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Clips from Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Teacher's Pet (S01E01)

"She takes you out of the cage, ties you up"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"and she starts movin' and throbbin' and these eggs come shootin' out of her."
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"- She...? - That's not the worst part."
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"While she's, you know, in the middle of..."
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"- I don't wanna die like that. - Blayne. Blayne, chill."
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"That's good. It's gonna be OK. We'll get out of this."
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"You got a plan? What is it?"
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"Oh, God. Oh, God."
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"I understand, Carlyle."
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"Yes, I'll take every precaution."
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"Absolutely. It sounds exactly like the creature you described."
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"You were right all along, about everything."
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"No, you weren't right about your mother coming back as a Pekinese, but..."
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"Try to rest, old man. Yes. Ta-ta."
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"Bye now."
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"Dr Ferris Carlyle spent years transcribing a lost pre-Germanic language."
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"What he discovered he kept to himself, until some boys were murdered in the Cotswolds."
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"Then he went hunting for it."
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"- It being...? - He calls her a she-mantis."
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"This type of creature, the kleptes-virgo or virgin-thief, appears in many cultures."
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"The Greek sirens, the Celtic sea maidens who tore the living flesh from..."
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"Well, basically the she-mantis assumes the form of a beautiful woman..."
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"Well, Xander's not a..."
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"- I mean, he's probably... - Gonna die."
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"OK, OK. So this thing is breeding and we need to find it and snuff it."
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"Any tips on the snuffing part?"
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"- Slice and dice. - It'd better be swift. This beast is deadly."
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"Carlyle faced it and he's still around."
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"Yes, in a straitjacket, howling his innards out day and night."
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"- OK, Admiral, way to inspire the troops. - Sorry."
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"Xander's not home. He told his mom he was going to his teacher's house to do a project."
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"And you need to record bat sonar, and fast."
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"Bat sonar. Right. What?"
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"Bats eat them. A mantis hears sonar, its nervous system goes kaplooie."
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"- Where will I find... - In the vid library."
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"There are no books, but it's dark and musty. You'll feel right at home. Go!"
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"I guess I'll handle the armoury."
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"Don't do anything to make her mad."
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"Hey, all right! Now I can get out of my cage!"
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"- Into yours. What'd you do that for? - A weapon."
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"- Getting the address. - Great. Giles?"
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"Recording bat sonar is something akin to having one's teeth drilled."
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"Let's roll."
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"According to Miss French's personnel records, she was born in 1907."
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"- She's, like, 90 years old. - And extremely well-preserved."
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"He broke the cage. Take him, not me. Take him!"
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"What now? We can'tjust kick the door down."
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"Yeah, that would be wrong!"
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"Hello, dear. I thought I heard..."
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"Are you selling something? Because I'd like to help you out,"
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"but, you see, I'm on a fixed income."
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"- I'm looking for Miss French. - I'm Miss French."
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"Natalie French, the substitute biology teacher?"
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"Goodness, that's me!"
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"I taught for over 30 years."
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"I retired in 1972."
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"I can't believe it! She used Miss French's records. She could be anywhere."
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"No, dear. I'm right here."
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"What's she doing?"
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"I think it's"
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"eeny, meany, miney"
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"- What do we do now? - Prayer and supplication spring to mind."
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"She walked past this park with grocery bags. She lives here."
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"- I'm gonna bang on doors. - Wait! We do not have time."
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"- We have to do something! - We will."
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"I won't be long."
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"Buffy?"
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"Like your eggs sunny-side up?"
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"Eggs? She's gonna lay some..."
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"The California mantis lays her eggs and then finds a mate to fertilise them."
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"Come on, Buffy!"
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"- You! - Me."
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"Come on! Come on! Where is she?"
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"Which house is it? I know you're afraid of her. I saw you!"
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"Come on, come on."
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"What? What is it? This is her, isn't it? This is her house."
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"This is it! Better than radar!"
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"Kiss me."
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"- Kiss me. - Can I say one thing?"
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"Help!"
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"Uh, hey! Over here! Hello? In the cage!"
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"Let him go!"
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"- Help me! - Get them out."
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"Help me! Help me!"
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"Remember Dr Gregory? You scarfed his head."
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"He taught me: you do your homework, you learn stuff."
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"Like what happens to your nervous system when you hear this."
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"It's important to file..."
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"Bat sonar makes your whole nervous system go to hell."
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"You can go there with it."
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"- Well, I'd say it's deceased. - And dissected."
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"- You OK? - Yeah."
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"Just for the record, you were right. I'm an idiot, and God bless you."
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"- And thank you guys, too. - Yeah, really."
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"- Pleasure. - I'm really glad you're OK."
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"What?"
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"I mean, here you guys are, doing the right thing, when a lot of other boys your age..."
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"Isn't this a perfect ending to a wonderful day!"
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"My dad's a lawyer. Anybody repeats this to anybody is gonna face a lawsuit."
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"Blayne, shut up!"
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"I don't think it's bad. I think it's really sweet."
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"It's certainly nothing I'll ever bring up again."
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"I heard a rumour there was one less vampire walking round making a nuisance of himself."
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"There is. I guess I should thank you for the tip."
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"The pleasure's mine."
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"Of course, it would be easier if I knew how to get in touch with you."
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"I'll be around."
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"Or who you were."
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"Well, anyway, you can have yourjacket back."
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"It looks better on you."
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"All midterm papers will be exactly six pages long."
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"No more, no less."
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"One third of your grade will be dependent on those papers."
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"No more, no less."
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"Urgh! Argh!"
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"Xander!"
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"Amazingly enough, I don't care."
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"- Who's that? - That must be Angel... I think."
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"Oh, thank you, Blayne."
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"The California mantis lays her eggs and then finds a mate to fertilise them."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
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