a little sad."
Community (2009)
"He's clean."
Community (2009)
"Although I could issue a warning for this bootleg of The Last Airbender."
Community (2009)
"You can keep it."
Community (2009)
"Well, another one makes the cut. Congratulations, Leonard."
Community (2009)
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